Top or Bottom: This book is a MUST read!

This is a must read, whether you are a Top or Bottom in your BDSM world. It gives great, psychological insight into the world and mindset of a bottom, whether you play scenes, or live in a 24/7 BDSM relationship.
Published:
Pros:
Easy to read, very insightful, good info for all roles to know.
Cons:
none
Rating by reviewer:
5
extremely useful review

About author

The authors, Dossie Easton (who identifies as a dyke queer bottom) and Janet W. Hardy (who identifies as a bisexual switch) are both veterans in the S/M world. They have written other books, namely, the first versions of The Topping Book and The Bottoming Book, and The Ethical Slut. Before this, the only thing I had read by them was The New Topping book, which I ordered at the same time as this book. Their style of writing is very conversational, and easy to read.
    • Engaging
    • Expert author
    • Multiple contributoring authors

Content / Style / Audience

This book was very different than The New Topping Book, which I also did a review on. Go ahead. Read that review. I'll wait.

Back now? Good.

So, as you can see, The New Topping Book didn't have any of what I was really looking for in it. The New Bottoming book, however, was totally different. While it didn't spend a whole lot of time delving into information about a 24/7 BDSM relationship, the information was still very helpful. Whether you are a top or bottom, seeing into the world of a bottom is incredibly insightful. In order to be a good top, you have to get into the mind of your bottom, and this book is a GREAT start. One passage from the book reads:

"A friend of ours was topping an interrogation scene, in which she set out to conquer the bottom and get him all soft and squishy, as she imagined was her task. The bottom in this case, however, in his own fantasy saw himself as nobly suffering and refusing to give in no matter how hard it was: in short, wanted to conquer an ordeal. It soon became obvious that they were working at cross purposes in the scene, and the bottom eventually, and appropriately, safeworded out."

This came from a section of the book that talked about how some bottoms like to feel big and strong, like they are overcoming, and some want to feel small, and helpless.

The chapters are as follows, with the chapter sections in parenthesis:
Foreword
1. Introducing Ourselves (Who are we?, Who are you?, Reclaiming Our Greed)
2. What Kind of Player Are You, Anyways? (The "Full Power Bottom", Bridging the Gap Between Fantasy and Reality)
3. Staying Safe and Happy (Negotiating for Bigger and Better Scenes, Keeping it Consensual)
4. The Bridge to Reality (What's the Same? What's Different)
5. Connecting (Choosing Tops)
6. Getting What You Want, and Lots of It! (Responsibility, Where is Your Power?, What's in it For You?)
7. The Rewards
8. Getting Ready
9. Ending the Scene - And Afterwards
10. Playing: Scripts, Scenes, and Roles (Bondage, Submission, Pain (The Good Kind), Body Modification, Lookin' Good, Let's Pretend, Rough and Tough, Humiliation and Verbal Abuse, Some Notes on Public Play)
11. S/M and Spirituality (Sex is Spiritual, Sacred Space, Kundalini and the Chakras, Conscious Ritual Here and Elsewhere, Communication, Transcendence and Transformation)
Conclusion: The Alchemical Bottom (You are a Crucible)
Resource Guide
Poem

The book is 173 pages, so not as long as The New Topping Book, but it feels like it's packed with SO much more information.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Bdsm
    • Bottoms
    • Tops
  • General
    [ ? ]
    Other tags that are useful and descriptive for this product.
    • Bdsm
    • Fetish
    • Instructional / educational

Personal comments

If you've ever:
-Wanted to know why anyone would be submissive/bottom
-Wanted to be submissive/bottom
-Wanted to know more about BDSM
-Wanted to be a top/dominant
-Wanted to bring your sex life to a new level

This book is for you. I can't stress enough, without sitting here and typing out excerpt after excerpt from the book, why this book is so informative and amazing to read.


Why are you still reading this? Add it to your cart already! And don't forget to add a free gift too!
Follow-up commentary
I'm not faulting the book for the issue I'm having right now, but when I read it, it made it sound so easy to be a bottom, and it really just isn't that easy. At least for me, since I'm naturally a top. Remembering some of the things in the book helps me as far as coping with how I feel sometimes, but it is much more emotional than I expected it to be after reading this book.
This product was provided at a discounted price in exchange for an unbiased review. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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Comments
  • Isabel0329
    Isabel0329  
    Bought this book awhile back and still need to read it. :-/ Thanks for the review.
  • Bex1331
    Bex1331  
    Thanks for the great review! I was looking at there series and after I read your review on the New Topping Book I was a bit disappointed I'm glad this one is so much beter!
  • Zandrock
    Zandrock  
    Nice review
  • freshbananas
    freshbananas  
    Great review, this looks like a great read
  • SMichelle
    SMichelle  
    Great review!
  • calmyotittays
    calmyotittays  
    thanks
  • Master DarkWolf
    Master DarkWolf  
    Good review...
  • DreamWolf
    DreamWolf  
    Great review!
  • maddameheather
    maddameheather  
    ty great review
  • Tessa Taboo
    Tessa Taboo  
    Thanks all!
  • closed account
    closed account  
    problem is I've been waiting for months for it to come back in stock.
    gonna have to look elsewhere or try classifieds. Great review! Very engaging.
  • Geogeo
    Geogeo  
    Wishlisting, thanks!
  • SaiDiscordia
    SaiDiscordia  
    Great review. Really looking forward to my hubby being able to get more into my mind as a sub. Can't wait to get the book.
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