Has participating in the community made you the all-knowing sex-toy-wizard amongst your friends?

Has participating in the community made you the all-knowing sex-toy-wizard amongst your friends?

Gary Gary
I know that was kind of a long title, but... has it?

I have definitely found myself being an ambassador for promoting valuable information to people who like the idea of sex toys and having great orgasms, but normally they have very little experience and have been burned a few times on cheap low-quality products.

The biggest thing I encounter when talking to people about toys, is they always comment on how expensive they are. I tell them that it depends on how you look at it. If they have already spent $30.00 on something that didn’t work for them, broke right away, or caused physical irritation, it is understandable how they might be hesitant to spend $80 on something else that they know nothing about.

So, first of all, I point out to them how awesome having a great orgasm is - no one ever disputes this. Then I point out how they may have spent $2.00 on 12oz of water which you can get anywhere for free, or that they will spend $30 at the bar borrowing beer for a few hours, or even spend $50.00 on a pair of dress shoes to wear once. So how could spending $100.00 on something that is safe, will last a lifetime, and give you pleasure every single time you want to use not only be an investment, but a bargain?

Yes I know, not every expensive toy is ‘the one’; but if you buy safe materials, you will not experience discomfort. If you buy a quality item, that is well rated, you can expect a certain level of quality and performance; and in some cases a manufacturer’s guarantee against defects. At this point, even if this isn’t the best toy you will ever use, it will work for you until you find a better one, and also give you a better idea of what you like.
09/11/2009
  • Buy 3 Items for $70
  • Buy 3 Items for $50
  • Buy 3 Items for $30
  • Buy 3 Items for $20
  • Save 20% on Luxury Toys
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
Darling Dove Darling Dove
I've become somewhat of a sex toy guru, but my friends think I waste money on toys. I cant share your enthusiasm on expensive toys, I hate both the lelo clitoral vibes I have and everyone else loves them, but they just don't cut it for me. What then, do you say to someone who has already spent $50-80 on something that just didn't work? and yet, who has had things that are $6 and $12 work better than overpriced 'luxury' things that are only for the most sensitive of women?

In general though I have become the sex toy know it all. Like I said I get yelled at a lot for spending too much on toys. Even though I only buy them once or twice a year, my friends still think its irresponsible of me to have, say, a $130 vibrator or even $50 vibrators. They don't see that you should ever need more than one.
09/11/2009
Gary Gary
Quote:
Originally posted by Darling Dove
I've become somewhat of a sex toy guru, but my friends think I waste money on toys. I cant share your enthusiasm on expensive toys, I hate both the lelo clitoral vibes I have and everyone else loves them, but they just don't cut it for me. ...
I don't disagree with your point on some things being overpriced, but I was trying to generalize a little bit rather than write 1,500 words with way too much information.

But at times, you do have to pay for quality. I paid $100 for the Tenga Flip Hole, and it was so worth it! I still have it, it is still in excellent condition, and I like it so much that I am excited about buying the new Flip Hole Black that is coming out. So it can go both ways.
09/11/2009
Saraid Saraid
Quote:
Originally posted by Darling Dove
I've become somewhat of a sex toy guru, but my friends think I waste money on toys. I cant share your enthusiasm on expensive toys, I hate both the lelo clitoral vibes I have and everyone else loves them, but they just don't cut it for me. ...
My friends also think that. I told one I was buying a new vibrator and she said, "Don't you already have one?" They don't get it.
09/11/2009
Tuesday Tuesday
My sense is that most of my friends think that this older woman's relatively recent enthusiasm for sex toys is odd. Only one of them has started buying toys herself.
09/11/2009
...... ......
Quote:
Originally posted by Darling Dove
I've become somewhat of a sex toy guru, but my friends think I waste money on toys. I cant share your enthusiasm on expensive toys, I hate both the lelo clitoral vibes I have and everyone else loves them, but they just don't cut it for me. ...
I'm sorry but who are they to say anything to you about how you spend your money? It is yours right?

Anyway, Some of the pricier toys do work great. And yes so do some of the inexpensive ones.
09/11/2009
Nashville Nashville
My friends call me a know-it-all when it comes to toys, they tell me that about everything else though. I can't help but interject my opinion or advice into every single conversation- I have bad manners, what can I say?

