Male advice sought but female advice welcome.

Contributor: 8thDeadlySin 8thDeadlySin
So I'm not new to the sex scene in anyway but when it comes to exploring the deepest corners of ones sexuality you can call me an amateur. I have used some toys with my girlfriend (mostly dildos and cockrings) but as far as experimentation goes I'm fresh out of thoughts. My girlfriend is slowly becoming a toy expert so I've decided to expand my borders so that we may both enjoy an ever-growing sexual journey. I'm 100% open and willing to try anything and would love input or ideas on toys for use myself, use on her, use together, for her use on me, anal play, prostate stimulation, etc., also I'm new to the thought of anal play and prostate stimulation so any information would be helpful.
02/09/2009
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Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Quote:
Originally posted by 8thDeadlySin
So I'm not new to the sex scene in anyway but when it comes to exploring the deepest corners of ones sexuality you can call me an amateur. I have used some toys with my girlfriend (mostly dildos and cockrings) but as far as experimentation goes ... more
Perhaps a penis sleeve worn during sex would be something for you to explore. Or a wireless toy like a bullet that one of you can control from across the room.
02/09/2009
Contributor: Champagne and Benzedrine (Roland Hulme) Champagne and Benzedrine (Roland Hulme)
Have you thought about a strap-on? It's pretty wild - not just sexually exciting, because of the whole power/gender dynamic, but also very pleasurable for both partners if you get the right strap on. This one's a good 'starter.' My wife used it on me and we both loved it. link
02/09/2009
Contributor: Jimbo Jones Jimbo Jones
I second the idea of looking into a strap-on for pegging and giving her a chance to do more of the thrusting. Stick to silicone for safe, softer toys for anal play. Prostate stimulation is a great area as well. Sometimes stiffer toys are better here like acrylic, glass, or metal. Some of these materials require a greater up front investment, but they will last longer and are easier to clean and maintain, so it's worth it.
02/09/2009
Contributor: tantric tantric
What rings have you tried? I cant say enough about Gear Essentials metal rings. Steel just provides such a different sensation, than anything else, plus I love to wear a ring all day, it adds a certain factor of sexual awareness.(sized properly you can wear a metal ring all day, It's only dangerous if your erect for long periods of time).

Take the anal thing slow and build up, you might want take a look at Tantus, expensive but worth it.

Has she used any masturbation sleeves on you, their not just for solo play. They can be great fun used with a partner.
02/09/2009
Contributor: Cinnamon Chambers Cinnamon Chambers
I recommend the beaded sleeves on here, as well as the gumdrop butt plug or the little flirt. Good luck and have fun!!
02/09/2009
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
I highly recommend trying out anal stimulation, but there are other things you can do. Have you tried a vibrator? The Hitachi Magic Wand types are the tops for stimulation, and you can get attachments like the Vixen Gee Whizzard that can make it a high-powered insertable toy that can be used anally or vaginally.

Pegging is really neat and intimate, but it's best to start anal play with something small and soft that can be worked by hand, either a dildo, plug, or prostate massager. Whatever you choose, I strongly recommend springing for silicone, as you can clean and sterilize it so that it can be used by anyone anywhere.

Before buying anything you might want to bring your girlfriend into the loop (if you haven't already). You can start off with some of the things you find interesting, and then see what her ideas are, and then you'll be able to feel out each other's fantasies, comfort zones, etc. first.
02/09/2009
Contributor: 8thDeadlySin 8thDeadlySin
Penis sleeve is something I've thought about but something she's not to crazy about but the masturbation sleeve might be something to try, what would be the best and safest materials as far as the sleeves go?

Pegging is one of the things we have discussed and was probably the hardest thing to ask her about but we have decided we are goin to work up to that, does anyone have any ideas on toys for prostate stimulation or anal play beginners? (and thanks to those have already help with that.)

I've never tried a metal ring because I dont know what, where, or how to measure for one, so that might be an idea, if someone wants to provide further info on that.
02/09/2009
Contributor: Nashville Nashville
Quote:
Originally posted by 8thDeadlySin
Penis sleeve is something I've thought about but something she's not to crazy about but the masturbation sleeve might be something to try, what would be the best and safest materials as far as the sleeves go?

Pegging is one of the ... more
Prostate for beginners- Bob is a good choice.

