No sex until marriage or sex before and after marriage

Contributor: AngelicaU AngelicaU 03/23/2011

I'm looking to see who believes in sex only after after you're married and who doesn't mind and goes for it before marriage. Do you think it really matters, do you strictly have a belief in waiting till after, just share your thoughts and beliefs on it.

Invited: All users.

Discussion Topics

1.
Contributor: AngelicaU AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Waterfall , Keegski , Coralbell , Tidwtrguy , LavenderSkies , Lolla Munz , BadassFatass , PiratePrincess , potstickers , zracer , toxie m , Lummox , ellejay , Sammi , Joie de Cherresse , cectru , A Closet Slut (aka nipplepeople) , beautiful , Lithaewyn , rdytogo , Purpleducklings , SugarAndSpice , Alan & Michele , Shellz31 , namelesschaos , pinkcupcakes , Adam02viper , REDRUM , SirTouchAlot , Rossie , Miss T , darthkitt3n , slynch , ~LaUr3n~ , SexyTabby , ToyTimeTim , aBeastlyLittleThing , Love&War , bunny love , Kindred , Fuck it. , liilii080 , Tori Rebel , KunisCarrot , DCorrelle , link82 , *HisMrs* , Carolinagirl08 , Lily Night , Willis2011 , NarcissisticLust , oopsy , barrettbn2 , chidoll , Madeira , Andromeda , Airen Wolf , Curves , MaryExy , 0 , K101 , sarki , mrs.mckrakn , BlueDog , Judas Iscars , Lady Venus , Kilgorescowboy , JPito , cobiffle , Howells , newfoundlust , kelaaa33wish , froggiemoma , Reyes , ichwillwaffels , k3 , Persephone Nightmare , CheerfulLoner , jzzrzz , evelyn , cujo467 , AOutrajus , The Curious Couple , meganthomas , ashaxmarie , Petite Valentine , starsNairguitars , LittleBoPeep , Anjulie , Novs , Mommy2 , kinksters , Nando , RomeroB , AgnesTrevejo , AdmNeg , UunicornN , Elias McLovin , |Scheibe| , Misfit Momma , Smitty , ~KillerQueen~ , Akira , RosesThorns , Rhazya , ichigostrawberry , Kiwidragon , C-Rae , SiNn , kokopelli , Inwitari , lovemuscle n cookie , ninaspinkturtle , Ansley , jay28 , ss143 , lanky , EnMH , Ms. Spice , TameTemptress , zeebot , CoffeeCup , CharlieBrown , aliceinthehole , Lakmé , gehuwd , thebest , Ivy Wilde , Acorn , Kim! , MJ1337 , Checkmate , js250 , Ghost , dezzydezire , bayosgirl , Lady Nina , EJ , daveysgirl , LaLaLouise , emiliaa , Valentinka , ToyGurl , systematicweasel , Kkay , P'Gell , Ava5 , Screen Door , ily , Beck , Kayla , cheetahpita , Breas , InNeedOfABuzzzz , Princess-Kayla ♥ , Starkiller87 , Lucky21 , IslandGoddess , cocomo , TheHardOne , mistressg , Love Perpetua , Jon S , unfulfilled , ScotchIrish , Diabolical Kitty , Errkam , eroticmutt , Bignuf , Peggi , GonetoLovehoney , Stagger13 , collifornia , *Ashley* , geliebt , jacki , voenne , HannahPanda , tlaskowski , (k)InkyIvy , aimtoplease , jedent , klyte , deletedacct , inmytoybox , Sinfully , Cherrylane , smashthepatriarchy , DeliciousSurprise , Envy , LovesAPoet , StarbucksAddict , Zombirella , switzerland , GONE! , pfoof , Undead , Claire de Cerises , 7Miles , Katelyn , wrmbreze , chantal coopette , Daemonin , Angewin , Fun with Dick & Jane , chantalgiardina , DreamWolf , Graniteal , Missmarc , PDXlady , Lady Bear , Nazaress , lokoum , Lano4ka , PeaceToTheMiddleEast , mlmac , Incendiaire , A.Mari , <3BF , oneeyedoctopus , AJvil , MissCandyland , samanthalynn , corsetsaurus rex , Lizzy , ksparkles16 , Stinkytofu10 , fredacarl , Secret Pleasure , Jake'n'bake , at193 , MamaDivine , Trepier , jmex83 , Brenard , Do emu , robertk2380 , calliope , romstomp , Lilith Bealove , underHim , xOhxSoxScandalousx , nanamondoute , AliMc , Jeanette , KRD , woodsdragon , PropertyOfPotter , Crimson Vixen , xilliannax , epiphanyjayne , booboo111926 , CadmiumKitty , kitty1949 , kizzl , Derpina , thisisadeletedaccount , Billie Bones , MistressDandelion , Femme Mystique , Cheluh10 , SkylarrStarr , Passionate Mandi , giftdgecko , xcapricax , Lildrummrgurl7 , dhig , J5ive , eeep , lilgrump , Deeder , Ouroborean , Rey , bedorerc , PassionCpl , tortilla , SMichelle , pirata , Lioncub , Rory , alayamae , Wonderstruck , SavingMyself , deltalima , jr2012 , edeneve , butts , nimr , smlove , lovebites , Harpina is gone , sugar&spikes , rockblenny , Alyxx , MidnightStorm , thePicklez , Cat E. , rom323 , Robespierrethecat , damnbul12 , hanjonatan , XxXxX , RememberMe , puglove , lilacviolet , Rraine , burtnuh , ginnyluvspotter , amplified to rock , Ice1 , captainsgirl , BrittaniMaree , Kitten has left the site , Gone (LD29) , cowgirl1130 , evie.amor , skittlezjoyann , Hummingbird , kkybf , ToyBunny , Flower1 , karenm , Kitt Katt , falalena , KayJay , novanilla , Munko , inkky , souviet , Nissa Nissa , bratcat , Qozt , hillys , Missy27 , chicmichiw , SecondStory , Silverwinds , Bleu , Britt93 , melliegirl , twelve13
341
Spilock , SexyStuff , GravyCakes , ddd masturbator(bye all!) , Wyo Daisy , daniel and frances , WhoopieDoo , ScottA , DiscretionAdvised , mack90 , konicaguy , Llahsram , lainebug
13
PiratePrincess , tffnyandrs , Dusk , Leila Eden , cherie2188 , *HisMrs* , Lily Night , Andromeda , 0 , SamsDelight , K101 , Retro , mrs.mckrakn , tickle me pink , Persephone Nightmare , AOutrajus , Maeby , starsNairguitars , EvilHomer , LittleBoPeep , ichigostrawberry , C-Rae , SiNn , ninaspinkturtle , Miss Anonymous , ThoughtsAblaze , MN58 , ss143 , Ms. Spice , aliceinthehole , beachluv51800 , Valentinka , ToyGurl , Ava5 , Princess-Kayla ♥ , domsub1993 , hyacinthgirl , Diabolical Kitty , Errkam , Bignuf , Chirple , Hallmar82 , her angelness , duff , Envy , Claire de Cerises , Daemonin , MeliPixie , Lady Bear , corsetsaurus rex , purple579 , Lilith Bealove , underHim , xOhxSoxScandalousx , SouthernBelle , PropertyOfPotter , Crimson Vixen , booboo111926 , MistressDandelion , Passionate Mandi , lilgrump , Deeder , deltalima , hhh , Kitten has left the site , kkybf , Shade , LoooveMonkey , lilyflower , Britt93
70
ColorMeCute , Llahsram
2
AngelicaU , Keegski , BadassFatass , toxie m , RonLee , dv8 , Solar Ray , Collodion , Joie de Cherresse , TheSinDoll , A Closet Slut (aka nipplepeople) , Lady Marmelade , Lithaewyn , rdytogo , SugarAndSpice , namelesschaos , callsignhusker , REDRUM , Rossie , aBeastlyLittleThing , HangsLikeCabbage , bunny love , Fuck it. , Cream in the Cupcake , Carolinagirl08 , MrRainybowbow , eggiweg , chidoll , Madeira , Airen Wolf , hornypoet69 , MaryExy , BlueDog , Lady Venus , xoflxokcxo , JPito , HouseWench , mandiegk , Howells , lolsos , Ratito , (Re)tired Stripper , Reyes , k3 , CheerfulLoner , np702 , meganthomas , uu , CAKES , kinksters , UunicornN , ichigostrawberry , Jazz , SiNn , Inwitari , curmudgeoncat , Ansley , jay28 , zeebot , CoffeeCup , hyperfemmepony , Kim! , MJ1337 , Ghost , dezzydezire , daveysgirl , emiliaa , Orion , P'Gell , Screen Door , ily , Beck , Kayla , InNeedOfABuzzzz , Starkiller87 , Lucky21 , mistressg , kellyg , unfulfilled , SaMiKaY , eroticmutt , GonetoLovehoney , collifornia , Mew , CreamySweet , geliebt , HannahPanda , aimtoplease , deletedacct , inmytoybox , Cherrylane , smashthepatriarchy , DeliciousSurprise , karay123 , Katelyn , wrmbreze , DreamWolf , PDXlady , Incendiaire , Rawr4483 , MissCandyland , hippie , Badass , asoutherngirl , Jake'n'bake , plaidvulva , Do emu , jokerzwild , gsfanatic , xilliannax , kitty1949 , kizzl , BlooJay , sexxxkitten , thisisadeletedaccount , Billie Bones , Femme Mystique , PoppyTraille , giftdgecko , Lildrummrgurl7 , Clara , nerdygrl , eeep , clockwork451 , SMichelle , pirata , alayamae , butts , CaliGirl , sugar&spikes , Alyxx , Jesyra , Cat E. , Robespierrethecat , XxXxX , Lacey- , lilacviolet , Rraine , amplified to rock , Ice1 , MsDrProfKitty , Gone (LD29) , evie.amor , Eugler , ToyBunny , karenm , novanilla , Bubaloo , Nissa Nissa , bratcat , Martiniman , SecretKinksters , Qozt , chicmichiw , Silverwinds , Bleu , melliegirl , twelve13 , Katie
159
AOutrajus , konicaguy , Inkkythesquid , lainebug
4
Total votes: 589 (435 voters)
Poll is open
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Contributor: Tidwtrguy Tidwtrguy
Do you buy a car without taking it for a test drive?
03/23/2011
Contributor: hornypoet69 hornypoet69
I'm not married, and not sure how I feel about the whole marriage thing in general. But I would be okay with dating a guy who wanted to wait until marriage to have sex. As long as he defined sex as intercourse, and was willing to do other things. I'm not in any huge hurry to have intercourse, so I would actually love to be with a guy who wanted to wait as much as I do. (even if we had different reasons for waiting)
03/23/2011
Contributor: BadassFatass BadassFatass
I couldn't marry someone without knowing if we were compatible in such an important way.
03/23/2011
Contributor: PiratePrincess PiratePrincess
Early in high school I planned to wait, but I'm glad I waited at least until I was 17. I don't think I would have been ready sooner. But currently I've only had sex with the guy that I plan to marry.
03/23/2011
Contributor: toxie m toxie m
As a young teen I decided that virginity was just not for me. It was something to get rid of and get over with, not to hold onto and cherish. So, at 13 I pressured my boyfriend into having sex and that was that. I've always been someone who hates to be a beginner at anything, I always want to have at least some level of skill. That was sort of the way I looked at sex: virginity was just a badge that meant I didn't know what I was doing yet, and clearly that was no good at all, haha
03/23/2011
Contributor: Solar Ray Solar Ray
Sex and marriage? What the hell do they have to do with each other.
03/23/2011
Contributor: TheSinDoll TheSinDoll
No waiting for me. I knew that first time wasn't going to be 'special'.
03/23/2011
Contributor: cectru cectru
I had 10 sexual partners when I met my boyfriend and he had only had one before me. I had never wished I had waited until I was with him. I just felt that I had sex for all the wrong reasons and had to rediscover sex with someone I was truly in love with. But we waited for a year to have sex and it made it more special.
03/23/2011
Contributor: beautiful beautiful
I am not married and I did not wait. I was 12 and I was "talked into" having sex with someone who I thought was going to be my forever boyfriend, he was 16. Of course I was very young, didn't know any better at all. I wish I knew then what I know now. I would have waited a very long time to have sex, because I have had so many problems with sex and men and being confused. I found my knight in shining armor three years ago and I wish that I would have waited to have sex with him. Like cectru said, I was having sex for all the wrong reasons before, and now they are the right reasons, and sex is actually a good feeling now.
03/23/2011
Contributor: tffnyandrs tffnyandrs
I had sex before marraige but to the guy I married (does that make sense? hehe). We were each others first and only and I know I'll get flak for this but we are happy and prefer it this way. Great poll question!
03/24/2011
Contributor: Dusk Dusk
My partner and I were both planning to wait, but we decided not to for a variety of reasons. Firstly we didn't want to rush into marriage just for the sex (especially since I had already been engaged very young with my ex). We also didn't want sex to be held on such a ridiculous pedestal, and we felt that we were right for each other no matter what.
03/24/2011
Contributor: Lithaewyn Lithaewyn
We didn't wait and actually I don't recommend waiting at all. If sex is important to you, don't wait until you're married to find out you may be completely incompatible in the sack. An unhealthy sexual relationship can be just as deadly as poor communication, etc.