But conversations from my friends usually start with, "So I was wondering...." and it's most often about sex or sex related items. Most of them think I'm a sex fiend but they hold what I have to say in high regard- I do tell them though, I have sex just as much as they do (no more) but that my husband and I just use "sexual aids" to make the experience better.

The one thing I constantly find myself going over and over about are hygiene practices when it comes to caring for your toys or what materials to embrace and what materials to avoid. I constantly find myself pushing safe materials because I know how I was when I bought my first toy- I bought this hunk of jelly that caused bacterial vaginosis.

The price issue is a constant. "I don't know... $50 for a dildo!" ... um, you spend $50 every 3 days at Starbucks. If you care so much about the coffee you put in your body, care so much about the sex toy you put in your body! I've actually sat down and given the pro's and con's of why to go for higher end toys and I actually keep a very nasty old jelly dildo (never been used, just been one of the toys that took up space) that melted, to show them what happens to those cheap toys that they would prefer to buy.

So while they're often annoyed when I try to pass on my "wisdom", in the end I've helped a few become a little more informed about what they put in their bodies and I've helped a few others pick out something really great for themselves or for their spouse.
09/11/2009
Femme Mystique Femme Mystique
Absolutely, and I love all the questions and being asked for recommendations.
09/11/2009
Heather Heather
Not a problem for me since I don't share any of this with anyone but my husband. I only have two actual toys, love them both, one was very cheap and the other on the expensive side. We like having the options and are willing to spend much more to keep things interesting and just have fun exploring. On a rare occasion I'll buy Starbucks coffee, I only own 5 pairs of shoes, buy clothes twice per year all because I'm cheap but am more than willing to spend whatever I can afford that month on a new toy, candle, oil, lube, intimate jewelry like nipple sheilds, cock rings.......What's more important to invest in, coffee, shoes or your sex life? I'm just learning how important this part of your life is for the whole person. My many thanks to EF and the community for opening my eyes. My husbands thanks you too.
09/11/2009
Darling Dove Darling Dove
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
I don't disagree with your point on some things being overpriced, but I was trying to generalize a little bit rather than write 1,500 words with way too much information.

But at times, you do have to pay for quality. I paid $100 for the ...
I understand that, I paid $130 for the eroscillator and I can already tell it's worth every penny. However its just worth noting that its not always the case that cost = quality. I have some under $30 vibes that I've had for years that are still going strong.

@Saraid
I know. I mean its not like people buy one movie or one pair of shoes or one *insert entertainment/self indulgence object here* and they're set for life.

@newme21
yeah, I know. But I'm not about to break off an excellent friendship just because on one occasion the person sticks their nose where it doesn't belong.
09/11/2009
Liz2 Liz2
My friends who ask me about toys sometimes wonder why use toys? I usually tell them that toys can make good sex better!
Also the issue of price; I do suggest having fewer toys but of higher quality. Many of my friends bought cheap toys that don't perform or simply just crap out obviously discouraging the user.
I guess down deep some women feel spending real money on sex toys doesn't feel good but buying cheap novelty toys is ok. I tell them good toys are an investment for me much like owning just two good suits (interviews,etc.) rather then many that don't do anything for me.
09/11/2009
SilverVixen SilverVixen
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
I know that was kind of a long title, but... has it?

I have definitely found myself being an ambassador for promoting valuable information to people who like the idea of sex toys and having great orgasms, but normally they have very little ...
I think being involved in our "sex community" really gives any of us who review on a regular basis a great chance to make a difference in the sex lives of others.

If you aren't embarassed about what you do and your friends know about it, it opens a whole new world for them. Where friends may have been shy at some point, they open up and express genuine curiosity about things. Heck some of my friends have been curious about toys (at all price ranges) most of their adult lives but they were just too embarassed to ask about them.

They all poke fun at first, giving me the Sue Johanson ribbing, but it's the ones that poke the most who are asking the most questions lol! I've had more private emails from one or both partners in a relationship asking about toys that might be fun to purchase. Half the time it's BOTH of the partners asking the questions, but the other one doesnt know about it. It's kind of sad! Both are curious, but they're missing out on each others fantasies because they aren't communicating with each other.

