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Clit takes a bullet!

It's definitely worth it! Although I let the shape of the toy get the better part of me and put off trying this baby until last, I regret it because it's wonderful. The vibrations are strong, has great drag, and is easy to hold. Even with the loud vibrations and lack of instructions, it doesn't take away from this toy at all. All it states is that it's a massager, and doesn't state its intended use. Guess it leaves that up to your imagination.

Even with the confusion of what this toy was real
Published:
Pros:
Strong Vibrations, Easy to hold, Velvety coating, Drag, Small/discrete, Great battery life
Cons:
Loud, Confusing at first, No instructions, Not completely waterproof
Rating by reviewer:
5
extremely useful review

Use

Yes, I did in fact just trade up my vibe for this bullet! Finally I found one worthy enough of taking its place!

This toy is best suited for clitoral stimulation. It is great for beginners and advanced users. I did debate whether or not this was for g-spot stimulation, and after trying it (many ways I might add) I will say that the bullet is too short to reach my g-spot. The Total Euphoria Discreet Massager is very easy to use with a partner as well as during solo play. The handle makes it easy for a partner to hold on while stimulating the clit, and easy for you to hold while inserting it for vaginal play.

Material / Texture

There was a very mild "New Product" smell. When I say mild I mean I could barely smell it even when held up to my nose. There was no taste thankfully. The Total Euphoria Discreet Massager is made of plastic and has a velvety coating, which is great because it adds extra drag. It is very smooth and easy to hold. The velvety coating was great! I didn't even realize that I was wet until I finished, brought the toy back up, and saw that the bullet was wet. I laughed because normally with my #1 vibe (which is plastic) I would constantly have to be cleaning up so it would stop slipping and sliding. The texture is great for anyone!

Design / Shape / Size

Honestly this shape was beyond confusing. I suppose it's because the bullet is not long enough to actually be used as a g-spot stimulator, and I was skeptical to use the handle vaginally because of the battery compartment. The size of the toy itself is great! It is small and discreet, but still strong and powerful.

The bullet size is a little over 2 inches according to the packaging, but according to my measurements it is a little short of 2 inches. Everyone's anatomy is different, and although I feel the vibrations, it's just not long enough to take me all the way and hit my G-spot.

Functions / Performance / Controls

The Total Euphoria Discreet Massager runs on 2-AAA batteries, and seems to have a long lasting battery life. For a while I was taking the batteries out, but now I keep them in the toy for easier use. The vibrations do not seem to dull or die down after extended use.

It turns on simply with a push button that it has in the center. The first click will have it on the first setting. The Total Euphoria Discreet Massager has three settings; the first one is a medium-high steady vibration, the second one is a high steady vibration, and the third one is a pulsating vibration at steady intervals.

The vibrations are really strong and powerful and can be felt the best on the bullet, although they are also felt on the handle/other end. To be honest I enjoyed all three of the settings, and as stated in my "Experience", I used all three in one orgasm! Made that orgasm super great!

Although the size is discreet and is about the size of the palm of my hand with my index finger extended, its vibrations are still kind of loud. They are not loud enough to hear from behind closed doors in a big room, but maybe from the bathroom, and if the room is quiet you might attract some attention. It can definitely be heard in the same room. If some one is listening for it, it will be heard even with the T.V. on at a decent volume.

The waterproof function works best in the shower. I did try submerging it in a tub full of water and only a little bit of water got in the crease of where it closes. The battery compartment was not wet at all, so it did in fact work in the shower and in the bath. **** JUST MAKE SURE IT IS CLOSED RIGHT****

Care and Maintenance

Since it is a small toy, it is very easy to store. Cleaning is simple! Warm water and some antibacterial soap, or just regular toy cleaner, will get the job done. To add to its already easy clean up it is also waterproof, so no need to worry about getting water in the wrong places (Considering you have the cap on tight enough and nothing is open).

Packaging

The Total Euphoria Discreet Massager came in a clear box, which was easy to open. Details for this toy were printed on the box, but there were no instructions. Nothing stated the use for this toy, which made it a little confusing. The box stays in good shape to store it back in its original packaging if you do not use it often, but I do not see myself putting this back in its original package.

