Rascal Ass Thumper - vibrating probe discontinued by Topco Sales - review by Spicy Sunday

The Rascal Ass Thumper is 11 inches (over 9 inches insertable) of seriously intimidating vibrator. At the time that we ordered it, my partner and I had been experimenting with various sized plugs and dildos, and in our excitement, I think we made one of the top mistakes in online sex toy shopping - we didn't look at the dimensions carefully enough. Sure, we saw that the toy was large, but we just didn't stop to really think about the numbers. So let me state the dimensions, just so everyone is on the same page. This vibrator is 2 inches in diameter, 6 1/2 inches in circumference, over 9 inches insertable, and 11 inches total length. It weighs in at a hefty 1.5 pounds. Although by its name, the vibrator was designed for anal use, it is not designed with any specific flare at the base to prevent it from being drawn into the body; however, because of the extreme length and the relative rigidity of the toy, this may not be as much of a concern as with other, smaller toys (although potential users should still be aware of this issue).

Although this vibrator was ostensibly designed for anal use, it could also theoretically be used anywhere you can...fit it. However, it has one major design flaw that prevents it from fitting anywhere very comfortably - the tip is not tapered at all, and has an almost square shape. Ouch! After trying and failing to use it for its intended purpose as an insertable vibrator, we also explored using this toy as a general external vibrating massager.

I only used (or more accurately - tried to use) this toy with a partner, but its long length might make it ideal for some solo play situations where extra length would be helpful for controlling the toy. In the end, we just couldn't get around the non-tapered design of the tip and the sheer massive size of this toy, but if you are an advanced insertable vibe aficionado looking for something with a diameter of 2 inches and a very generous length, this might be the toy for you.

This toy is made of somewhat yielding smoky gray translucent PVC plastic around a rigid core. The material has some give to it, like rubber. It had a slight plasticky odor when it came out of the package. Information at Topco's website lists "becomes slick when lubricated" as one of its qualities. We didn't notice that it held on to either water- or silicon-based lube exceptionally well, but it didn't "drink" lube either.

The sides of the toy are rippled all the way up the shaft, and there were no rough edges or seams that we noticed. Although it is advertised as waterproof, I am a bit wary of the design of the speed dial and battery compartment, so I would personally only feel comfortable using it as a "splashproof" toy, and not a waterproof toy.

This toy is designed for ADVANCED users only. The sheer size, 2 inches in diameter, along with the flat, blunt, square-shaped tip, means that this toy is not for the average vibe user. For us, even with warmup from other butt plugs of increasing sizes, the combination of both the size and the shape of the tip of the shaft thwarted all of our efforts at insertion.

We took a break to regroup and to thoroughly clean the toy with toy cleaner. Since the motor was (initially) strong and the vibe was focused on the tip of the shaft, we experimented with using it as an external vibe all over the body. Even using the variable speed dial, we were unable to settle on a speed that really felt good anywhere. We set it aside until a few days later, and when we came back to it, the dial mechanism for controlling the vibrations had broken and now the toy only had an "on" mode and an "off" mode. I believe it was safely within our toy drawer the whole time, so I am not sure what caused the mechanical failure, so buyer beware that the speed control may be fragile and prone to breaking.

Since we couldn't insert it, I can't say whether the vibrations are felt strongly when inserted, but the vibe is located at the tip of the shaft, away from the control dial. It is powered by 2 AA batteries, so it isn't extremely noisy, but consequently it isn't super powerful either.

This vibe is made of PVC plastic and should be cleaned with warm water and antibacterial soap or toy cleaner. Cover it with condoms if sharing or if using for insertion in more than one location on the body.

The packaging does not include any photos and has a plain bright red background with black lettering. The packaging is the molded plastic type and cannot be used later for storage.

Now with no hope of insertion (for us anyway) and eventually no vibe speed control, we wondered what to do with our poor, lonely giant Ass Thumper. Eventually our bainstormed ideas included using it as a club for impromptu sex toy mini golf ("fore!"), as a weapon for defending against home invasion, or a doorstop.

This toy is definitely not something that will work for everyone. Its size, its weight, and its blunt tip design mean that it is of interest only to people who are shopping for advanced user toys with very large girth, long length, some texture (the ripples along the shaft) and some vibration (provided to the tip of the shaft). Despite the overall heavy and solid construction of the shaft part of the toy, we found the "dial" vibration control mechanism very easy to break, so buyers should also be aware that this part of the toy could be poorly made or fragile.

In our opinion, the strength of this toy is its insertable dimensions, being both long and quite wide. The vibrations, although initially strong, seemed to wane quickly (we did not end up replacing the batteries for further use, so new batteries may have helped this issue). The vibrations are also focused on the tip end of the toy, which may or may not be what you are looking for.

In summary, we wouldn't buy this toy again, but could imagine that this toy could work well for someone looking for a heavy and large insertable that was less expensive than one made from metal or silicone.