The New Intimacy

Do you believe that viewing porn is emotional cheating?

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Contributor: butterflygirlxo butterflygirlxo
General Question
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Yes
Harlequin , StephieBoo02 , bayosgirl , SexyStuff , Ilovelingerie , AU , sexystuffeve , PropertyOfPotter , geekchic , meitman
10  (3%)
No
Kim! , Alicia , Avant-garde , DeliciousSurprise , ToyTimeTim , Persephone Nightmare , ridgeley , Airen Wolf , Jobthingy , Madeira , Kinky Skier , Mr. E , Pleasure Piratess , ~LaUr3n~ , P'Gell , Lady Venus , SexYnCute Couple , Selective Sensualist , MyDolceVita , petite-n-sweet , Sir , Sidewinder , sexysweetieshan , PassionQT , Love Buzz , Liz2 , Waterfall , El-Jaro , Viktor Vysheslav Malkin , SexyySarah , mllebeauty , Kindred , gone77 , jakjak , Jul!a , Sammi , clp , Tuesday , RadRach , omgmegg , Fanny , iceman681 , Trashley , Shellz31 , Envy , sweet sally , Blinker , razmataz , namelesschaos , mrs.mckrakn , EndlessFrost , ToyGeek , Adriana Ravenlust , Onanist , K-smith , Sohotdinosaur , sextoygeek , tits only , soulrain , SunshineKT , newbern2004 , Persephone's Addiction , flamefire , darthkitt3n , Emma (Girl With Fire) , Teaser , leatherlover , LavenderSkies , Tart , Qliq , Alan & Michele , LikeSunshineDust , SexyTabby , bunny love , lamira , rdytogo , Lummox , MattBryant , Redboxbaby , Eliza , Coralbell , Rckt56 , Jessica Elizabeth , Porfiriato , married with children , popples , just a sub , Lady Neshamah , Lucidity , meganthomas , KnK , Danielle1220 , mariah , Airekah , UnknownGirl , bambithummper69 , PussyGalore , TiffyPixie , sbon , C4ss , misslady , moonch1ld , lemony , Mistress Kitty , VenusianThunder , Orion , RonLee , cnspots , Josh aka FootMan , Lurr , kittychilla , REDRUM , Kinkypixie , jankit , NaughtyButterfly , CPTInsanity , BBW Talks Toys , Mr.RightNow , dhig , markeagleone , Hadespark , 34 , BadassFatass , I Wear The Pants , BurritoBabe , lovebugg , Gunsmoke , shelly8791 , Keegski , RubberDuckie , Taylor Von , BeautiFullFigured , toxie m , joja , Lady Marmelade , Pixel , Adam02viper , Nathan von Minden , Cats Meow , the other jo , ZapperZepper , cobiffle , slynch , lkb , SiNn , tomservo1028 , Lilbee , PinkPedal , Joie de Cherresse , sexyintexas , Yebby , cec578 , cburger , BluePixi , beautiful , Lithaewyn , LaBellaVita1982 , callsignhusker , Ansley , PersonalAngel , Fuck it. , lick123 , BlueDog , Erotica Explorer , Kynky Kytty , lisa1 , froggiemoma , zracer , GravyCakes , Wondermom , Apirka , coconut1 , Breas , Lily Night , deltalima , Silverdrop , Jake'n'bake , Modern^Spank^Anthem , solita , HannahPanda , Kitka , unfulfilled , melissa1973 , Lover of Leather , mm098 , ksparkles16 , Ice1 , MaiNai , All His , PurpleReign , BlooJay , Hallmar82 , Ahatmadeofshoes12 , jokerzwild , Kush , oneeyedoctopus , Hibangel , GirlOnGirl , Harpina is gone , Mwar , CoffeeCup , Bignuf , Swish , Kithara , Zombirella , Subska , indiglo , Rahel , dragonn , dbm6907 , caligaliber , rom323 , Rin (aka Nire) , Voir , Nazaress , Sinfully , C-Rae , ejrbrndps , Graniteal , Lizzy , Gone (LD29) , BiJess , catsin , delta117 , breebree , ellejay , pitona , pootpootpoot , squire , lilys , thisisadeletedaccount , Stinkytofu10 , friendswithfangs , LennaKieran , haley730 , elli , ViVix , pasdechat , potstickers , ginainohio , Princess Zelda , mammas place , pokefan15 , Kitten has left the site , AlleyKitten , Midway through , Intrepid Niddering , tortilla , Amber Sweet , twelve13 , doowop , earthmama , jr2012 , zaftigzoo , hillys , ChubbyNerd , CutiePatootie , MrWood , mdnght , TJtheMadHatter , BrittaniMaree , <3BF , EastCoast36 , raffi , Geogeo , wicked weasel , MrWill , U3H , BigDawg , JDear , SP , gorgeous , IamKC , GONE! , FieryRed , Rossie , sunflower , mpfm , Syrus , Trysexual , HB042 , Isola , karenm , brandi2009 , MissyKitty , TheirPet , joolie , surreptitious , SecretKinksters , evie.amor , butts , KrissyNovacaine , lauraxxarual , mr115393 , MissCatastrophe
295  (97%)
Total votes: 305
Poll is closed
09/19/2010
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Contributor: Avant-garde Avant-garde
porn is just a fantasy. If you count a fantasy as cheating then were all cheaters.
09/19/2010
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
For us cheating involves touching.
09/19/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by butterflygirlxo
General Question
Absolutely not. Emotional cheating is cheating your partner(s) of an emotional connection or experience. The most that watching porn does is cheat your partner(s) out of time or a sexual connection. Usually a person doesn't become emotionally invested in a porn video.
09/19/2010
Contributor: Jobthingy Jobthingy
I have known people in the past that have viewed it this way and I never understood why.