How to fit a metal ring: link

"To measure yourself for a cockring, take a string and slip it behind yours balls and tug it up around the top of your penis (where it meets your body). Mark the string on both sides where it comes together at a snugness that is comfortable for you. This measurement will give you your circumference, now take your circumference measurement and divide by pi (3.14.) This measurement will give you your diameter or ring size. It is recommended you do this a couple times to assure a proper measurement. Many adult stores have fitting rooms where a man can try out the proper size. We find that the most common sizes are 1 7/8” and 1 ¾”."
02/09/2009
Contributor: 8thDeadlySin 8thDeadlySin
Quote:
Originally posted by Nashville
Prostate for beginners- Bob is a good choice.

How to fit a metal ring: link

"To measure yourself for a cockring, take a string and slip it behind yours balls and tug it up around the top of your penis (where it meets your body). ... more
Perfect, thank you.
02/09/2009
Contributor: Nashville Nashville
Quote:
Originally posted by 8thDeadlySin
Perfect, thank you.
np
02/09/2009
Contributor: Cinnamon Chambers Cinnamon Chambers
link This is our favorite beaded sleeve. Good luck.
02/09/2009
Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Quote:
Originally posted by 8thDeadlySin
Penis sleeve is something I've thought about but something she's not to crazy about but the masturbation sleeve might be something to try, what would be the best and safest materials as far as the sleeves go?

Pegging is one of the ... more
The sleeve I linked to is not a masturbation sleeve; it's meant to be worn during sex (just fyi). Because they're software, something which had a maximum amount of silicone would be safest (100% would be best but TPR silicone wouldn't be horrible). However, jelly sleeves might feel bettter
02/09/2009
Contributor: Jimbo Jones Jimbo Jones
100% silicone masturbation sleeves are hard to come by, but Tantus does make one called the Stroker: link
Average Joe didn't give the Stroker very high marks though. There are quite a few TPR silicone sleeves out there, like the Head Honcho and these usually don't cost too much. Other materials feel more realistic like Fleshlights but are also porous and require more maintenance, so it's all in what you are looking for. Good luck!
02/10/2009
Contributor: 8thDeadlySin 8thDeadlySin
Yea, I actually ordered the head honcho last night after some research and reading some reviews on it. Not too mention the price is right. Thanks Jimbo.
02/10/2009
Contributor: Darkness Withinus Darkness Withinus
Quote:
Originally posted by 8thDeadlySin
So I'm not new to the sex scene in anyway but when it comes to exploring the deepest corners of ones sexuality you can call me an amateur. I have used some toys with my girlfriend (mostly dildos and cockrings) but as far as experimentation goes ... more
The cockrings and sleeves suggested are all excellent ideas. Depending on both of your comfort levels you could also look into basic bondage kits. Simple things like a blindfold can greatly enhance a lot of the sensations that you feel from all of the toys mentioned.
02/11/2009
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
If you're new to anal play a good starting toy is something that has a gradual, consistent taper so you can slowly insert it as the anus relaxes. The lack of bumps makes it easier to get a feel for how your anus works. I like my Tantus Bronco link for warmup, and there's a smaller version too, the Slim link. Before I found these, I really liked the Big Flirt (the Flirt link seems to be the current name for this plug), but it's a bit harder to get inserted cold.

Prostate massagers can be very fun too, and if you get something like the Crystal Wand link or the G-force link you can also use it on your girlfriend for G-spot stimulation (you can use most prostate massagers vaginally, but these two are the easiest to use).

Other, non-anal things that are fun sometimes are the slings/position pillows, some of which are inexpensive ( link has a selection), or (especially in combination with a blindfold) a bunch of sensory materials (I'm not sure what they're called officially) - you can get the ticklers online or make your own set with things like feathers, velvet, plush, different cloths, leaves, the sky's the limit. Food can also be fun if you haven't tried it yet - just remember "on, not in" for most of them (to prevent infections).
02/11/2009
Contributor: Chou Wang Chou Wang
Well not much to add here really. All areas covered so pick one or just go for all! As far as the material choice, I'd personally go for UR3, the best feeling ever. [Now I expect getting beaten up by the BactBuster squad ] But really if you use common sense, have no immune system defects, normal digestion and use antibacterial soap before and after (I'm using Fairy) nothing can really happen. As for long-term wear, I'd agree that silicone is the top choice.

The best masturbator on the market with quite a dodgy name is the Tenga flip hole.