It's always awkward, but in mediating you can get great ideas about how to put two and two together. One friend always wanted to try vibes, but was too scared to buy one for his wife because she'd think he was a pervert. The wife was basically on another line telling me she wants a vibe and a cock ring for HIM, but was worried he'd think she wasn't happy with their current sex!

Heck, as long as people are spending money on something they enjoy by themselves, or with a partner - I say it's money well spent!
09/11/2009
Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Yes but it started before I reviewed toys, I think. I give out a lot of advice on toys I would recommend and I think most of my friends understand that I'm really into it so I rarely get negative responses regarding the number of toys I own or how much I would spend on them. It's funny because I probably only get the "Why do you need another one?" comments from my husband.
09/11/2009
deceased deceased
I did not have many toys as a child. A hockey stick and 2 pucks, a punching bag and gloves, a scalped one armed Tressie doll, and some water pistols and bow and arrows and thats it. Oh, and a soap maker. I want toys as an adult. I work hard, I work out hard. I need playtime.
09/11/2009
J's Alley J's Alley
Ok, so I am the go to girl for my friends and family when it comes to sex. My friends have been asking me sex advise since I was 17, and the other day my MOTHER of all people, called me to ask advise on buying a toy. I am not sure yet if I am flattered or disturbed (I think flattered that she would ask ME for advise). My sisters call me a few times a week with "is this weird" questions and my best friend and her boyfriend both call me for advise. The funny thing is I began having sex AFTER all these people

I am always quick to send them here so they can look at what they are interested in and read reviews. Plus I love recommending lubes...no idea why. When they say "you spent HOW MUCH?" I point out that they easily spend that in one week on cigarettes or one or two trips to the movies. The only difference is my toy will be here longer than a week and I can use it for more than two hours of my life.
09/11/2009
Angel deSanguine Angel deSanguine
I have always been kind of the go to friend for sex questions, it just ratcheted up a few notches when I told them I am part of the Edens community.
09/11/2009
Angel deSanguine Angel deSanguine
Quote:
Originally posted by Angel deSanguine
I have always been kind of the go to friend for sex questions, it just ratcheted up a few notches when I told them I am part of the Edens community.
Oh, and I have never gotten the 'do you need another one?!?' instead I get the 'what did you get this month?!?!'
09/11/2009
Naughty Student Naughty Student
I really enjoy talking about sexuality and toys with my really close friends or my sister and mother. I find that amongst the things I talk of the most, material and cleanliness is my top two.

I don't usually give advice, I tell my friends what works for me and we share information and give each other new ideas.

I often have helped my sis and mom in finding an appropriate product in their price range that was made of quality and that would satisfy them. One of my friends has been really interested in trying toys and she's been ordering from EF more and more.

I had one friend that often told me "I'm not there yet in my relationship". My interpretation of this is that she thought our sex life was shity and we needed toys to enhance it which is not the case. I think she has a misperception of it but sadly we are no longer communicating with each other (and it has nothing to do with the sex toys, lol).
09/12/2009
Rayne Millaray Rayne Millaray
Not just my friends. M's coworkers come to me for advice, now.
09/12/2009
Maiden Maiden
I've also been the go to person for sex advice, but especially for toys. I have taken many friends out for their first porn store experience and helped them pick out their first toys. A lot of people don't understand that toys are not a replacement for sex, but an ADDITION to it.
09/12/2009
ToyGeek ToyGeek
Nobody knows I own even a single sex toy, let alone anything about my reviews, and it'll stay that way. Not only am I wildly uptight and easily embarrassed in real life, but when I showed a friend the Wired article on the Sasi, in the context of discussing artificial intelligence, the reaction was not positive.

@ Darling Dove -- I only own one pair of shoes, and they're six years old. It's all about priorities, I guess. And also, making a really good purchase. (They're three hundred dollar shoes.) So you never know. Anyway, nobody has the right to look at how someone else spends money and make judgments about it.
09/12/2009
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
I know that was kind of a long title, but... has it?

