Would you date someone that has a child/children from a previous relationship?

Contributor: Kimbertrees Kimbertrees
Would you date someone that has a child/children from a previous relationship?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
No
90  (33%)
Yes
181  (66%)
Yes, but only if they were married to the person they had children with.
2  (1%)
Yes, but only if they were not married before the person had children.
1  (0%)
Total votes: 274
Poll is closed
11/11/2010
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Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
At THIS point in my life no. BUT, later on if I'm not married or divorced or whatever I might consider it but hopefully that never happens! We plan to be married soon and have kids of our own.
11/11/2010
Contributor: darthkitt3n darthkitt3n
I would not be interested in someone who already has kids. I just think it would be a little weird to have to discipline them or something.
11/11/2010
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
When I was with Mulder, I insisted that his children NOT know of me. He was puzzled by this as he wanted me to at least meet his eldest (the one he had right after high school). But I knew this wasn't going to last and I didn't want his kids to get used to me being around. I was right - he dumped me without telling me after a five month affair. For his kids' sakes, I'm GLAD they never knew of me.

Being that I'm in my 30's I'm aware that anyone else my age is going to end up having kids. (Which is hilarious because everyone in school swore up and down I'd be the first to have them and I'd have a dozen - and it turns out they're having the kids and I don't have any.) I'm ... uneasy with the idea right now. I want to be his emotional priority (for once in my life), and that's near impossible when there are children involved. And, of course, it goes right back to the 'I don't want them to get used to me and then we break up'. I just want to avoid dating fathers when I do start seeing people.

I may change my mind if that's all there is left, though.

God, this is depressing.
11/11/2010
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Kimbertrees
Would you date someone that has a child/children from a previous relationship?
I'm certainly not in the market for dating right now (in a long term relationship) but I have kids, plenty of them, it would be ridiculous of me to not date a man because he has them.

I like kids, a lot, so it wouldn't be a problem. Unless he was a hitter. I wouldn't date a man who hits children for ANY reason.
11/11/2010
Contributor: Alicia Alicia
I met my husband after a break up. I didn't know at the time but I was pregnant by my ex. I figured he'd not want to date me after he found out but he still did. He was only 21 and I was only 19. We didn't actually date until after my daughter was born, but that was my choice not his...we had just both been through break ups and needed the time to heal before getting into a relationship. My now husband stepped right in and was an awesome father since day 1. Was it what he was planning for his life at that point in time? No, but luckily it didn't stop him from adjusting his life plan for me.

So I guess basically what I am saying is that those who wouldn't be stopped from a relationship simply because the person has kids I applaud you, it's not an easy thing to do but it's horrible for someone who has children to feel that they'll never find someone because they have "baggage" as many see it.
11/11/2010
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
I've dated a single mother before. It's very much a person by person situation. I'm not in the market now either, but if I was, I would wouldn't rule it out.

The age of the child(ren) matter too, quantity too. I wouldn't date a woman with more than one or two kids either. I firmly believe in over-population and wouldn't want to add more to it by having more than 3 or more kids. So, if she already had 2 or 3 kids, I wouldn't feel comfortable having another on top of that.
11/11/2010
Contributor: LikeSunshineDust LikeSunshineDust
At this point in my life (if I was single), no. I'm not ready to be a mother figure.
11/11/2010
Contributor: LicentiouslyYours LicentiouslyYours
I'm a single mom—so someone else having kids doesn't bother me although, to be honest, I think I would prefer the kids lived with the other parent rather than the one I'm dating.

Scheduling time to date around my kid is challenge enough without trying to work around someone else being primarily responsible for their kids.
11/11/2010
Contributor: Waterfall Waterfall
I am not sure. At this point I do not think that I am ready to handle someone with kids. It would also depend on who the kids lived with. I do not know if I am ready for a relationship where someone moves in and also brings kids with them.
11/11/2010
Contributor: Jenn (aka kissmykitty) Jenn (aka kissmykitty)
Quote:
Originally posted by Kimbertrees
Would you date someone that has a child/children from a previous relationship?
No. I've got enough of my own baggage to deal with!
11/12/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Not only would I, I currently am.
11/12/2010
Contributor: jdloelo jdloelo
Being on the other side of that fence, as a single mother, of course I would. I like to date men that already have kids so I don't have the pressure of worrying about him insisting on more children if it ever worked out. I have two and in no way want to have any more, but being a step mom is no big.
11/13/2010
Contributor: Avant-garde Avant-garde
I wouldn't because I dont want children, but if I change my mind getting into a relationship with a woman that has a pre-started family would be a good option.
11/13/2010
Contributor: Sapphire Pet Sapphire Pet
I don't have a problem with it but I'm old so most guys my age have been in a relationship and chances are they have kids. I love kids though. I do insist on dating for a bit before meeting the kids though. Seems I get attached to the kids and then the dad is an idiot and I end up missing the kids. It's a tough situation but if h had kids it's not a deal breaker for me.
11/13/2010
Contributor: lamira lamira
Right now, no. Especially since I don't want kids now.
11/13/2010
Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
I've dated a single mother before. It's very much a person by person situation. I'm not in the market now either, but if I was, I would wouldn't rule it out.