Of course in that same vein, I'm not suggesting for very young people to have sex before marriage.
03/24/2011
Contributor: Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
Quote:
Originally posted by BadassFatass
I couldn't marry someone without knowing if we were compatible in such an important way.
That's pretty much how I felt about it too. Luckily, my partner felt the same way!
03/24/2011
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
I say - try before ya buy! I would never marry someone without sleeping with them beforehand.
03/24/2011
Contributor: callsignhusker callsignhusker
Wow i wonderif this correlates sex toy usage better sex life with earlier sexual awakening etc...?
03/24/2011
Contributor: AngelicaU AngelicaU
Quote:
Originally posted by Tidwtrguy
Do you buy a car without taking it for a test drive?
Well said!
03/25/2011
Contributor: AngelicaU AngelicaU
I'm so glad that I got a lot of answers to this and there was quite a variety in the answers too. I totally support people who want to wait and I totally support people who don't because it's your sex life, right? And someone mentioned that they wouldn't mind waiting if sex meant intercourse and they'd like to do other things, if my boyfriend wanted to wait until marriage, I would have felt that way too. I'm not going to do nothing until then. Noo way. I'm a very sexually active person haha. Thankyou for all the answers!
03/25/2011
Contributor: REDRUM REDRUM
I don't believe in waiting.
Sexual compatibility is important.
Plus, I'm just not at all religious.
03/25/2011
Contributor: Leila Eden Leila Eden
I was going to wait until I'm married because I'd heard that it was the right thing to do but then I met my first boyfriend and I realized waiting wasn't the right thing for ME! I stopped waiting and started enjoying myself and my boyfriend and I'm happy with my choice!
03/25/2011
Contributor: CPTInsanity CPTInsanity
I had been having sex for years, but when I met my wife, she made us wait until marriage. That was one of the hardest things that I have ever done. It worked out, but if for some reason we didn't work out and I was going back to dating, I wouldn't do it again. Their was an innocence about it that time. Now it would be just plain stupid. You really want to know if you are sexually compatible or not.
03/25/2011
Contributor: SexyTabby SexyTabby
Hubby is the only person I've ever had sex with but no we didn't wait til we were married to do so. We were engaged for 5 years and we bought a home together before we were married so...yeah the only one who thought I was still a virgin was my mother lol We'll leave her to her delusions
03/27/2011
Contributor: aBeastlyLittleThing aBeastlyLittleThing
Quote:
Originally posted by BadassFatass
I couldn't marry someone without knowing if we were compatible in such an important way.
that's exactly how i feel. i mean, people always say that when you love someone, the sex is good. which, it's relatively good, i guess. but when you're with someone you love AND who has the same needs/wants as you, and who behaves in a manner that you really like, it's sooo much better. i've been with someone who i loved, but we had really no sexual-likeness. the man i'm with now, whom i love more than life itself, likes every single thing i like, in every way. and it's incredible. the difference is unbelievable.
03/29/2011
Contributor: Love&War Love&War
sexuality is a big part of marriage and you need to make sure you're compatible
03/29/2011
Contributor: AngelicaU AngelicaU
I agree with a lot of the things being said. Yes, you can have a good marriage without fabulous sex but why? If you can really be on the same level as someone both mentally and sexually, that's clearly going to be your better choice. Not because of the sex necessarily but because you're more connected with the person in every way.
03/31/2011
Contributor: Fuck it. Fuck it.
I didn't wait. I don't wish that I had. I don't plan on getting married any time soon.

