Hedonism-virtues vs. drawbacks

Contributor: CajunErin CajunErin
CajunErin
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I refer to myself as a die-hard hedonist. I have always understood this to mean that I enjoy any and all forms of pleasure, and that I am non-judgmental of others' desires. I am also a voyeur, in that I really enjoy watching my husband with others, as opposed to actually participating.
Assuming I'm not mistaken as to what exactly hedonism is, I wonder how many more of us are out there and a)don't know it, b)are scared of it, c)don't understand it and/or d)don't know what to do about it.
I am also interested in hearing feedback as to the pros and cons of practicing hedonism. Am I non-judgmental to the point of overlooking "red flags"? Can someone indulge in ultimate pleasures freely and not forget how to enjoy basic intimacy? Lastly, is the notion of being absent of all inhibitions a positive thing or a negative one?
I would like to think that we would all love a place where we can go, hang out with accepting people, have a good time and go home with no regrets. But I have noticed that the people my husband and I have been "hooking up" with have a hard time understanding the concept of doing what feels good. They tend to be unable to cast off the "politically correct" behaviors instilled in all of us. Even when there's no actual basis for them. I have also noticed that people don't know how to be honest. Not that they aren't willing, but that people have been trained not to reveal desires that may be considered taboo; that people fear others' opinions of them, to the point of emasculation, to ensure no one thinks negatively of them; and that an innate desire to do everything right makes it impossible to actually get it done.
In my opinion, Hedonism is the ability to do everything wrong and still give and receive pleasure without fear of reprisal. Knowing your partner is thoroughly enjoying watching you with another person even if neither one of you is a movie star. That if the transition from missionary to doggie-style isn't as smooth as the movies, no one's the worse for it.
Basically, I would like to think that the ability to be myself, no matter who that is, and allow others the same is the basic principle of Hedonism and a very satisfying way to live.
I look forward to hearing your input and queries on this.
03/26/2011
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