Have you ever been cheating?

Have you ever been cheating?

Lena Eden Lena Eden
Have you fantasized about various erotic scenarios that involve someone other than your current partner?

Perhaps you've taken things a step further, and you're in the midst of a flirtation with someone, or you've even been exchanging sexually charged emails or text messages?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
5  (23%)
1  (5%)
8  (36%)
8  (36%)
Total votes: 22
Poll is open
Feb 24, 8:05 am
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OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
A Ha, I once caught OW "cheating" on me. Fortunately I got her out of his car before they did anything. Came out good at the end though. We made passionate love all nite long She was so thrilled to see me so jealous.

btw, is oogling pretty weather gals /women or gals at the gym in their tight yoga outfits cheating ? If so then yes I am.

Oh, had to edit my post, just read the part about "Have you fantasized about various erotic scenarios that involve someone other than your current partner? "

I'm guilty of that just the other night. I will admit, it was very exciting. ntw, I won't do it again..
Feb 24, 7:15 pm
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by Lena Eden
Have you fantasized about various erotic scenarios that involve someone other than your current partner?

Perhaps you've taken things a step further, and you're in the midst of a flirtation with someone, or you've even been ...
I cant really picture cheating on my boyfriend. lol I'm weird but he is the only person I have ever been with. I don't like the idea of cheating, worry about possible scenarios of him cheating on me all the time and I know he has exes who cheated on him big time. I knew of that when we got together so I sort of promised myself I was gonna be the keeper, the good one. He is older and the sex between the two of us is not perfect. But I am not with him because I need him for that. sex with him in my opinion is validation that he is happy and wants me around and likes what I do for him. the problem with that is that he is at an age, he has outgrown the "recreational sex" age when I have not. He only seems to want it every now and then. Sometimes I try to instigate it and it works and we have sex and he seems happy. sometimes I try to instigate it and he just isn't interested. If I pressure him I risk sounding like an emasculating shrew so I don't push anymore. The things I enjoy are best kept to myself. I used to try to include him in those but he just wasn't into it and asking him for help just made me feel icky. So when I get to do something for him, him letting me do so is rewarding. If I get real excited and need to have some fun, I take time for myself and keep it out of his way. lol We are strange people and we click in many other ways that make us happy.
Feb 24, 9:02 pm
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by GingerMeggie
I cant really picture cheating on my boyfriend. lol I'm weird but he is the only person I have ever been with. I don't like the idea of cheating, worry about possible scenarios of him cheating on me all the time and I know he has exes who ...
Why not start a thread asking for ways to get the bf into more sex ? I'm sure there are some experts here. I heard of supplements that may help. Or google how to get my man more .....

I guess he doesn't get excited from watch adult videos either ?

I heard supplements like L Arginine, Horny Goat Weed, Maca Root powder etc can help. And oysters.

btw, do you have a wand ?
Feb 24, 10:01 pm
RonLee RonLee
A little bit more than nine years ago, I asked a particular person to be "The Other Woman". She wouldn't. If she had, I wouldn't have felt the need to initiate a divorce from my first wife.
Feb 24, 11:34 pm
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
A little bit more than nine years ago, I asked a particular person to be "The Other Woman". She wouldn't. If she had, I wouldn't have felt the need to initiate a divorce from my first wife.
sounds like the divorce was needed unless the wife at the time was ok with you boinking other people. lol its only my opinion but unless its a mutual agreement, one should probably not go looking for an extramarital affair before considering a separation or divorce...again, only my opinion, there are at least 2 sides to every story...
Feb 25, 1:42 am
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Why not start a thread asking for ways to get the bf into more sex ? I'm sure there are some experts here. I heard of supplements that may help. Or google how to get my man more .....

