If it was your Birthday...

Contributor: SecretToyLover2 SecretToyLover2
And you personally invited 5 or 6 people out to dinner with you, would YOU pay for the meal? I have some good friends who invited me and three others out for their birthday (two days apart from each other, couple) and would not let me pay. They said it was Romanian tradition to pay for all their dinner guests, even if it was a special occasion.

I ended up shoving $17 in my friend's purse when she wasn't looking. I hate letting people pay for me on their birthday. What do you do?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
I am a male
leanright69 , MistressDandelion , DiamondKoala , married with children , GONE! , BlooJay , Stagger13 , Hallmar82 , Clubbinseals , dv8
10
I am a female
xOhxSoxScandalousx , Kitka , Ryuson , Beck , js250 , Sohotdinosaur , pootpootpoot , PropertyOfPotter , Missmarc , Annemarie , Ansley , haley730 , Gracie , kkross65 , Ms. N , Rin (aka Nire) , Raigne , Sammi , Secret Pleasure , Rossie , Mwar , Ilovelingerie , KyotoAngel , CindyH , MissBre , poetprincess , anonkitty , MamaDivine , Miss Anonymous , unfulfilled , ViVix , DustBunny , Jake'n'bake , Emerlyn , chicmichiw
35
I wouldn't pay for their meals. It is my special day.
Ciao. , xOhxSoxScandalousx , Kitka , Ryuson , Beck , Sohotdinosaur , PropertyOfPotter , Missmarc , haley730 , kkross65 , Secret Pleasure , Rossie , CindyH , MissBre , poetprincess , BlooJay , MamaDivine , Stagger13 , Miss Anonymous , Clubbinseals , Emerlyn , chicmichiw
22
I would pay for their meals if they NEEDED me to. But I wont pay for everyone, it's my special day!
Beck , haley730 , MistressDandelion , Mwar , married with children , GONE! , unfulfilled , ViVix , Hallmar82 , Clubbinseals , Emerlyn , chicmichiw
12
I would pay for meals. It's the least I can do.
js250 , pootpootpoot , Annemarie , Ansley , Gracie , Ms. N , Rin (aka Nire) , Raigne , Sammi , DiamondKoala , Miss Anonymous , DustBunny , Jake'n'bake
13
My choice is due to my upbringing (ex: Romanian tradition)
Annemarie
1
My choice is personal. It's how I feel.
Ciao. , Kitka , Ryuson , Beck , js250 , Sohotdinosaur , pootpootpoot , Missmarc , leanright69 , Rin (aka Nire) , Tork48309 , Raigne , MistressDandelion , Rossie , DiamondKoala , MissBre , GONE! , anonkitty , BlooJay , MamaDivine , Miss Anonymous , unfulfilled , DustBunny , Jake'n'bake
24
My choice is... Hell, I don't know! That's just how it is!
Ansley , MamaDivine , ViVix
3
Other
Ilovelingerie , KyotoAngel , anonkitty , dv8
4
I don't have a Birthday. O.o
Ms. N , MistressDandelion
2
Snail ^.^
Kitka , Clubbinseals , Jake'n'bake
3
Total votes: 129 (47 voters)
Poll is closed
04/11/2012
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Contributor: Ciao. Ciao.
Personally if I went out to eat with friends for my birthday I would expect that they would pay for their portion of the meal (with only a handful of exceptions), but it wouldn't particularly bother me if someone else who was celebrating a birthday offered to pay for my portion of a meal. I think it just comes down to where you are at money-wise and how comfortable you are with handling these sorts of situations. I know if I was significantly wealthier I wouldn't think twice about paying for my friends' meals, but as is I think we all know that we're in a similar position so everybody just pays their own way for the most part.
04/11/2012
Contributor: xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
If it is my birthday, why on earth would I pay for their meals? If my friend asked me and a few of her friends out to dinner on her birthday, I would expect her friends and I to split the birthday girls meal cost. If they didn't offer to split the cost of her meal then I would gladly pay for her meal myself.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Kitka Kitka
I typically don't have enough money to take myself out let alone pay for others, so nope, I wouldn't pay for their meals on my birthday. Any other time, if I had some extra cash? Sure thing!
04/11/2012
Contributor: Ryuson Ryuson
I think that I should pay for my own meal and they should pay for their own meals! That's just me, though.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
It would depend. If they only way my friend could come is if I paid for them, then yes I would, but usually I expect those to pay for themselves. I usually don't go out for such occasions. It is easier to have dinner at home and cook or order for delivery.
04/11/2012
Contributor: js250 js250
If it is agreed beforehand that the invitee is paying and you still go, you have also agreed to let them pay for your meals. Sometimes people can get great pleasure from being able to treat others. I do whenever I have had the money to treat.
04/11/2012
Contributor: xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
If it is agreed beforehand that the invitee is paying and you still go, you have also agreed to let them pay for your meals. Sometimes people can get great pleasure from being able to treat others. I do whenever I have had the money to treat.
Very true!
04/11/2012
Contributor: pootpootpoot pootpootpoot
I always pay for my friends when we go out for my birthday. For special occasions, I like to go somewhere fancy, and as some of my friends are in tough financial situations right now the only way they could come is if I paid! I don't mind, because I want to spend that time with them, and they're already spending money on my presents.
04/11/2012
Contributor: PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
I wouldn't pay for it
04/11/2012
Contributor: Missmarc Missmarc
Honestly I think the procedure goes that you give the person gift, and then they have a birthday party/dinner. The gift is suppose to worth way more than the food.
04/11/2012
Contributor: lacybutton lacybutton
If your friends really wanted to treat everyone for their birthday, especially because it was part of their ethnic tradition, why not? It's their birthday, they can pay if they want to.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Annemarie Annemarie
I was always taught the person who invites the other(s) pays (i.e. "I'd love it if you came to have dinner!"). It's like hosting a party. Do you expect people to pay for their own food? The drinks they drink? No, of course not, that's ridiculous.