I've got a few friends that plan on waiting and I really hope it ends well for them.
03/31/2011
Contributor: liilii080 liilii080
Quote:
Originally posted by Tidwtrguy
Do you buy a car without taking it for a test drive?
These were my Mom's words to me before she put me on the pill!
03/31/2011
Contributor: NarcissisticLust NarcissisticLust
Young adults need to be educated about sex the feelings which come with sex. I waited until I felt emotionally ready and it was with a person I was completely comfortable with- which was when I was eighteen. Also, in my opinion, if I had waited until marriage there is a chance I would be unfaithful or always wonder what I had missed. Abstinence may be the right choice for some people, but it would not be a good decision for me.
04/08/2011
Contributor: MrRainybowbow MrRainybowbow
Honestly im not religious and i really dont see a point in marriage. It dor=esnt make you love them any more or less and not haveing sex until after would be like a train wreck! To me sex is like that first kiss, you feel how'll strong that connection will be. You dont really know someone till you get them in the sack ;p just saying.
04/10/2011
Contributor: Madeira Madeira
Well I'm gay so waiting until marriage would have meant waiting for America to stop treating LGBTQ people like second class citizens, so um no
04/11/2011
Contributor: Andromeda Andromeda
I planned on waiting for most my teen years, but at 17 I decided waiting may not be for me. I then made the choice not to wait for marriage, but to wait until I was in a steady, loving relationship with a guy I trusted. I did not start dating anyone regularly until I was 19 and did not have penetrative sex until 6 months into the relationship when I felt we had built up a healthy bond and strong level of trust. It was the best decision for me and I'm so glad I didnt have sex before him or close myself off to the idea.
04/11/2011
Contributor: hornypoet69 hornypoet69
Quote:
Originally posted by Madeira
Well I'm gay so waiting until marriage would have meant waiting for America to stop treating LGBTQ people like second class citizens, so um no
Well you could always just get "married" without the legal privilege. I know of a few gay couples who have done this. They just do a ceremony, call it a marriage, and considered themselves married in they eyes of their church, god, their peers, themselves, etc. Or you could move to one of the few states, that it's legal in. But I do agree with you, America needs to get off their ass and let us get married to the people we love.
04/11/2011
Contributor: Curves Curves
i don't think people should get judged for waiting, or for not waiting.
04/16/2011
Contributor: K101 K101
I love what the above comment says from Curves! I totally agree with that.

I actually always planned to wait, unfortunately I did not. My partner and I are marrying after we finish school though so I can't say I regret it.
04/17/2011
Contributor: mrs.mckrakn mrs.mckrakn
I wanted to wait but pretty sure its cuz dad drilled it in my head
04/25/2011
Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Like I have said in many other posts prior to this one, "my father always told me to never buy a car without test driving it. I applied this philosophy to many aspects of my life, this being one of them."

Although, after finding the perfect sexual match for me, I wish I had found him first!
04/26/2011
Contributor: Spilock Spilock
I voted for the waited option, but that's not entirely correct. We wanted to keep it special, and I didn't want to push her, so we decided early on that we wouldn't go there until were at least either 18 or engaged. I proposed about 3 months before she was 18, and we did that very night.

That said, we did everything but that prior to being engaged. For instance, lots and lots of oral.
04/27/2011
Contributor: Kilgorescowboy Kilgorescowboy
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
lost mine at 14 wouldnt have it any other way
04/28/2011
Contributor: HouseWench HouseWench
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I always considered premarital sex as 'tryouts'
04/28/2011
Contributor: cobiffle cobiffle
I wont have sex until i know that person is important to me but dont have to wait til marriage
04/28/2011
Contributor: Howells Howells
I wouldn't do that. If it turns out bad then you are already in a marriage it won't be easy to change.
04/29/2011
Contributor: newfoundlust newfoundlust
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
Not even close. However, I have been married without straying once for 23 years. I know my wife was likewise active before we married, so it was all fine.
04/29/2011
Contributor: ichwillwaffels ichwillwaffels
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I didn't and I got lucky. I'm still with him!
04/29/2011
Contributor: k3 k3
To each their own, in this case. It's whatever is right and feels best for each individual person. :]
04/29/2011
Contributor: neon neon
it should be whenever you're happy and ready.
04/29/2011
Contributor: tickle me pink tickle me pink
Even though we wanted to we didn't make it all the way to the wedding day, but we were already engaged so I'm content with how long we waited.
04/30/2011
Contributor: CheerfulLoner CheerfulLoner
Bugger marriage.
04/30/2011
Contributor: evelyn evelyn
05/01/2011
Contributor: AOutrajus AOutrajus
i tried to wait...but Ive only been with one guy and we're married now so its not that bad.
05/01/2011
Contributor: The Curious Couple The Curious Couple
My fiancee and I were each others first. I wasn't planning on waiting for marriage, but for someone I truly love.
05/05/2011
Contributor: Maeby Maeby
Quote:
Originally posted by tffnyandrs
I had sex before marraige but to the guy I married (does that make sense? hehe). We were each others first and only and I know I'll get flak for this but we are happy and prefer it this way. Great poll question!
I think that's awesome. My husband was my first, and I wouldn't have it any other way
05/09/2011
Contributor: SexyStuff SexyStuff
I get why people don't wait, believe me- it was TOUGH - but I'm glad we waited and I did so for religious reasons.
05/09/2011
Contributor: EvilHomer EvilHomer
When I was younger I found myself blindly following the "party line" of no sex until marriage. That changed when I was actually mature enough to objectively think about it for myself. On the plus side on the equation, it probably saved me getting into a lot of trouble and I got to learn from everyone else's mistakes.