I guess he doesn't get excited from watch adult ...
... he gets very defensive if I bring up trying to use help. I would have suggested talking to a doctor about things of that sort a while ago when I started thinking about it. there was the phase where nothing was good in bed and I mostly accepted it cuz I thought that was how he saw me. then there was a brief phase where I was attempting to speak up about it and try to show him I was interested in doing something about it. That just caused problems: he is touchy and doesn't like to talk about it and gets very defensive because if I say something its like I'm putting him down. I got my first toy a couple years ago and sort of did it behind his back. then when we were trying to talk about it more and it became the cause of arguments, I told him I had a couple toys and we both kind of hinted at him trying to play with me... by the time the toys came out in bed, he was already done and had no interest in staying in bed. we even tried starting with toys. that did not last long because he would just get frustrated and take over. took me forever to get comfortable with him manning the controls figuratively and he seemed so bored and uncomfortable and unhappy I could not keep asking him to try it. its not his thing to have fun with toys with me and its a very sore subject to suggest he try doing something to enhance his performance. I got very tired of being made to feel like the bad guy. Sex with him when he is up for it makes him happy and that makes me happy. what I enjoy aside from that is solo play. If I try to get his attention too much then I am told I am being pushy and he is tired.
And no. Have yet to try a wand... they look weird compared to dildos and other vibes and I am not certain how people use them.
Feb 25, 1:59 am
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Why not start a thread asking for ways to get the bf into more sex ? I'm sure there are some experts here. I heard of supplements that may help. Or google how to get my man more .....

I guess he doesn't get excited from watch adult ...
at one point I was even trying to read a little bit about what can help men or cause an issue with how long they last and one of the points being made frequently was that having that happen for a little while can cause anxiety about it happening more and the anxiety itself can contribute to making it worse. In the midst of one argument spurred on by trying to talk about it I told him I had read that and did not want to be the cause of his anxiety and did not want to take all the fun out of it for him. He even apologized for cumming fast once and I had to stop him and tell him never to apologize for having an orgasm again cuz its not supposed to be like that. One does not apologize for having an orgasm. I don't apologize when I spend an afternoon at home alone having a good time. lol I try to be nice about it. I like him and I like when he's happy. I am not out to cut him down.
Feb 25, 2:11 am
RonLee RonLee
Quote:
Originally posted by GingerMeggie
sounds like the divorce was needed unless the wife at the time was ok with you boinking other people. lol its only my opinion but unless its a mutual agreement, one should probably not go looking for an extramarital affair before considering a ...
I'll cut the telling of this way way down and just say...

Wife#1 was mentally ill but would not accept treatment. That's the awful part of mental illness, the ill person does not believe that they need help.

Wife#1 and I had a young son. I could go into it much more in depth (including the sexual frustration of me having a very high sex drive and her not nearly as much interest) but that would be even more of a downer than the rest of what I'm gonna tell now. Other than to say, I stayed in the marriage as long as I could to be the lightning rod for Wife#1's craziness so she would not direct it to the child.

When her treatment of me finally resulted in depression and I was contemplating my own suicide rather than continue to live with her abuse, I did initiate divorce. It was extremely painful emotionally for everyone involved. If I could have done so I would have happily gone back to active duty army and stayed in combat until I was no more, instead of the divorce.

Before the divorce was complete Wife#1 was diagnosed with cancer. I stopped the divorce so that she would remain on my health insurance and recover but she did not recover. Many of my friends and family told me that she was getting what she deserved but I still could not hate her. She had no family or friends to help her when the cancer got bad, so I did. She was at home and a hospice chaplain and I were with her when she died.

Looking at the situation from the hindsight perspective (which isn't often helpful) If the "Other Woman" had been in the picture, I would have been much more able to maintain the facade of being a loving husband to Wife#1 until she died and save her so much emotional pain. Even though cognitively I know that it isn't true, I still feel that everything was my fault and I will carry that regret for the rest of my own life.
Feb 25, 9:27 am
mikeysPlace mikeysPlace
Wow, RonLee. Wow.

Your commitment and loyalty to wife #1 are beyond reproach to me. Kudos.
Feb 25, 9:58 am
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
I'll cut the telling of this way way down and just say...

Wife#1 was mentally ill but would not accept treatment. That's the awful part of mental illness, the ill person does not believe that they need help.