However, if it ends up being a joint decision (i.e. A: "We should do dinner!" B: "Yeah, we should!"), then it's every man for themselves.

It's a subtle nuance.

I, personally, think it's ungracious to have shoved the money in her purse later. Different strokes.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
The key word here is "invite". If you invite someone out, especially if it's something celebrating yourself, then the traditional thing to do is cover the bill for everyone. Within reason. You don't have to buy their drinks, but the meal should be covered by you and they should chip in to pay for your entree/drinks/dessert. That's how we roll in the South, anyway.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Gracie Gracie
If it is my Bithday party then I see myself as the hostess. I invited the people I enjoy, I choose the resturant and I expect to pay for the meal. If however someone says let's all go out and celebrate, I expect us all to get our own bill. Or if someone says I want to take you out, then I expect them to pay. It all depends on how the plans were made. I am always prepared to get my own bill just incase I missunderstood. Sometimes letting someone else pay is giving them a great gift and showing respect.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Ms. N Ms. N
I agree...if I invited them to celebrate with me, I would plan on paying...but I wouldn't refuse assistance on the bill, if they wanted to help out. If they invited me out for my birthday, however, I would expect them to pay for me. I would still offer to pay, but I would expect to be refused.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
It depends on if I specifically invited them to a meal or if we just happened to be out on my birthday and we decided to stop. In the former case, if they really insisted on paying for themselves I'd let them, but otherwise I don't mind paying for my friends' meals if I have the money to. In the latter, I'd probably still help out if someone really needed it.

"To share food is to share life," as my dad once told me. I enjoy sharing food with my friends when I can. It makes me feel good.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Raigne Raigne
If *I* invited them, I would pay for it. If a family member was offering to buy dinner for whoever I wanted to invite, that's different, but I don't expect people to buy me gifts if they can't afford it, so I won't force them to pay to celebrate my birthday with me either. My gift is their presence.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
If I'm the one that invited them to dinner, then I would pay. It doesn't seem any different to me than when I have birthday parties for my kids - we invite, and whatever the activity is (rec center, movie, bowling, etc), we pay, since we invited.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Secret Pleasure Secret Pleasure
I would not pay its my day if anything they should pay for me just saying.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Mwar Mwar
I'm spoiled. I'd be prepared, but I wouldn't WANT to pay.
04/12/2012
Contributor: Ilovelingerie Ilovelingerie
Quote:
Originally posted by SecretToyLover2
And you personally invited 5 or 6 people out to dinner with you, would YOU pay for the meal? I have some good friends who invited me and three others out for their birthday (two days apart from each other, couple) and would not let me pay. They said ... more
It would really depend on the people and the situation
04/12/2012
Contributor: Ilovelingerie Ilovelingerie
Quote:
Originally posted by SecretToyLover2
And you personally invited 5 or 6 people out to dinner with you, would YOU pay for the meal? I have some good friends who invited me and three others out for their birthday (two days apart from each other, couple) and would not let me pay. They said ... more
What a coincidence, its my birthday! lol
04/12/2012
Contributor: DiamondKoala DiamondKoala
I would make an attempt to pay at the very least and try to take the check but if it is clearly an important issue to the birthday person or someone really wants to pay then I would oblige.
04/12/2012
Contributor: KyotoAngel KyotoAngel
I chose other, I don't usually do the whole going out for a birthday dinner thing. We usually wind up getting fast food of some sort and cake but I think if I did invite people (there would be maybe three of them including my mom) I would pay their portion of the bill too if I could.
04/12/2012
Contributor: CindyH CindyH
i chose no it is my special daythey should invite me and pay
04/12/2012
Contributor: married with children married with children
I would expect people to pay for their own meals, unless they were hard up.
04/14/2012
Contributor: poetprincess poetprincess
Quote:
Originally posted by SecretToyLover2
And you personally invited 5 or 6 people out to dinner with you, would YOU pay for the meal? I have some good friends who invited me and three others out for their birthday (two days apart from each other, couple) and would not let me pay. They said ... more
I have not had a good birthday in years so this year I am, but I would let someone pay for my meal on my day but I would not pay for anyone else s
04/14/2012
Contributor: anonkitty anonkitty
I've never let my friends pay for their meals on their birthday and they've never let me on mine. The one exception was that it was a combination of celebrations and I got them a present as opposed to paying for their dinner (still paid for my own though).
04/14/2012
Contributor: BlooJay BlooJay
I wouldn't pay for other people's meals on my birthday. If it is someone else's birthday, I would offer to buy their meal though.
04/14/2012