Seems to have worked out about perfectly for me.
05/10/2011
Contributor: Anjulie Anjulie
Where i grew up you are "supposed" to wait, but I always knew that wasnt for me. I say to each his or her own!
05/10/2011
Contributor: GravyCakes GravyCakes
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
i'm actually still waiting. my bf is ok w/ it since i'm still up for a lot of other things. just not actual intercourse. but i don't judge. i have friends who have sex & aren't married & i ask them a lot of questions. it's just a personal choice, i'm afraid of having regrets.
05/18/2011
Contributor: Mommy2 Mommy2
I didnt wait
05/18/2011
Contributor: CAKES CAKES
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I wouldn't want to get married to find out that you and your partner are not sexually compatible.
05/18/2011
Contributor: kinksters kinksters
Quote:
Originally posted by EvilHomer
When I was younger I found myself blindly following the "party line" of no sex until marriage. That changed when I was actually mature enough to objectively think about it for myself. On the plus side on the equation, it probably saved me ... more
very well said
05/19/2011
Contributor: Nando Nando
I can't wait anyway.
05/19/2011
Contributor: RosesThorns RosesThorns
I am not a believer in no sex before marriage. So..yeah I totally didn't wait.
05/28/2011
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by tffnyandrs
I had sex before marraige but to the guy I married (does that make sense? hehe). We were each others first and only and I know I'll get flak for this but we are happy and prefer it this way. Great poll question!
There is nothing wrong with being with only one partner! As long as you are happy, satisfied and fulfilled then more power to you. You shouldn't get any flak here for being happy with your sex life.
05/28/2011
Contributor: Kiwidragon Kiwidragon
I never intended to wait until marriage to have sex, nor did I even intend to wait until I was with someone I thought I was going to marry. Fortunately for me I ended up having sex for the first time with the man I ended up marrying, and I was his first as well. With age and time I've seen that it's very easy to fall into some pretty depressing habits when a person goes about casual sex without...a sense of empowerment or purpose I suppose. I think people who have multiple partners and enjoy things that way are just fine! I have a sibling however though who repeatedly fell into the "friends with benefits" trap and ended up pregnant by a boy (no man acts that way) who wants nothing to do with her and the baby. So, not necessarily a believer in waiting until marriage, but a believer in waiting until you have some direction in life, both in bed and out.
05/30/2011
Contributor: SiNn SiNn
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
its like ive been with my better half my whole life like we were already married so i never waited
06/11/2011
Contributor: Inwitari Inwitari
Didn't wait, wouldn't wait, see no reason to wait. I wouldn't buy a car unless I test drove that sucker.
06/11/2011
Contributor: curmudgeoncat curmudgeoncat
Quote:
Originally posted by REDRUM
I don't believe in waiting.
Sexual compatibility is important.
Plus, I'm just not at all religious.
Agreed!
06/11/2011
Contributor: Miss Anonymous Miss Anonymous
I wanted to wait, I had my heart set on waiting, but life NEVER goes as planned.
06/12/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I was oversexed as a teen, waiting was out of the question.
06/12/2011
Contributor: big b big b
yes
06/13/2011
Contributor: MN58 MN58
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Anonymous
I wanted to wait, I had my heart set on waiting, but life NEVER goes as planned.
So did I especially since I was raised in a christian home.
But I found somebody who I wanted to be with for the rest of my life so we didn't wait to have sex.
06/14/2011
Contributor: Wyo Daisy Wyo Daisy
With my first husband I did not wait and honestly I think taht was part of the reason I married him. I felt that since we had sex that we should get married. I was young and had been raised in a Christian home. We divorced after 2 years of marriage where I was faithful and he not so much. The final straw was when I got off work early and walked in on him.

With my second husband we waited until we were married to be together. I am glad we waited. We have discussed with out oldest child abstinence, but we have also discussed protection as well.

While I feel that waiting was the right choice for me, that does not make it the right choice for everyone.
06/21/2011
Contributor: ss143 ss143
I had intended to but it didn't turn out that way Im happy tho and still with my first and only
06/21/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
i wanted to wait but i lasted till i was... 15 lol. i think it's bs that someone shouldn't have sex till they're married; you miss out on a lot of personal growth
06/22/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
Quote:
Originally posted by Inwitari
Didn't wait, wouldn't wait, see no reason to wait. I wouldn't buy a car unless I test drove that sucker.
yes! this exactly
06/22/2011
Contributor: zeebot zeebot
Quote:
Originally posted by BadassFatass
I couldn't marry someone without knowing if we were compatible in such an important way.
Agreed.
06/22/2011
Contributor: daniel and frances daniel and frances
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
None of these answers really fit me. I intended to wait to have intercourse til I was married. (Did lots of other stuff but no vaginal/anal penetration.) However, when I met my husband (vigin too) we knew we would marry so after 4 months we began having sex. Waiting is the biggest regret of my life. I will not tell my kids to wait, but I will instill the idea that sex shouldn't be done randomly and without love or a longish term commitment.
06/22/2011
Contributor: Vaccinium Vaccinium
My wife wanted to wait until marriage, but I talked her into it.

That said, I wish we would have dated a lot longer than we did (9 months, and we didn't have sex until after we were engaged). Frankly, we are simply not compatible sexually. It would be really, really difficult for me to choose not to marry her again if given the second chance, but I do wish we'd have been sexually active before I asked her to marry me. I'd have at least known what I was getting myself into.