Wife#1 and I ...
let me get this straight: you really think it would have caused an already mentally and terminally physically ill woman LESS PAIN if you had been boinking someone else on the side while she lay suffering through her last days?! It may have helped you maintain your composure better and could have helped you to stay strong but you weren't ultimately the one that needed the moral support the most: you have the rest of your life to heal. Your first wife, however crazy she may have been, was honestly dying. I would have thought that the greatest support for her would have been knowing that the man she ran ragged and put through hell still had the decency to stand by her and see the real end of her life and the relationship through. But I also understand that cancer is horrible, watching someone live, suffer and die in that way is terrible, and everyone has their own needs and ways to maintain their own sanity in the face of death. So it still doesn't seem fair to call you a pig. and this is why :
something I never told anyone: before I left with my boyfriend, I was taking care of my mom. She was a co dependent drunk and conned all of her kids into taking care of her at some point or another. I was paying her rent and buying her groceries because she said and did things that made me feel I owed it to her but I had no place to live myself and had been sleeping in a cemetery off and on since I was in highschool... My brother in law finally decided to move mom out of the tiny apartment when she got drunk while I was working one night and fell and hit her head. I was the one that found her after she fell. I had gone to pick up her groceries and had asked my boss to let me leave work early before the store closed. When I walked into the room that night she was on the floor so still. I didn't do anything for a moment and just stared at her because first I wondered and then I sort of almost hoped that she would be dead. I was tired and I didn't want anything bad for her but all the worrying about her and taking care of her and watching her drown would have been over if she was dead. She wasn't. But I had a sick moment when I wondered and then hoped. I wouldn't want someone to call me a pig or a jerk for thinking that way when I was so tired and was trying so hard and no one else cared. I know its not the same situation as yours was but the feeling is relatable. No one needs to be called selfish when things are that bad. your view is warped but I couldn't hate you for it.
Feb 25, 10:14 am
RonLee RonLee
Quote:
Originally posted by GingerMeggie
let me get this straight: you really think it would have caused an already mentally and terminally physically ill woman LESS PAIN if you had been boinking someone else on the side while she lay suffering through her last days?! It may have helped you ...
GingerMeggie, you missed or I was not detailed enough about the timeline. I would NOT have told Wife#1 that I was seeing the Other Woman. Being with the Other Woman would have enabled me to NOT divorce... at least not for a while.

Wife#1 did not have or at least had not been diagnosed with cancer when I was seeing the Other Woman. I initiated divorce before she was diagnosed with cancer and stopped the divorce from proceeding when I became aware of her medical situation.

The aspect of hindsight... had I been able to see into the future and know that Wife#1 would be ill and then die 27 months after I initiated divorce, I would not have done so, nor would I have cheated. However, I could not see into that future.

I applaud you GingerMeggie for helping your mother for as long as you did. I imagine that if she is still alive you still help her in some ways.

I am no longer a "believer" but IF it turns out that there is an almighty god, he should apologize for the pain he has put ALL of US through.
Feb 25, 10:39 am
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
GingerMeggie, you missed or I was not detailed enough about the timeline. I would NOT have told Wife#1 that I was seeing the Other Woman. Being with the Other Woman would have enabled me to NOT divorce... at least not for a while.

Wife#1 ...
lmao I don't believe in god either. And I did not realize you had actually cheated on her. You kind of made it sound like you tried to but did not. Still can't really judge when I stop myself and consider how hard it must have been to be in such a bad situation. It is commendable you stopped the divorce and returned to help. I may never cheat but I have already done plenty of awful things before so if there happens to be a god, I am resigned to being doomed to hell. The only problem with that is that If there were a god and I got sent to hell, I would actually belong somewhere for once. I don't think I will be so lucky rotfl. My drunk mom is still alive. We tried to keep helping her. She didn't want help. She lives with my aunt who was newly divorced at the time. My mom drinks and takes pills all day while the aunts at work. She saves face by doing all the housework she can manage and hides the booze. I moved to Texas for a short time when I left and family in Iowa were telling me I needed to spend money I did not have to go back over the first xmas I was gone to baby sit her. I am in the Illinois area now. I am roughly 3 hours away from where my mom and siblings all live. Most of the siblings don't speak accept separately to me. most siblings including myself ignore the mom. Life is easier that way and we're all degenerates.
Feb 25, 11:11 am
Lena Eden Lena Eden
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
A Ha, I once caught OW "cheating" on me. Fortunately I got her out of his car before they did anything. Came out good at the end though. We made passionate love all nite long She was so thrilled to see me so jealous.

btw, is ...
Wow! You can not answer my question if you don't want to, but anyway.. Did you fantasize about OW and another woman?
Feb 28, 10:38 am
Lena Eden Lena Eden
GingerMeggie & RonLee, guys I think that we all have had our 'difficult times' stories. And you both seem to be brave people and there is no sense in judging anyone in this world, as whatever happens, it's all for the best.