The age of the child(ren) matter too, quantity too. I wouldn't ... more
I agree with this.
11/14/2010
Contributor: Trashley Trashley
IHATEKIDS.

But I wouldn't mind dating someone with kids. All the fun without the hassle!
11/14/2010
Contributor: Sera Sera
Quote:
Originally posted by Kimbertrees
Would you date someone that has a child/children from a previous relationship?
Yeah, definitely.
11/14/2010
Contributor: Emma (Girl With Fire) Emma (Girl With Fire)
Quote:
Originally posted by LicentiouslyYours
I'm a single mom—so someone else having kids doesn't bother me although, to be honest, I think I would prefer the kids lived with the other parent rather than the one I'm dating.

Scheduling time to date around my kid is challenge ... more
Ditto.

For me it would depend entirely on the person, their relationship with their previous partner, and how many children they had by how many different partners.

I know too many people with 3 or 4 kids from 3 or 4 different relationships, that is a BAD sign in my opinion and I would avoid a relationship with a person with that type of a history. Also their relationships with their children would be a HUGE factor.
11/17/2010
Contributor: Illusional Illusional
Quote:
Originally posted by darthkitt3n
I would not be interested in someone who already has kids. I just think it would be a little weird to have to discipline them or something.
Yeah, I'm 23.. and I just wanna have my own, not be stepmom.
11/17/2010
Contributor: Not here Not here
I don't want children of my own at this point in life, so I wouldn't date someone who already had kids. Of course, things change, so I'm not saying if my situation were different and I were older that my answer would be the same. But as of now, NO WAY!
11/17/2010
Contributor: Emma (Girl With Fire) Emma (Girl With Fire)
Keep in mind, somebody having children wont necessarily prevent you from falling for them.
11/17/2010
Contributor: gone77 gone77
It would depend on the guy or gal, but I wouldn't say I'm inclined to date someone who has a kid. Seems like it'd be too much of a hassle. I've helped raised enough kids and been around them 24/7 since I was 13, so I don't think I'd want to deal with them in a relationship.
11/17/2010
Contributor: Not here Not here
Quote:
Originally posted by Emma (Girl With Fire)
Keep in mind, somebody having children wont necessarily prevent you from falling for them.
Oh, absolutely. Love tends to be inconvenient, but that can be the beauty of it
11/17/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Emma (Girl With Fire)
Keep in mind, somebody having children wont necessarily prevent you from falling for them.
This is sooo true. I NEVER thought I'd be involved with someone that already had kids, but my man is amazing, and he's a great dad. The single inconvenience is that since we don't live together and he has 50% split custody of his kids (4 of them from his first and only prior wife), I don't see him as much as I might like to but that situation will work itself out in time.
11/18/2010
Contributor: celibacysucks celibacysucks
Quote:
Originally posted by Kimbertrees
Would you date someone that has a child/children from a previous relationship?
I honestly would prefer the other person to have children since I have a child myself because I would know that they were prepared for the reality of child-rearing.
11/18/2010
Contributor: Hot'n'Bothered Hot'n'Bothered
I voted yes.

Mainly because if something were to happen and I were to become single, I have 3 kids. And I would like to hope I wouldn't be completely off the market, and unapproachable. It would seem hypocritical to vote any other way.
12/14/2010
Contributor: PussyGalore PussyGalore
Being around children frustrates me because I forget they have an innocence that needs to be protected. I don't know how to explain it other than I have a really hard time treating them like children because i was never treated like a child. From the age of 5 on, I had chores, knew about the financial stress of the house, was responsible for getting myself up and dressed and fed for school.

The joys of single-parenthood! (Mom did an excellent job, if I say so myself.)
12/14/2010
Contributor: KnK KnK
Not now...I would probably consider it in the future, but I'm not ready to be a mommy to anyone... :?/ <---Does that look like a mustache to anyone else or am I retarded? I just did that a second ago on accident.
12/14/2010