Because of this, I will be recommending (against my wife's wishes, no doubt) to each of my kids that they be sexually active with anyone they are considering marrying well before the marriage proposal comes. Sexual compatibility is as important as compatibility in any other aspect of the relationship.
06/26/2011
Contributor: Acorn Acorn
I don't think it's necessary to wait until marriage to have sex. I think sex is an important part of a relationship and you don't want to wait until you are married to find out that you aren't compatible sex partners.
06/28/2011
Contributor: MJ1337 MJ1337
Sex compatibility is rather important in a marriage (sad to say, it's true). Also I think people should get an idea of whats out there (YES, in bed) before they settle down with the "one" for the rest of their life.
06/28/2011
Contributor: js250 js250
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I did not wait, but was in a seriously committed relationship.
07/04/2011
Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
There should be a "I regret having sex before marriage" option.
07/26/2011
Contributor: Lady Nina Lady Nina
I did not wait till marriage
07/27/2011
Contributor: beachluv51800 beachluv51800
had intended to wait, but didn't quite work out that way. Life did not go as planned, so it happened.
08/08/2011
Contributor: daveysgirl daveysgirl
no way!
08/09/2011
Contributor: emiliaa emiliaa
Quote:
Originally posted by Tidwtrguy
Do you buy a car without taking it for a test drive?
Fantastic post here. XD

But really. There's no way I could do that! I think it's an odd religious thing of sorts but I was not raised that way.
08/09/2011
Contributor: thebest thebest
before n after
08/10/2011
Contributor: ToyGurl ToyGurl
I wanted to wait. It's literally bred into my family to wait until marriage. It is one of our values, and something we all believe in. My first time was basically something I forced myself to do to feel important to a guy. He had always told me he was a virgin, and when I found out he had done just about everything but sex, I knew I had to blow his mind in order to be ahead of the other girls. Biggest mistake I ever made.
08/10/2011
Contributor: Booktease Booktease
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
Well, as someone who got married to a woman, I didn't wait until we were married. :-P But I never thought I would in any case (man or woman). I'm not really religious, so I didn't see why I should wait.
08/12/2011
Contributor: Kkay Kkay
Didn't wait, wouldn't wait. I'd rather not make the decision to get married out of sexual frustration.
08/12/2011
Contributor: Ava5 Ava5
Quote:
Originally posted by MJ1337
Sex compatibility is rather important in a marriage (sad to say, it's true). Also I think people should get an idea of whats out there (YES, in bed) before they settle down with the "one" for the rest of their life.
I agree. It's not emphasized enough in our society in my opinion. I hope I can teach my kids how important sexual compatibility is in a life long relationship. Trust me, it really sucks to find out after you are already committed to each other, (like because of a pregnancy) that you are not compatible. It can work but it's really hard.
08/21/2011
Contributor: Beck Beck
Sex to me is one of the most important things in a relationship. I wanted to know how he was before marring him. Being compatible is important, you surely do not want to add sexual frustration to the list of things to fight about. If one only wants to do it once in awhile and the other is a horn ball that is only going to add fuel to the fire. Plus not everyones shapes and angles match up. I had one boyfriend, we tried for 6 months to have sex. Never worked, we just were not right fit. Happens, I would not want to wait till the honeymoon to find that out.
08/25/2011
Contributor: InNeedOfABuzzzz InNeedOfABuzzzz
It may sound totally horrible but I believe in "test driving" especially when it's someone you are going to spend your entire adult life with! You can have all the good lovey dovey wonder and joy but if your sex life sucks it will eventually catch up to you. I couldn't imagine marrying someone who was bad in bed....I mean how do you deal with that?

I do believe in the whole sanctity of the theory....but I couldn't do it. No freaking way.
08/25/2011
Contributor: Lucky21 Lucky21
I have zero regrets on not waiting.
09/01/2011
Contributor: IslandGoddess IslandGoddess
This doesnt make sense to me...Why wait? I kno they say good things come to those who wait... BUT what if you wait and after you get married he she turns out to be THE MOST HORRIBLE SEX PARTNER EVER?????????!!!!!!!!. ..haha Sucks for you...You married him cause you love him for everythingggggggggg else but he has a little dick and he sucks in bed!
09/09/2011
Contributor: cocomo cocomo
if i was with the right person first i woould have waited
09/16/2011
Contributor: cocomo cocomo
Quote:
Originally posted by IslandGoddess
This doesnt make sense to me...Why wait? I kno they say good things come to those who wait... BUT what if you wait and after you get married he she turns out to be THE MOST HORRIBLE SEX PARTNER EVER?????????!!!!!!!!. ..haha Sucks for you...You ... more
hopefully theres a lot of everything else to love. you are too funny!! i posted if i was with the right person first i would have waited, but, then again, i am writting this after knowing he is good in bed
09/16/2011
Contributor: hyacinthgirl hyacinthgirl
I waited until I was engaged. But even if I had waited for marriage, it wouldn't have changed anything, since it was a short, bad marriage that poisoned far more than it helped.

I planned on waiting again for a real commitment (hopefully with a man who could actually make and keep a commitment), but my sub has made me reconsider that.
09/30/2011
Contributor: mistressg mistressg
Didn't wait, didn't plan to.
09/30/2011
Contributor: Love Perpetua Love Perpetua
I waited until I was in a committed relationship, but that's about it.
10/02/2011
Contributor: unfulfilled unfulfilled
I didn't wait, I was 16 and thought I was in love "what a joke!" I was committed, but he wasn't he ended up cheating several times before I found out about it and we broke up. Then it was my husband and we waited!
10/03/2011
Contributor: WhoopieDoo WhoopieDoo
I waited....but not for moral or religious reasons. I was afraid, and "saving myself" was a convenient way to put it off.
10/03/2011
Contributor: ScotchIrish ScotchIrish
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I enjoyed an affair at 15 with a woman at lasted two years while she and her husband were divorcing. I did not have intercourse till I married at 27. I wanted to. But, I was always the like you as a friend to the ones I wanted to have sex with. And, did not take advantage of others that would have; just to have sex. If I don't desire her, I would never use or take the opportunity just for the sake of having sex. That being said. After a negative experience sexually in marriage. I am more flexible with my considerations; but, I don't attract the women. A stud left in the lumber yard; never gets nailed. lol. My joke, I wrote it and I am a comedic writer. 5/1/10
10/03/2011
Contributor: ScotchIrish ScotchIrish
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
And, another thing. I was raised a Catholic. I am no longer a Catholic. I was never confirmed but did marry and live a Catholic life for my 21 year marriage. I am a Christian now. Have all the sex you want. But, have ethics, morals and respect for your partners. Do not cheat. 21yrs I never cheated. If you cannot keep your word. What value as a person do you have. If there is a problem; address it and find a common ground that works for you. I do not cast stones. There are a myriad of stories and lifestyles out there. Just be safe and don't let any entity tell you what is right or wrong as long as you are adults and respect your responsibilities.
10/03/2011
Contributor: Diabolical Kitty Diabolical Kitty
I grew up baptist and thought I was going to wait until I started to question religion. So I ended up not waiting.
10/10/2011
Contributor: SaMiKaY SaMiKaY
I have grown up studying sex and it's effects on relationships. After almost 10 years of researching (believe it or not, but I started around 8 years old), I determined sex is one of those keys to a happy relationship. Therefore, I came up with this rule when dating (please don't judge me. It sound slutty, but it makes sense):

If I am not sexually attracted to you after our first date, there is no future. I am not going to waste months-years with someone only to find out that I am indeed not sexually compatible with you.


The man I am with now, whom is the love of my life, I had sex with on the first date because I was SO attracted to him. We are now living together and raising a family! =) It worked for me!
10/13/2011
Contributor: eroticmutt eroticmutt
I did not wait and I am GLAD I didn't. When I was younger, I ended up engaged and in a long term relationship lasting a long time, but I wasn't ready for it. Not only was I still immature, I also felt there were very very many things left to experience and that I would have missed out on them. Even though I'd had sex before that. Now imagine if that had been my one and only partner. The idea of it may be romantic and appealing to some, and initially it was to me also, but I feel that variety and adventure are very exciting to me, and also helped me to grow as a person.