Personal comments

When I first received the Total Euphoria Discreet Massager I was a little confused as to how it was to be used exactly. I knew I wanted it as a clitoral stimulator, and debated as to whether there was really any other use for it. With the vibrations to this toy being on the shorter side and the other end (the handle) being a good length for g-spot stimulation, the confusion continued. The battery compartment is on the handle side, which was also another reason why I could not figure out if in fact this could be used as a g-spot stimulator. Seeing how the Total Euphoria Discreet Massager is water proof the answer to my own question was yes, yes it can be used as a g-spot stimulator. Whether or not it was intended for that purpose I have no idea, since there really were no instructions on the packaging.
    • Confusing

Experience

Total Euphoria Discreet Massager is now the replacement, for my #1 Vibe! I have been getting discouraged, thinking that no toy would ever measure up to my first (and perfect clit stimulating) vibe. Well I was proven wrong! I was so hesitant when it came to trying this because it looked so confusing, and I was let down with a few others, that the best idea after a long day just seemed to be to pull out my #1 and make it quick and easy!

I literally had to turn this toy off several times during use to keep myself from finishing too quickly. I wanted to enjoy the vibrations and different settings for a while longer before calling it a night. What really got me was when I had it on the pulsating setting (the third setting) I was able to get off. I started my orgasm on the third setting (pulsating), and as it peaked I set it to the first setting (medium-High Vibration), and finished myself off on the second setting (High). Wow! It was love at first use! I guess it is true, don't judge a book by its cover. I surely did and boy was I ever wrong.

For G-spot stimulation I inserted the bullet, and with the control button facing down, tried putting the handle against my clit. Well the bullet is too small to stimulate the g-spot, and the handle doesn't get enough vibrations from the bullet to stimulate the clit.

After a long debate (with myself) about inserting the other end to see if that would make a difference, I did try it out, and managed to get the bullet to touch my clit. Between the low vibrations that the bullet sent to the handle (the part I decided to insert) and the bullet's strong vibrations on my clit, I managed to get off in a little amount of time. The debate about inserting the handle was because that is the end where the batteries are inserted. But after deciding that in fact this is a waterproof toy, and it should be safe, I gave it a try.

In the shower the Total Euphoria Discreet Massager has no problems, no leaks, and in fact adds to the sensation of the strong bullet. When submerged under water it leaks a little bit but not into where the battery is kept, but in fact at the crease (opening) where you insert the batteries. I first tried it when washing it off in a small amount of water, because I did notice that when I inserted it some vaginal fluids made its way in, but only through the crease, and not into the where the batteries are kept. My experience in the bath tub was great. Sitting in the warm bath water while teasing my clit, made for a very relaxing evening. *** Make sure that you tighten everything before you put it in water as well as before washing it***
Follow-up commentary
As I use it more and more I love it more than before. Some cons that I noticed after prolonged use are: the vibrations get louder, it gets hot, sometimes it turns on some times it doesn't (it acts up), and, unlike I had originally thought and noticed, it is a battery guzzler! Still a great toy and gets the job done quick - always a plus in my book!
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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This review was edited by
  • NuMe NuMe
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Comments
  • Danielle915
    Danielle915  
    Very very nice review!
  • Miss T
    Miss T  
    Great review!
  • Adam02viper
    Adam02viper  
    Thanks for the review.
  • Alice.C
    Alice.C  
    Thanks!
  • Eucaly
    Eucaly  
    Sounds like a confusing toy! Thanks for the review!
  • lalapetitee
    lalapetitee  
    Thanks!
  • Piña Colada
    Piña Colada  
    thanks for the review!
  • MamaDivine
    MamaDivine  
    Thanks for the review! Love the color on this one
  • Stinkytofu10
    Stinkytofu10  
    thank you for the very helpful written review!
  • KittenPrincess
    KittenPrincess  
    Thanks for such a detailed review.
  • AmberM
    AmberM  
    Thanks for the review.
  • Apirka
    Apirka  
    Great thorough review! Thanks for sharing
  • Tbanda
    Tbanda  
    Thank you!
  • Peres2013
    Peres2013  
    Good review!
  • xjonxthexgreenx
    xjonxthexgreenx  
    thanks for the review
  • The Vixen
    The Vixen  
    Thanks for the review!
  • Jenny Smith
    Jenny Smith  
    Thanks for the review
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