and heck! If that was the case I am a chronic cheater
09/19/2010
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
For us cheating involves touching.
For me (us) cheating involves something attainable. So watching porn with people you don't know and never will...isn't cheating emotionally or physically.
09/19/2010
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
No. No more than watching a "chick flick" or romantic comedy is.

Porn is fantasy, fantasy isn't cheating. Also, as many people become aroused while watching porn and/or reading erotica, it often will benefit your partner, as then you will be more interested in sex, and more ready to engage in sex.

Also, I think watching porn with one's partner is a good way to become aroused together as well as get ideas of fun, new things to try. Even if you don't try what you watched, it's fun and gets both of you in the mood.
09/19/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
No, I do not find it to be cheating. Doesn't necessarily make it the best thing, if avoiding the partner happens or the person becomes addicted to porn and ignores their lover.
09/20/2010
Contributor: PassionQT PassionQT
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
No, I do not find it to be cheating. Doesn't necessarily make it the best thing, if avoiding the partner happens or the person becomes addicted to porn and ignores their lover.
That's how I feel about it, but even if it became an addiction, I still wouldn't call that cheating. Cheating to me means with another person and behind your partner's back, but it varies from person to person. I have heard of some that felt porn was cheating or a betrayal of sorts. Didn't some woman in NY just kill her husband because she caught him watching porn?
09/20/2010
Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
We don't watch porn behind each others backs and we sometimes watch porn together. Our tastes vary. My b/f knows I enjoy g/g porn during solo play and doesn't feel cheated on. His feeling is as long as I have something for left for him!
09/20/2010
Contributor: Alicia Alicia
I don't find it to be cheating but if the other partner isn't ok with it then I do see watching it as problematic.
09/20/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by PassionQT
That's how I feel about it, but even if it became an addiction, I still wouldn't call that cheating. Cheating to me means with another person and behind your partner's back, but it varies from person to person. I have heard of some that ... more
The cheating part would be if the addict admits there is a problem and says they will get help...and then doesn't. It's still the addiction cycle rather than cheating but I'll be honest, it feels the same.
09/20/2010
Contributor: Viktor Vysheslav Malkin Viktor Vysheslav Malkin
Quote:
Originally posted by butterflygirlxo
General Question
That is a BIG no for me, thank you
09/20/2010
Contributor: SexyySarah SexyySarah
Nope! We watch it together and apart, not considered cheating here!
09/20/2010
Contributor: mllebeauty mllebeauty
In my eyes, cheating is something outside the parameters we've agreed upon. We love porn, together and apart!
09/20/2010
Contributor: gone77 gone77
Nope. I believe watching porn together can be a great addition to a sexy health life. Heck, even viewing it separately is healthy as long as it doesn't interfere with the couple's sex life and/or relationship.
09/20/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Neither of us consider watching porn to be cheating and so long as one isn't picking porn over actual interaction, we both encourage the other to watch. He's still getting used to not getting crap for watching porn since he spent about 3 years in a relationship with someone who didn't want him to watch porn because she didn't want him to be aroused by women other than her. But if it's just watching and you're never going to meet said porn stars, it's not cheating.
09/20/2010