If someone else wants to wait then that is fine, but it is not for everyone. Just like there is no one single partner that is right for everyone- sex is a very individual and personal matter.
11/03/2011
Contributor: GonetoLovehoney GonetoLovehoney
I did not wait, and I would never have waited anyway. I don't want to get married, it seems like a stupid construct to me with the only benefit being financial. I need to test and make sure a guy is compatible with me before continuing or confirming a long-term relationship.
11/20/2011
Contributor: geliebt geliebt
Nope! I want to know everything about someone before I commit the rest of my life to them, and sex is part of that!
11/29/2011
Contributor: tlaskowski tlaskowski
well i do have two kids and the wedding date isnt til 2013! so yeah!
12/03/2011
Contributor: (k)InkyIvy (k)InkyIvy
I can understand that some people feel the need or desire to wait until after marriage before having sex with their partner... My view? You should find out BEFORE committing to someone through marriage whether you're sexually compatible. What if you love anal/bdsm/whatever and your partner can't stand it? What if your bodies just don't work together, don't fit? How horrible would it be to marry someone, only to find out that your sex life is doomed?
12/04/2011
Contributor: aimtoplease aimtoplease
Quote:
Originally posted by Tidwtrguy
Do you buy a car without taking it for a test drive?
This, lol
12/04/2011
Contributor: jedent jedent
test drive for sure.
12/04/2011
Contributor: Hallmar82 Hallmar82
Although we didn't wait (technically), I will strongly encourage anyone else to wait...it is worth it. When you combine the emotional with the physical, then it can become spiritual. If you hate all things spiritual, then I'm sorry you'll never experience that, but I wish you all the best.
12/08/2011
Contributor: Sinfully Sinfully
No, I didn't wait.
12/08/2011
Contributor: llellsee llellsee
Neither my partner or I are virgins but we are getting married in a few weeks time and have so far never had sex with each other,it works well within our dynamic,I'm domme and more into women and sex toys,he's submissive and into chastity,teasing and denial
12/08/2011
Contributor: interestingstuff interestingstuff
Is anyone familiar with Martin Lawrence's Run Tell Dat? In it he mentions premarital sex and I agree with him. I'm want to know what I'm going to be getting my self into, or rather, what going to be getting inside of me.
12/09/2011
Contributor: duff duff
I wanted to wait...
12/09/2011
Contributor: DiscretionAdvised DiscretionAdvised
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I masturbated by myself throughout my teens, but I always wanted to wait until marriage to do anything sexual with another person.

My senior year of high school, I started dating my first girlfriend. She had some early sexual experiences (she got fingered at 13), but she had since regretted it and wanted to wait for marriage to do anything else. For the 5 years we dated, we had kisses that never involved tongue, back massages, extended hugs, etc. We were physical, sure, but not sexual.

3 months after I left for college my senior year, she gave a guy a blowjob. We broke up. She proceeded to have multiple sexual partners over the next year.

2 years after this all happened, I met a girl. The only sexual knowledge she had is what she had picked up from biology classes. Her desire to wait until marriage, combined with her freakish determination, had kept her away from nearly anything relating to sex. Same as before: kisses never involving tongue, back massages, extended hugs, etc. We were physical, but not sexual.

After 2 1/2 years (would have been shorter if it wasn't for finances), we got married. It was wonderful, awkward, and beautiful.

I feel like most who hear our story assume that we look down on those who didn't wait, but that's not true. But I can tell you with absolute certainty that I'll never regret that we waited, and she'll tell you the same.
12/09/2011
Contributor: Envy Envy
Nope, didn't wait. Why would I? If I was to get married (I'm not big on marriage and it's not for me, really) I would want to know everything about the guy I'm with rather than be stuck with someone that I might find out, say, is selfish in bed and only thinks about his satisfaction. I'd rather find out before than after.
12/09/2011
Contributor: Zombirella Zombirella
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I did not wait. And I don't believe there is anything wrong with that. I'd hate to get stuck with someone who isn't a good lover because I waited until marriage to find out.
01/04/2012
Contributor: Aberrant Aberrant
I didn't wait until marriage, but I did wait until I was with a great guy who I loved and had already experimented sexually with (so the experience was fun, not awkward!) I am really glad that I do not regret my first time, as so many of my friends do
I don't think there is anything wrong with waiting until you're married, but I didn't see the point.
01/06/2012
Contributor: Undead Undead
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I think it's better to know what you're 'getting into' before making that big of a commitment.
01/06/2012
Contributor: Claire de Cerises Claire de Cerises
When I was younger, I knew that I wanted to wait and see how things panned out before deciding whether or not to have sex before marriage. After my first relationship, I decided to wait to have sex until I felt like I was with the right person, with someone I truly loved. A few years later, I ended up losing my virginity to my current boyfriend. No regrets!
01/07/2012
Contributor: Collogue Collogue
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
OTHER!: Unmarried and planning to wait. As a student who is incredibly busy and also as someone with minor anxiety (undiagnosed), planning sex was causing me too much stress/inner dissonance so I decided to continue waiting, which my partner is okay with.
01/08/2012
Contributor: Daemonin Daemonin
I thought I was going to wait, then I realized that it didn't make any sense to wait (in my mind). I was 14, though, and thought I knew everything. I'm glad I did, though, because I think it made my lifetime partner selection easier without having to worry about virginity and pressure and waiting and all that. If I didn't like how things went in bed, how could I live with him? That would suck.
01/18/2012
Contributor: MeliPixie MeliPixie
When I was younger, I always said I would wait, but I decided not to. I'm glad I didn't, because who knows? Sex is an integral part of any healthy relationship, why get married if there's the chanced you're not sexually compatible?
01/18/2012
Contributor: chantalgiardina chantalgiardina
didnt wait
01/19/2012
Contributor: Missmarc Missmarc
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I cannot imagine marrying someone without knowing if the person is compatible sexually.
02/01/2012
Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
I used to believe in waiting but I also never wanted to get married. Now that I'm older and wiser, I know that it's important that you're sexually-compatible with your significant other. Waiting could be the death of your marriage if you and your SO just do NOT click.
02/23/2012
Contributor: AJvil AJvil
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
No waiting for me
02/28/2012
Contributor: MissCandyland MissCandyland
No waiting for me.
02/28/2012
Contributor: samanthalynn samanthalynn
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
No, I did not wait till marriage
02/28/2012
Contributor: Lizzy Lizzy
Not married. I definitely wouldn't wait.
02/28/2012
Contributor: hippie hippie
I am not married, but I clearly did not wait. for me sex is a big part of our connection, not the only or the main thing, but it undoubtedly is an aspect that brought us a lot closer together. It is not only the act, but also our conversations right after sex have always been a lot more intimate than the conversations we had just snuggling before we were sexually active with one another. Sex added a dimension to our relationship, and I don't think it would have been helpful to wait until marriage for that. I want to make sure we are compatible on all aspects of life, including sex.
02/29/2012
Contributor: Badass Badass
when i was young i wanted to wait, but that didnt happen.. lol
03/01/2012
Contributor: asoutherngirl asoutherngirl
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I believe that everyone should decide for themselves if they want sex or not and no one should shame them for it (not saying anyone here has, just in general). As long as everyone involved is overage, consenting, and being safe I see no problem.
03/01/2012
Contributor: fredacarl fredacarl
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
No, I did not wait till marriage
03/01/2012
Contributor: purple579 purple579
I wanted to wait till marriage when I was little but after I had a boyfriend that I loved and was very attracted to I said screw that.
03/12/2012
Contributor: Brenard Brenard
Not at all. Thought I might, but met that person I felt I would be with so went with it.
03/17/2012
Contributor: plaidvulva plaidvulva
Didn't wait, never planned to wait, glad I didn't wait. Honestly, I lost my virginity before I ever even had anyone preaching to keep it until marriage.
03/17/2012
Contributor: Do emu Do emu
I think it's a romantic idea but my desire is stronger than my will to wait.
03/18/2012
Contributor: robertk2380 robertk2380
We were both inexperienced when we met, but it made it so special to learn together. By the time we got married, we had a good sense of what the other liked, but have continued to learn and grow through the years. It's great. Glad we didn't wait until marriage.
03/18/2012
Contributor: jokerzwild jokerzwild
Never been married but there is no chance I would wait, sexual chemistry is far too important to just role a dice.
03/24/2012
Contributor: Lilith Bealove Lilith Bealove
I really wish I would have waited, or at least waited for my husband. He is the ONLY guy (out of 7) that I have been with that focused on me some too.
03/26/2012
Contributor: lisasharrer lisasharrer
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
i went for it because it was not that good
03/26/2012
Contributor: nanamondoute nanamondoute
I never thought it was necessary to wait.
05/06/2012
Contributor: SouthernBelle SouthernBelle
I was planning to wait... and I did until I was 19. By that time though, I no longer had the same belief system that had supported my waiting.
05/06/2012
Contributor: gsfanatic gsfanatic
Didn't see the point, try before you buy, since it'll be probably for life.
05/06/2012
Contributor: Falsepast Falsepast
Haven't done it, but i think i won't wait.
05/07/2012
Contributor: woodsdragon woodsdragon
My fiance and I both came into our relationship having already had sexual experiences with others. We were both very open about it and we have had sex before marriage. I think it is important to make sure that you are able to connect sexually before getting married. Marriage is a big commitment and sex can play a big role in that relationship.
07/09/2012
Contributor: Crimson Vixen Crimson Vixen
I was raised Catholic, and for the longest time I felt shameful about my body and masturbating. Coming out of my shell has taken a few years.

