Ultimate Pocket Rocket

This was a forum recommendation. I was told this was a rumbly pocket rocket. I bought this even though I was unsure of if such a thing could exist. The Ultimate Massager proves that it does. I had to lube up to get the full rumble effect, which made me a little sad, but doesn't stop me from loving this toy all the same. Two of the tips that come with it are spiked. This doesn't make a ton of sense to me since you know very few people are actually buying this to use on their necks.
Published:
Pros
Rumbly vibrations
Strong
Multiple tip options
Lots of patterns
Cons
Two tips are spiked
Have to use lube to get full rumble effect
Rating by reviewer:
5
extremely useful review

Use

The Ultimate Massager is a pocket rocket used for external stimulation. Since you're buying it from a sex store, odds are that you're planning to use this on your clitoris or some other external area that you'd like stimulation. If it turns out that this doesn't work for that purpose, this doubles as a great neck and foot massager. Gotta love toys you can use in non-sexual ways. This should not be inserted vaginally or anally. External use only!

This is a waterproof toy, so you can use it anywhere you'd like. I used this mostly for solo play, but it could be great for foreplay as well. It's not quite as good as a small bullet for use during sex, but it could be used that way if you were in a pinch.

Material / Texture

The Ultimate Massager is made of plastic. This puts it at an 8 on the safety scale. There are a few different sections of plastic on this. The white part at the base is a shiny plastic. It has a raised heart design on it. You won't be inserting this, so the added texture doesn't make a difference. The pink part is a plastic that feels like it has a velvet coating to it. It's soft and velvety. The three balls at the tip appear to be made of some type of metal, but I can't confirm this. The package says the bottom is ABS plastic and the top is PU plastic. It doesn't say what the round balls are made of.

What you'll actually be using are the four interchangeable tips that come with this. They each are made of a firm plastic with no give to them. They have different textures.



The one to the upper left is made of a bunch of larger spikes surrounded by a circle of tiny spikes. I didn't use this one sexually. I mean, it's made of spikes!! That just didn't seem pleasurable to me. You're welcome to try it if you'd like. It did feel nice on my neck, but I could feel the spikes on it. It felt prickly but not stabbing.

The one to the upper left is made of five small circles with one small circle in the middle. I used this one often and it's probably my favorite one. I can feel the raised circles somewhat, but not so much that they are painful. They are hard plastic, so they don't have any give. If you're very sensitive, you may not be able to use this.

At the bottom left, there is another spiky option. This one has medium spikes as opposed to lots of smaller spikes. I'm not sure why half of the four tips are spiked in what is clearly marketed as a sex toy. Yes, you can use this as a neck massager, but is that really what people are buying this for? I think not. Anyway, I didn't try this one sexually either. I just wasn't into the spikes on my clit.

At the bottom right, there is a dome shaped tip. This one was great as well. You lose some of the power when you use this one because there is a lot of space between the tip of the dome and the tip of the massager. There's still a lot of power even with this tip on. It's a smooth surface, so this will be best for sensitive users.

There is no plastic smell or taste to any of the parts of this toy. There is also no taste.

There should be something here for everyone from beginners to advanced users. If you like a bit of pain, you can even give the spiked tips a go.

Design / Shape / Size

Pocket Rockets are so named because they can fit in your pocket, or so I assume. This one is 5 inches long and 1 inch wide.



It fits nicely in my hand. If held to the tip of my middle finger, it comes about mid way down my palm.



The size of this was easy to use during use. The vibrations did not travel up the shaft and numb my hand. I found this size sometimes better than smaller bullets because I was able to use one hand to operate both this and an internal vibrator if I was having an especially coordinated day.

The size is great for hiding, as is the design. You can say you got this as a neck massager, though I'm sure most people will know you're lying. I didn't test if this actually fit in my pocket, but it stashes easily in a drawer and is travel ready.

Functions / Performance / Controls

There are two portions to the controls. The first is a twist in the middle of the toy. This controls the on/off feature. To turn it on, twist to the "on" position. After you've done this, the rest of the options are controlled via a button near the bottom of the toy. Press this button to scroll through the power levels and patterns. You can turn it off by switching to the off section or holding down the button for three seconds. The button was easy to press and I never accidentally hit it or twisted it during use.



There are three constant vibration modes. The first is a high level two/low level three. The next is a mid to high level three. The next is a mid to high level four.

