The big boy - probe discontinued by Cal Exotics - review by Yoda

The "Big Boy", aptly named, is a not a precision tool. It's not meant to pinpoint anyone's "spot" of any kind, and it's certainly not meant to be displayed as art like so many glass and silicone toys of the current age. It is a big, blunt instrument designed to stretch, plunge, and twist its way towards your ultimate satisfaction. That is, of course, if you can make it fit.

Let me be clear, this toy is really meant for those that want significant girth. Use it vaginally, anally, both will feel quite nice. But once again, you should be aware of your limits if you plan to purchase this toy.

The "Big Boy" is made of jelly. Soft, yielding, most likely dangerous jelly. I found that, straight out the package, this toy really stank of chemicals and cheap, flower scented baby powder. It reminded me of the first jelly toy that I ever bought, down at the sleazy, old-dude-infested porn shop that still thrives in the slummiest part of my hometown. I read somewhere that even if you wash a jelly toy frequently, it will continue to emit chemicals, and will never lose that mass-manufactured smell. Needless to say, this bothered me quite a lot. And it really set the tone for a sub-par experience.

On top of the strong odor, jelly is known to be a notorious lint collector. I think I could probably get rid of my recently-bought micro-fiber dust mitten and use this vibrator to clean the house instead. Due to this problem, this toy would have to be rinsed thoroughly before each and every use.

Personally, I like the shape of this toy. It was what caused me to request it in the first place. It features a large, bulbous head that is smooth all the way around. This tapers down slightly to the shaft, which features a small ridge that coils around its length like a candy cane. This ridge is soft, and adds some nice texture during penetration. If you want to use it for anal, no problem. It has a flared base, and will sit nicely between your cheeks without going for a ride inside.

The size, however, presents a slight conundrum for me. At 2 inches diameter, and an insertable length of 5.5 inches, there are people out there that would have no problem inserting this toy, and would probably count the size as one of "Big Boy's" best features. I am not one of them. I thought I was, but was dead wrong. While the surface of the toy is soft and flexible, this surface is but a thin layer. Beneath this surface is a hard and rigid center that makes "Big Boy" a toy that barely yields at all. When I tried to insert it (anally), I could not get past the head. Some of you will not have this problem, whether used vaginally or anally, but I suspect that many of you will.

Please consider my warning: Know your limits!

I found that "Big Boy" functioned adequately in terms of vibration. It's not the most powerful vibrator ever, but it's not the weakest either. In one word, I give it a "meh". The vibration is focused in the head, while the traditional twist controls are located in the base. Is it easy to use? Of course is it, much like my electric razor is easy to use. I turn it on, and away I go. There's not much else to it.

Beyond that, there really aren't any other features here. The vibration is adjustable, but there are no patterns. The power doesn't really last all that long, but then again, I think it depends on the batteries you use, as well as the setting you use it at. As for noise, I'd say it's on the louder side, although it certainly won't cause any light fixtures to rattle. And for power, let's say that if "Big Boy" were a salsa, it would be medium-mild.

Jelly is tough stuff to keep clean and free of debris. It can't be boiled like silicone, yet simple soap and water is not enough to kill bacteria that can live in jelly's porous surface. My usual routine when it comes to jelly toys is to wash them with a gentle soap first, and by gentle I mean one that isn't too harsh and is mostly made from natural ingredients. Then I spray the toy with an antibacterial/antiviral cleanser. This makes the toy safe for my own re-use, but keep in mind that it's generally not a good idea to share jelly toys with others, simply because they can never truly be 100% germ free.