I am no longer Catholic, and now my path leads me to strongly believe that if you are in love with someone sex is something wonderful to be shared. It forms trust and is very intimate. I love making love to my fiancee and the closeness it brings.
07/09/2012
Contributor: xilliannax xilliannax
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
Why buy the pig if its not going to give you decent sausage?
07/10/2012
Contributor: epiphanyjayne epiphanyjayne
I waited 2 months while we dated then when we felt a mutual respect and feeling of closeness that we finally had sex. we both wanted to but we got to know each and had fun and hung out (became each others best friends) and even had phone sex but we waited and that worked to solidify our relationship. I think it's possible to have sex on a first date and find love but it's less likely. Waiting a good amount of time while getting to know the person make sure you feel comfortable with the person, you feel respected, safe and cared for. It also gives you time to see if this is a person you want to be with, because after some time of hanging out you'll find out things that might be deal breakers. If you don't make good friends how could you make good lovers?

This to me is a lessen well learned, personally.
07/11/2012
Contributor: booboo111926 booboo111926
my plan was to wait but i didnt
07/11/2012
Contributor: CadmiumKitty CadmiumKitty
sex before after and always
07/13/2012
Contributor: kitty1949 kitty1949
I didn't wait and never intended to.
07/13/2012
Contributor: kizzl kizzl
I lost my virginity at 15, which compared to most these days is on the old side. By the time I met my current beau, I'd been with 16 people in the five years I'd be sexually active. I felt as though I needed to be compatible in every way to make a relationship work, especially since I have a high sex drive.
I did have a long relationship with a guy whom didn't enjoy sex, wasn't very good at it, and had no intention on changing that. I loved him, but masturbation only gets you so far. Not to mention I didn't have any toys at that point.
07/20/2012
Contributor: sexxxkitten sexxxkitten
Quote:
Originally posted by xilliannax
Why buy the pig if its not going to give you decent sausage?
Lol!
07/20/2012
Contributor: thisisadeletedaccount thisisadeletedaccount
I don't think I ever planned on waiting until marriage to have sex. I'm also not even sure if I plan on ever getting married.
07/22/2012
Contributor: Scrawberry78 Scrawberry78
You need to test the goods. It could be terrible.
07/23/2012
Contributor: giftdgecko giftdgecko
Sex doesn't determine the relationship ending because it is something that can be learned. But waiting is outdated and unnecessary nowadays
07/31/2012
Contributor: xcapricax xcapricax
Waiting is the worst idea ever.
07/31/2012
Contributor: xcapricax xcapricax
Waiting is the worst idea ever.
07/31/2012
Contributor: clockwork451 clockwork451
I don't plan on getting married, so HELL NO. Waiting is not an option.
08/03/2012
Contributor: Deeder Deeder
I would have preferred to wait, but if I had we probably wouldn't be married as it is. Thankfully I can say that my hubby is the only person that I've been with.
08/03/2012
Contributor: PassionCpl PassionCpl
No, neither of us waited
08/11/2012
Contributor: pirata pirata
i only waited until i was completely comfortable with him. we intend to get married and i've never understood waiting until then anyway
08/11/2012
Contributor: Rory Rory
I wasn't going out to find sex but we ended up having sex. As fate would have it I've been with that same man for forty years.
08/18/2012
Contributor: alayamae alayamae
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I don't believe in that.
08/23/2012
Contributor: jr2012 jr2012
I don't really believe in marriage for myself...so it was either that or join the nunnery!
10/23/2012
Contributor: butts butts
I don't believe in marriage personally, for other people it's great but we just don't see the point in signing papers and having a ceremony just to say that we're committed and love each other. No way would either of us wait for marriage, even my parents (whom I usually disagree with) said don't wait because if you're not sexually compatible, it can really hurt a relationship, don't wait until marriage to find out.