Contributor: sarahbear sarahbear
Technically it's not cheating, but if you and your partner have discussed it and it's something they've asked you not to do then it isn't okay to do it.
09/20/2010
Contributor: clp clp
Definitely not, but if someone feels jealous over it, it is time for a serious discussion--regardless of whether it is cheating or not.
09/20/2010
Contributor: iceman681 iceman681
talk about your one sided answer
09/20/2010
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
I'm not sure if "emotional cheating" is what you're after - there is such a thing as an emotional affair where another person takes the place of the spouse in emotional intimacy but not sexually.
09/20/2010
Contributor: Trashley Trashley
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
Absolutely not. Emotional cheating is cheating your partner(s) of an emotional connection or experience. The most that watching porn does is cheat your partner(s) out of time or a sexual connection. Usually a person doesn't become emotionally ... more
This. This. This, this this!! ^^
09/23/2010
Contributor: Envy Envy
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
Absolutely not. Emotional cheating is cheating your partner(s) of an emotional connection or experience. The most that watching porn does is cheat your partner(s) out of time or a sexual connection. Usually a person doesn't become emotionally ... more
^ This. I agree with this. Porn is not cheating, it's fantasy. Being with an actual person and having an affair is cheating.
09/23/2010
Contributor: butterflygirlxo butterflygirlxo
Yes I agree with all of you! Porn is just a fantasy and I don't consider it cheating! Now if my partner was watching porn with another women I might have some issues there! I was just wondaring though because I have a few friends who consider it cheating and they think that it is wrong for there man to watch porn, I see nothing wrong with it!
09/23/2010
Contributor: namelesschaos namelesschaos
To me saying that watching porn is cheating on a partner would be like saying I cheated on my diet because I watched the food network (food porn). But if it causes problems or is something you agreed not to do in your relationship it should still be avoided of course.
09/25/2010
Contributor: mrs.mckrakn mrs.mckrakn
porn is for pure entertainment
10/03/2010
Contributor: mrs.mckrakn mrs.mckrakn
Quote:
Originally posted by namelesschaos
To me saying that watching porn is cheating on a partner would be like saying I cheated on my diet because I watched the food network (food porn). But if it causes problems or is something you agreed not to do in your relationship it should still be ... more
ha ha ..food porn..
10/03/2010
Contributor: ToyGeek ToyGeek
If I had a partner, and that partner had issues with porn, and I therefore had to be sneaky to watch it, I would probably feel guilty about it, but I don't think I'd apply the label 'cheating' to it.

I recently read something about a woman who thought she had cheated on her husband because she masturbated while he was suffering from long-term incapacitation, and I could not wrap my mind around that logic at all.
10/03/2010
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by namelesschaos
To me saying that watching porn is cheating on a partner would be like saying I cheated on my diet because I watched the food network (food porn). But if it causes problems or is something you agreed not to do in your relationship it should still be ... more
Hahaahah. My Man and I call the Food Network "Food Porn." We always get SO hungry we can't stand it when watching. Shortly after we got cable, we discovered the Food Network and one day, as we were munching on cookies and chips while watching I said, "This is like porn....for our tummies."

Great word.
10/03/2010
Contributor: wondertoes wondertoes
I think it probably depends on the couple and the person, but I wouldn't call it emotional cheating since there isn't an emotional connection.
10/12/2010