I have definitely found myself being an ambassador for promoting valuable information to people who like the idea of sex toys and having great orgasms, but normally they have very little ...
I have found that when people question my polyamorous lovestyle I can point out that if you are interested but not ready to jump right in a special toy named "Bob" or "Brenda" can simulate the experience of a threesome without the emotional baggage of a full on poly relationship. A blow up doll with a strap on and some toys of it's own can also make the fantasy more real without risking the horrible fallout if an affair backfires. You can simply deflate "Barbie or Ken" and put them in a closet if they get mouthy and demand more time from the relationship. Besides what type of couples activity can you do that leads to hotter sex and more touching, stroking, tasting, teasing than sharing a whole toy chest of toys? You add into the mix the proper care and maintenance of the toys and suddenly what was looked on as a pathetic way to get "her" off when he's not in the mood becomes a shared....ummm passion between two intrepid sexplorers! It's a wild and wonderful world is the world of Eden Fantasys!

I also point out that some of the most inexpensive toys last forever and can become truly a favored toy...exploring and trying out new things is the first advice given out by any marriage/relationship counsellor so dang it we should all listen to the "experts"!
09/14/2009
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by Darling Dove
I've become somewhat of a sex toy guru, but my friends think I waste money on toys. I cant share your enthusiasm on expensive toys, I hate both the lelo clitoral vibes I have and everyone else loves them, but they just don't cut it for me. ...
GASP they just don't understand how lonely that one little vibe gets! Each toy offers just a bit of the unique to my mind. It's like different chocolates...now I like me a Hershey Bar but a Godiva Truffle???? MMMmmmmMMMMMmmm you just gotta have some variety!
09/14/2009
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
I don't disagree with your point on some things being overpriced, but I was trying to generalize a little bit rather than write 1,500 words with way too much information.

But at times, you do have to pay for quality. I paid $100 for the ...
Now THAT'S variety! They say once you go Tenga Black you never go back...
09/14/2009
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by Naughty Student
I really enjoy talking about sexuality and toys with my really close friends or my sister and mother. I find that amongst the things I talk of the most, material and cleanliness is my top two.

I don't usually give advice, I tell my ...
Wow what a terrible thing to think about any relationship! It seems that if you are adventurous and have a partner that shares your enthusiasm for something outside the whole 'missionary in the dark sex' you are automatically having problems in your marriage/relationship! Oh well we know better...these attitudes reflect the problems in their relationships rather than in ours!
09/14/2009
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGeek
Nobody knows I own even a single sex toy, let alone anything about my reviews, and it'll stay that way. Not only am I wildly uptight and easily embarrassed in real life, but when I showed a friend the Wired article on the Sasi, in the context of ...
Aww that's a shame that you had such a negative experience discussing a toy...still being discreet is perfectly fine. You are happy and satisfied and that's what really matters.
09/14/2009
spicywife spicywife
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGeek
Nobody knows I own even a single sex toy, let alone anything about my reviews, and it'll stay that way. Not only am I wildly uptight and easily embarrassed in real life, but when I showed a friend the Wired article on the Sasi, in the context of ...
I only own two but that's both because I have a hard time finding shoes that fit and because I don't like owning too many pairs (takes up too much valuable room!).
09/15/2009
spicywife spicywife
My friends are too prude or shy to talk about sex toys. It would be nice to have friends to chat about that with though, as there is nothing wrong with it and it would be great to be able to be open about it!
09/15/2009
Gary Gary
I just thought of a funny, semi-related story. I have a friend (who is a carpenter), that just got out of a messed up rebound relationship. His ex, used to freak out on him about having porn at the house that he owned, (I am sure this conversation could either way about that one, but she moved in for a few months after he bought the house). I have learned that you can never really point out to someone that they are in a bad relationship; either they already know but stay anyway, or they are blind to it and get offended.

So whenever he would talk to me about stuff, I would always try to make him laugh instead of just saying "if she won't do anything at the house, pay any bills, and doesn't come home sometime, just kick her out". So the one time in particular he was telling me about how she found, and threw away his porn stash. So I suggested that he cut a hole in the ceiling somewhere and put in a fake air vent. He could then remove the cover and keep his stash in the ceiling almost in plain site. I knew he wouldn't do this, but it made him laugh.

The following week was his birthday, and that week they broke up and she moved out. So I bought him a Fleshlight... and they lived happily ever after.

The End!
09/16/2009
Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
I just thought of a funny, semi-related story. I have a friend (who is a carpenter), that just got out of a messed up rebound relationship. His ex, used to freak out on him about having porn at the house that he owned, (I am sure this conversation ...
Yay!
09/16/2009
  • 1
  • 2
Total posts: 42
Unique posters: 31