Lets say I'm looking to date a girl, and she invites me to her place for a party only for me to find that she lives with two guys.
Thoughts about a person of interest (male or female) living with a roommate of the opposite sex.
06/23/2011
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I might be a little weirded out and uneasy, but those feelings would disappear soon.
06/23/2011
It would depend on how close she was to them if I would be weird or not
06/23/2011
i would probably be weirded out but would talk with the person and go from there.
06/23/2011
You would sense whether something is going on with the roommates. My son has shared apartments with female roommates and nothing sexual or romantic happened.
I would just trust your instincts about whether you need to be concerned.
I would just trust your instincts about whether you need to be concerned.
06/23/2011
This would be make uneasy, but it wouldn't be too hard to get over once I got to know the roommate/s.
06/23/2011
Honestly I don't think it'd make me uneasy at all. I was screwing around with a guy who lived with only one girl, and it didn't even matter to me...then again that was totally casual. Still, I don't think I see gender the same way as most people, and it might be a good thing to look into. :3
06/24/2011
I think I'd feel a little uncomfortable, but I'd just assess the situation when there and see how they all interact with each other.
06/24/2011
Being pansexual, gender doesnt really bother me at all.
06/24/2011
dont think it would weird me out
06/24/2011
I've a situation when the guy I liked lived with two roommates, one of whom was a straight female. I felt uncomfortable at first, but then he told me he does not care for her, so I calmed down. Which was surprising, because I'm a very suspicious person.
06/25/2011
Looking to date? Or dating? Is she interested in dating you?
I would say that until you're in a relationship you can't really even broach the subject. Acting jealous before you even start dating may turn her off. It would me.
If you are dating, then ask her if there's ever been anything between them or if there still is? If she is an honest person she'll be transparent about her history. Even if they have a history doesn't mean that there's anything between them. How many times have you kissed someone you thought you liked only to find out that there was no chemistry? And just because there was chemistry before, doesn't mean there's chemistry now.
Whatever she tells you, just take it at her word, and find a way to move past it. Unless it's serious, asking/wanting her to change her living situation is asking a lot from her.
Men and women can coexist without it being sexual or romantic, regardless of sexual orientation. Roommates don't always spend time together either, it's sometimes a situation of convenience.
I would say that until you're in a relationship you can't really even broach the subject. Acting jealous before you even start dating may turn her off. It would me.
If you are dating, then ask her if there's ever been anything between them or if there still is? If she is an honest person she'll be transparent about her history. Even if they have a history doesn't mean that there's anything between them. How many times have you kissed someone you thought you liked only to find out that there was no chemistry? And just because there was chemistry before, doesn't mean there's chemistry now.
Whatever she tells you, just take it at her word, and find a way to move past it. Unless it's serious, asking/wanting her to change her living situation is asking a lot from her.
Men and women can coexist without it being sexual or romantic, regardless of sexual orientation. Roommates don't always spend time together either, it's sometimes a situation of convenience.
06/25/2011
So I probably didn't word it well. We are at a point where we can make the relationship official, but the roommate situation makes me uneasy going into it.
Thanks for the replies.
Thanks for the replies.
06/25/2011
Quote:
I still say that if she isn't intimate with them, it shouldn't matter. If you can't trust her, then you probably shouldn't make the relationship official.
Originally posted by
Humor4Fun
So I probably didn't word it well. We are at a point where we can make the relationship official, but the roommate situation makes me uneasy going into it.
Thanks for the replies.
Thanks for the replies.
06/25/2011
Umm no i will not be with them for long
06/25/2011
Living with guys doesn't mean she's having relationships with them. Most of my best friends are guys, less drama and gossip to deal with than females! Excuse me ladies!
06/26/2011
Its fine with opposites living together so long as boundaries are made and are respected (particularly if there's any sexual tension between parties).
07/05/2011
Quote:
Heard.
Originally posted by
Rossie
Living with guys doesn't mean she's having relationships with them. Most of my best friends are guys, less drama and gossip to deal with than females! Excuse me ladies!
07/05/2011
it's whatever. if they slept with them, more power to them. i find that lots of men don't sleep with their co ed roommates though; it usually leads to some nasty drama and they're not living with them because they want to sleep with them anyway
07/08/2011
Normally I wouldn't care (most of my boyfriends had a lot of girl friends), but if it becomes clear that they had something "going on", even in the past, I might be a bit creeped out.
07/08/2011
I have a male roommate. We tell everyone we're related, because we might as well be. Complete lack of sexual tension/interest, ever, at any point since we met each other.
09/06/2011
It would really make me uneasy, personally
09/06/2011
what's to be uneasy about?
so she's cool enough for males to hang out with on platonic terms. she's probably pretty cool.
if she's a swinger and that's why she's living with two guys (rare rare rare but *could be the case... just ask her dude) then of course decide if you're into that or not.
obviously it is making you uneasy so just talk to her about it. use your best judgment and your instinct to see if there seems to be some sexual tension between them. you'll know a situation when you see one.
so she's cool enough for males to hang out with on platonic terms. she's probably pretty cool.
if she's a swinger and that's why she's living with two guys (rare rare rare but *could be the case... just ask her dude) then of course decide if you're into that or not.
obviously it is making you uneasy so just talk to her about it. use your best judgment and your instinct to see if there seems to be some sexual tension between them. you'll know a situation when you see one.
09/06/2011
Quote:
One of my exes lived with a girl and she was basically trying to climb into his lap every time i was over at his apartment. I kind of have a bad feeling about the idea but then again I had a bad experience too.
Originally posted by
Humor4Fun
Lets say I'm looking to date a girl, and she invites me to her place for a party only for me to find that she lives with two guys.
09/07/2011
It does sound like a recipe for disaster.
12/11/2011
Just commenting here because I have an opposite-sex roommate. We might as well be siblings, since we're just good friends with zero sexual interest on either side. Other situations may be different, but anyone who came over and met my roommate should be able to tell there's not a chance of anything going on. Then again, I also wouldn't want to date a guy who was suspicious of my having male friends, since lots of my friends are guys.
12/11/2011
I never had that experience, but it's something I think would be fun if you could somehow work out some no-strings-attached sex.
12/11/2011
Quote:
Pretty much exactly what I was going to say but from the male perspective lol.
Originally posted by
MissMori
Just commenting here because I have an opposite-sex roommate. We might as well be siblings, since we're just good friends with zero sexual interest on either side. Other situations may be different, but anyone who came over and met my roommate
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Just commenting here because I have an opposite-sex roommate. We might as well be siblings, since we're just good friends with zero sexual interest on either side. Other situations may be different, but anyone who came over and met my roommate should be able to tell there's not a chance of anything going on. Then again, I also wouldn't want to date a guy who was suspicious of my having male friends, since lots of my friends are guys.
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12/11/2011
I wouldn't mind generally speaking, but it depends on the individuals, of course. I've had friends who've had opposite-sex roommates and did have a fling together at one point, and I've had friends who were strictly platonic in that situation. I'd want to meet the roommates and get to know everyone to figure out the dynamic, but the idea in general doesn't stir up any issues for me right off the bat.
12/11/2011
Doesn't mean anything necessarily. I'd use my instincts and try not to make assumptions.
12/11/2011
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Unique posters: 51
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