Have fun!
02/11/2009
Contributor: 8thDeadlySin 8thDeadlySin
When is comes to the material of the toy I'm not a too critical unless it will be shared by AND and my lover, in that case I would, without a doubt, get a material that can be sterilized, but that being said I still prefer silicone either way (as of now).
02/11/2009
Contributor: Red Riding Hood Red Riding Hood
When my partner wanted to try anal play, he started with anal beads. I got interested in them myself after that. If you're making anal play the big event, you may want to go with something larger (strap-on, prostate massager, anal plug). But if you want a little stimulation with something else as the main event, you may want to see if she's interested in the idea of anal beads. When we both wear them, it's a pretty interesting experience and he says he finds it incredibly sexy. Also, you may want to consider exploring cockcages as well. They look more threatening than they really are and some designs are very alluring.
03/21/2009
Contributor: Perrin Perrin
Quote:
Originally posted by 8thDeadlySin
So I'm not new to the sex scene in anyway but when it comes to exploring the deepest corners of ones sexuality you can call me an amateur. I have used some toys with my girlfriend (mostly dildos and cockrings) but as far as experimentation goes ... more
My wife and I recently purchaced the aneros prostate massager and i absolutely love it before and during intercourse although it can be a bit messy since it tends to milk your prostate of seminal fluid. also the we vibe is a must have since it can be used during intercourse and gives stimulation to both participants.
04/23/2009
Contributor: Vibrator Happy Vibrator Happy
How about 69?
05/14/2009
Contributor: Yoda Yoda
On a night in, try using some scented oils on each other. Lots of it. Light some candles. Drink some wine. Start with some sensual full body massage, then move on to some mutually pleasing and experimental foreplay.
07/29/2009
Contributor: tantric tantric
I'm going too now recommend the nexus G-play small unisex massager, Even better than bob for starting out with P-spot play.
07/30/2009
Contributor: Kinky Skier Kinky Skier
Quote:
Originally posted by 8thDeadlySin
So I'm not new to the sex scene in anyway but when it comes to exploring the deepest corners of ones sexuality you can call me an amateur. I have used some toys with my girlfriend (mostly dildos and cockrings) but as far as experimentation goes ... more
if your into prostate stimulation, first try using her finger. This is a lot cheaper than a toy, and then if you dont like it, you aren't out some money. LUBE is important here friend. Also, look into tantus toys, or others, they have a lot on this website, and usually pretty cheap, like $30. go slow, enjoy it, then buy a strap on ha ha ha!
11/02/2009
Contributor: Kinky Skier Kinky Skier
Quote:
Originally posted by tantric
I'm going too now recommend the nexus G-play small unisex massager, Even better than bob for starting out with P-spot play.
i am really interested in the BOB, but it doesn't look like a good beginner toy. My first P spot toy was the pro touch plug. it feels a lot like a finger ,and for me (then) didn;t look like ap penis, though, im beginning to not care about that as much
11/02/2009
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
It's great to try out new things with each other. Through all the toys, plugs, and gizmos though, I've learned one thing: time.

The closer the couple feels to each other, the better the sex is. That means building trust and comfort. Sex toys are great for that. If the person trusts you with X, they'll trust you with Y. That trust grows and soon you'll be high-fiving each other after a great romp!
11/02/2009
Contributor: Madam Z Madam Z
Quote:
Originally posted by 8thDeadlySin
So I'm not new to the sex scene in anyway but when it comes to exploring the deepest corners of ones sexuality you can call me an amateur. I have used some toys with my girlfriend (mostly dildos and cockrings) but as far as experimentation goes ... more
Lots of breathing and conversations before the actual act. Lube and gentle massage to get you ready, then lube a finger then move to different size toys. A BJ while being fingered is nice. Is this as a plug or thrusting? A plug with a bullet can be stimulating while thrusting can intensify oral stimulation. Videos and couples classes are great.
Best of luck
12/28/2009
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Getting your gal gushing [ejaculating] is great fun. My wife loves the PureWand link. This toy is great because the large end is perfect for g-spot stimulation and the small end for prostate stimulation. For variety we've added the Alumina Flow link.

Every woman needs a great 'rabbit' vibe. The best I've found is the Decadent Indulgence link. At first my wife didn't care for the rotating shaft - but the hummingbird clit vibe drove her through the roof - now she likes the added internal stimulation of the rotations. It's a good lesson - patience and perseverance are usefu.

For fun - try the KamaSutra Honey Dust link. It gives you the fabulous combination of sweet and sexy - and the feathers are a great teaser.

If you're looking for additional ideas try these pod-casts from Sex with Jaiya link and Juicy Pleasures with Sheri Winston link.

My last suggestion is if you like sexy little nothings check out the micro g-strings from LolaLuna link and Intimate jewelry from Sylvie Monthule link.

Hope this helps!
12/28/2009
Contributor: Sensual husband Sensual husband
How about some light bondage. Blindfolds and being tied down so only one has complete control. Sex in public or cock sleeves can be fun or make love to her at an unexpected place or time....
06/22/2010