Personally I think waiting is often wrong, it encourages people to get married for the wrong reasons. There should be no shame in sex, it's healthy and natural, if you like someone, or love them, you should be free to have sex if you want to.
10/23/2012
Contributor: smlove smlove
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I waited til I was 18, which I think most people should do. Sex just complicates life to the max, and dealing with puberty and emotions as a teenager is more than overwhelming without the added complications of sex.
However, waiting until marriage, I certainly didn't. But if that's your MO, you do what you feel is best for you.
10/24/2012
Contributor: smlove smlove
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I waited til I was 18, which I think most people should do. Sex just complicates life to the max, and dealing with puberty and emotions as a teenager is more than overwhelming without the added complications of sex.
However, waiting until marriage, I certainly didn't. But if that's your MO, you do what you feel is best for you.
10/24/2012
Contributor: CaliGirl CaliGirl
Quote:
Originally posted by Tidwtrguy
Do you buy a car without taking it for a test drive?
This is hilarious!
10/24/2012
Contributor: Harpina is gone Harpina is gone
I'm not married and I've had sex plenty of times.
10/24/2012
Contributor: Alyxx Alyxx
I didn't wait and really didn't intend to. I think I planned on waiting until marriage for a grand total of two or three months back in jr high, then decided it was a silly idea. And I'm glad I didn't wait. For one thing, I have come to the decision that marriage isn't something I want for myself. I feel no need for a piece of paper and a legal status to prove my commitment to someone. I'd rather a nice non-legal hand fasting. For another, I think it can be a big mistake to marry someone before you know if you are sexually compatible. I also think the idea of waiting until marriage can make some people get married to the wrong person long before they are ready to get married, just because they want to have sex.
10/24/2012
Contributor: tortilla tortilla
no way was I waiting
10/24/2012
Contributor: Noelle Noelle
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
We had sex once, but we knew almost as soon as we met that we were going to get married. We waited 14 LONG months until we got married to have sex again. DAMN that was a L-O-N-G 14 months!!! (WE didn't live together until we were married, so it was easier to wait).
10/24/2012
Contributor: Robespierrethecat Robespierrethecat
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I just went for it. I'm a very sexually curious and positive person and I'm not particularly religious. Furthermore, my family doesn't have very strong religious values either.
11/01/2012
Contributor: hanjonatan hanjonatan
hah, i didn't even wait until my first relationship.
11/03/2012
Contributor: RonLee RonLee
Quote:
Originally posted by xcapricax
Waiting is the worst idea ever.
Exactly!
11/03/2012
Contributor: RememberMe RememberMe
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
I didn't wait but maybe I should have.
11/06/2012
Contributor: Rraine Rraine
I didn't wait; but I wish I had.
12/04/2012
Contributor: ginnyluvspotter ginnyluvspotter
Quote:
Originally posted by Tidwtrguy
Do you buy a car without taking it for a test drive?
agreed!
12/04/2012
Contributor: MsDrProfKitty MsDrProfKitty
I had no desire to wait! I firmly believe that to find someone you're truly happy with you should be truly happy with yourself (this includes knowing your intimate side). And I also believe that a partner should know the "whole" you before you tie the knot! So, that includes you in the sack! I am supportive of those who believe otherwise but this is my opinion.
I gave up my v-card to the wrong guy, admittedly, but I have no regrets. I have learned a lot about myself since then and I feel that my current guy (of 2 years!) and I have a stronger connection for not holding back anything.
12/05/2012
Contributor: Kitten has left the site Kitten has left the site
I was going to wait because of past relationships, plus I was waiting for a STD/AIDS test to come back so that I would know if I was alright (I was and am), and he was respecting that, but sadly my mother actually broke me down and made me feel guilty by telling me I wasn't being a good girlfriend if I couldn't provide a man who I was living with, sleeping in the same bed with, taking a shower with pleasure. We found out last year it was because she wanted me unhappy in my relationship so that he would break up with me and she thought if I constantly bothered him for sex (Like she said to) he would break up with me.
Sure enough we had sex a few times and when he asked me why I was so upset one night about it I told him.
He went after her the next day. She's never forced us to do anything ever since. He didnt' hurt her, but he did give her one good yelling at.
But after that sex was very fun
01/15/2013
Contributor: Septimus Septimus
Hell no I'm not waiting! I've been with him for 5 years, do you think we're not having sex?
01/15/2013
Contributor: Hummingbird Hummingbird
No and I'm glad I didn't though I wish the first time I wish it would have been with someone special.
01/16/2013
Contributor: Eugler Eugler
I wasn't raised that religious and started questioning religion very early.

Always sympathizing with feminist movement I considered marriage as... not that important.

And it's not common to wait until marriage in Europe.
01/16/2013
Contributor: Flower1 Flower1
i didnt wait
01/16/2013
Contributor: falalena falalena
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
i had been told growing up to always wait until marriage, but i didnt care much either way and did not wait.
01/22/2013
Contributor: novanilla novanilla
I was told to wait by parents who didn't wait, and I didn't care. I always felt like I'd rather find out if they were horrible in bed first, because then I'd be up and out of there. I also don't date people just to find out if I'm going to marry them. Marriage is not a big deal to me. If I don't get married, I don't care.
02/05/2013
Contributor: Munko Munko
I'd never marry without sex first. Sexual compatibility often mirrors compatibility in general. I can say for certain that any issues SO and I have in the bedroom (which aren't many, but at times have been significant) are close to issues we also have outside of the bedroom. It's often, in the beginning stages of a relationship, easy to miss those little discrepancies because of lust, or the other person trying to impress, etc. But its often hard to hide it if you don't match up in the bedroom.

Also, it wasn't until I met my fiance that I ever intended to get married, I didn't believe in it or think it was anything special. And I had no intentions on staying a virgin forever!
02/05/2013
Contributor: inkky inkky
i didn't wait
02/05/2013
Contributor: souviet souviet
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelicaU
Did you wait, or did you just go for it..
since my marrying was illegal up until this past election, I ignored it.
02/06/2013
Contributor: LoooveMonkey LoooveMonkey
I was going to wait, and for a few years, we never had a sexual aspect to our relationship, but then we started talking about it and about getting married, and since we weren't getting married for probably another 5 years, it just didn't seem practical, so we started with talking about dirty things we'd like to do, things that we would and would not be into, and things that turned us on, which went to webcam sex, and then when we did finally get to see each other in person after dating for several years online, we had sex our very first day together and it was PERFECT. I know people say your first time is awkward, but mine was really not. It was amazing. I guess after years of talking and looking without being able to touch, it should have been, right? XD
02/06/2013
Contributor: Bubaloo Bubaloo
I didn't wait and I wasn't going to wait.
02/06/2013
Contributor: Nissa Nissa Nissa Nissa
How about lots of sex before and no sex after? Just kidding. Gotta make sure you're compatible so.. before and after
02/06/2013
Contributor: Martiniman Martiniman
Siting to have sex until I was married never crossed my mind.
02/06/2013
Contributor: Qozt Qozt
I'm not married, but I'd never get married to someone without having sex with them first.
02/28/2013
Contributor: hillys hillys
I'm not married and I've had sex. I think you should do whatever you want to do. If you wanna wait, do that. If you don't, don't. Some people are married younger, some older. My grandpa is a paster and actually now thinks living together before becoming married is good because you'll learn if your suited to each other or not. So even if your going to skip the sex before marriage I would highly recommend the living together part.
02/28/2013
Contributor: chicmichiw chicmichiw
Sex is really important to a relationship. You have to know before you commit.
02/28/2013
Contributor: Bleu Bleu
Sex is too important to me for connecting and bonding for me to wait...so I didn't wait.
03/03/2013
Contributor: melliegirl melliegirl
my mom told me not to wait until marriage bc you could get stuck with someone who is sexual uncompatable with you like a friend of hers did
03/06/2013
Contributor: twelve13 twelve13
I probably wouldn't marry someone without sleeping with them first.
03/07/2013