The vibrations are a little hard to describe for me since I had two different experiences with them. I found that if I didn't use lube with this, the vibrations had a slightly buzzy feel to them. They were still on the rumbly side, but had a buzzy undercurrent to them. Once I applied lube, the buzzy feel seemed to disappear and this became a very rumbly toy. Now, when held in my hand I can feel the vibrations go down to about my wrist and not my whole arm. They vibrations are not surface level and penetrate through the skin. They do not cause any numbing or itching sensation. I don't like to lube up external vibrators as I like the drag externally. I ended up just using a drop of lube or what happened to travel upward from what I was using with my internal vibrator when I used this. That seemed to take care of the buzzy undercurrent and made the vibrations very pleasurable. I would note that this isn't rumbly to the level of some of my luxury vibrators. It does get pretty close, especially considering the price point on this. It's rare to find a rumbly external vibrator that doesn't cost a ton of money and I was more than satisfied with this one once I figure out the lube trick.

The vibrations are centered at the tip of the vibrator. They radiate about halfway up the toy. They don't go far enough up for you to feel them in your hands.

In addition to the constant vibration modes, you also get some patterns to pick from. The first is a moderate pulse. The next goes 1-2-1-2-1-2 with the two lasting longer than the one. The next goes 1-2-3-1-2-3 with the one and two at the same pace and the three being held out. The next goes through the speeds with a stop in between each one. The next has a slow rumble, two pulses, then escalates in speed, and then two more pulses. The next is a slow rumble that then escalates, a pulse, a constant vibration, then a pulse, then constant vibration, and then goes back down and finishes with a pulse. The next has a pulse, an escalation, a pulse in varying power levels, an escalation, and then a pulse in varying speeds. That's a lot of patterns! I wish I liked them because that's a lot to choose from.

This is about the same noise level as my cell phone. I can mostly muffle it through covers and cannot hear it through a closed door.

It is waterproof. I have had no issues washing this or submerging it. It is protected by an O ring around the battery compartment.

You will need 1 AA battery to operate this toy, which is not included. It twist apart at the same part that you twist to turn on.

Care and Maintenance

Waterproof toys are easy to care for. Just wash off with soap and water or toy cleaner or spray.

I store mine in the original packaging because I'm sure I'd lose the tips otherwise. You could always use some type of baggie. If you're drawers are really organized and you wouldn't lose the tips, you can put this in a drawer.

You can use all types of lubes with this toy. Silicone, oil, and water are all okay. Pick your favorite!

Packaging

The packaging here is pretty simple. It's a package that's meant for hanging in a store. It's a clear package with a paper insert. The paper insert says "Ultimate Massager" and "10 Sensual Functions" on the front. It also says "4 Exciting Stimulating Tips." The back has a large picture of the toy and tips along with the same wording. It has some info on the batteries and that it's waterproof. There are no instructions included, but this one is pretty self explanatory.



Personal comments

I would recommend this toy to anyone who likes moderate to moderately high vibrations. If you need Hitachi strength, this won't do it. If you need mild vibrations, this doesn't really do that either. If you need that middle ground with some kick, this will be a great addition. The rumbly vibrations are something that isn't found to often in external vibrators, especially pocket rockets. While I had to lube up to get the most out of them, the vibration type was very impressive. If you're looking to add a pocket rocket to your collection, check out the Ultimate Massager.

Experience

I used to buy a lot of pocket rockets years ago. After finding them all to be way too buzzy, I gave up on them. I don't think I've bought one in at least five or six years. Apparently, there have been some upgrades in pocket rockets in those years. That, or the stores I was shopping at just had a really awful selection. Either way, this toy was recommended in the forums in a thread about rumbly vibrators. I was skeptical. A rumbly pocket rocket? Ha!

I'm happy to say that this is, indeed, a pretty rumbly pocket rocket! In fact, this has become one of the most used toys in my collection since I got it. It certainly hasn't replaced my rumbly luxury clit vibes, but I use it a good bit. I like the extra length because I seem to fumble around a lot less than I do with my smaller vibes when I'm trying to use an insertable vibrator and an external one.

This one earns five stars from me. My only complaints are that I have to use lube and that I wish the other two attachments would have been more clit friendly.
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  • Contributor: - Kira -
    Thanks and you're welcome!
  • Contributor: ace.eric.pollen
    thanks for the review!
  • Contributor: SkinFlute
    awesome review!
  • Contributor: marrythenight
    This is a very well-written and detailed review! Thank you!
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