Thanks for being so open and I wish there will always be lots of positive moments in your lives!
Feb 28, 11:07 am
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by Lena Eden
GingerMeggie & RonLee, guys I think that we all have had our 'difficult times' stories. And you both seem to be brave people and there is no sense in judging anyone in this world, as whatever happens, it's all for the best. ...
Sorry all. I can be a really bitter person. I will try harder not to flood anyone's discussions with such bitterness. Was way off topic and uncalled for. My apologies I did not mean to offend anyone.
Feb 28, 1:32 pm
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by Lena Eden
Wow! You can not answer my question if you don't want to, but anyway.. Did you fantasize about OW and another woman?
answer is yes, but didn't get far. They couldn't agree who was going to be on top.
Feb 28, 5:28 pm
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by GingerMeggie
Sorry all. I can be a really bitter person. I will try harder not to flood anyone's discussions with such bitterness. Was way off topic and uncalled for. My apologies I did not mean to offend anyone.
5 wacks on the buttocks for you, young lady .
No, just kidding.
Feb 28, 5:48 pm
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
5 wacks on the buttocks for you, young lady .
No, just kidding.
rotfl meh I can dream can't I.
Feb 28, 9:49 pm
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
answer is yes, but didn't get far. They couldn't agree who was going to be on top.
did you try picturing them sideways? lol
Feb 28, 9:50 pm
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by GingerMeggie
did you try picturing them sideways? lol
No, they are both toppers and insist on going first.
Mar 3, 11:22 am
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by GingerMeggie
rotfl meh I can dream can't I.
Remember dreams can come true
Mar 3, 11:23 am
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
No, they are both toppers and insist on going first.
bahahahahaha awww. seems they should both appreciate the challenge... standing up maybe?...
Mar 3, 11:52 am
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by GingerMeggie
bahahahahaha awww. seems they should both appreciate the challenge... standing up maybe?...
But doesn't solve problem of who gets to use her dick first. That's the issue. Both are strong dominant women and accustomed to having their way.

And then there's still the question of will they allow me to watch. Of course it's already established I'll have to clean up after they are done.
Mar 3, 12:00 pm
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
But doesn't solve problem of who gets to use her dick first. That's the issue. Both are strong dominant women and accustomed to having their way.

And then there's still the question of will they allow me to watch. Of course ...
just use something double ended? you cleaning up is leverage for being allowed to watch. if youre not allowed to watch why should you clean up?
Mar 3, 12:08 pm
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
But doesn't solve problem of who gets to use her dick first. That's the issue. Both are strong dominant women and accustomed to having their way.

And then there's still the question of will they allow me to watch. Of course ...
whos dick is bigger if either is? you could go that way. or convince them to compete for top somehow. they could just wrassle till someone got it in first.
Mar 3, 12:16 pm
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by GingerMeggie
just use something double ended? you cleaning up is leverage for being allowed to watch. if youre not allowed to watch why should you clean up?
Lol, if you and the bf get into pegging, you'll understand. You will be surprised and happy with your new found power.
Mar 3, 3:55 pm
OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
Quote:
Originally posted by GingerMeggie
whos dick is bigger if either is? you could go that way. or convince them to compete for top somehow. they could just wrassle till someone got it in first.
Lol, I should go order her a new larger dildo then. She won't accept being second. I know that first hand.
Mar 3, 3:58 pm
GingerMeggie GingerMeggie
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
Lol, I should go order her a new larger dildo then. She won't accept being second. I know that first hand.
Bahahahaha that is awesome.
Mar 3, 6:28 pm
RonLee RonLee
Quote:
Originally posted by Lena Eden
GingerMeggie & RonLee, guys I think that we all have had our 'difficult times' stories. And you both seem to be brave people and there is no sense in judging anyone in this world, as whatever happens, it's all for the best. ...
An aside... the "Other Woman" from way back then, who declined becoming a regular FWB, although her and I did get together for a while before I learned Wife#1 was terminal. The Other Woman's reasoning I cannot fault, she was/is a person of exemplary character. She is, recently now back in my life as a friend (not FWB) with my current Wife's full knowledge. That is what I consider to be a very positive development.
Mar 4, 9:18 am
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