A dolphin-shaped, triple disappointment

This toy has weak craftsmanship, a backwards design, and a cumbersome dick-pinching excuse for a pleasure device. I can't believe Jesse put her name on this product. Love ya babe, but your toy is trash.
Published:
Pros
It might vibrate occasionally.
Cons
WAY too expensive for what you are getting.
Rating by reviewer:
1
extremely useful review
After going through a number of vibrating cock rings that were either too weak or too uncomfortable, my girl and I thought we would try out Jesse Jane's Triple Orgasm. When it arrived in the mail, I was so excited to see it that I ripped it open before I even got in the house. The box was a little big for a cock ring (6.5x4x2 inches). After opening it, I could see why the box was so big. The silicone dolphin is about the size of a small hamster. This was the first problem I recognized.

When you read the measurements on the description page of the item, you don't realize how big the toy is. It's about 1 3/8" at its widest point, but it's also an inch thick from front to back. That means when you put it on, your lady is deprived of over 25 millimeters of your sweet salami! Now that may not be a problem for guys like you and me, but some people need all the help they can get.

I set the dolphin aside and pulled the vibrators out of the box and was delighted at what I had found. At first glance, the vibrators seemed to be made of high quality plastic, with a nice on-off switch, and ton of batteries. Upon closer inspection, my excitement unraveled into more disappointment. I attempted to install the batteries to find no battery diagram in sight. So, if you aren't well versed in the art of vibrator/watch battery installation, this may take some trial and error.

As I began installing the batteries flat side up, I noticed a familiar white dust around some of the joints of the batteries. This is dried battery acid, and it is potentially harmful if you were to say, rub it all over your lovers wet pussy. I'm no chemist, but that seems like the last thing you would want to do. I threw away all the bad batteries and luckily had just enough to fill the vibrators. Not that that mattered because both were reluctant to work. I smacked, and wiggled, and reinstalled, and cleaned, and finally got them to buzz for more than a few seconds. I understand cutting corners and under-engineering, but there is no excuse for leaky batteries and a product that simply doesn't work. (This was 3 weeks ago, and I'm still pissed.)

After taking a paper clip and reworking the battery terminals, I got one of the vibrators to function reliably, so we tried it out. It is not recommended that you use any product like this with a condom because of risk of tearing due to friction. Friction between your condom and the dolphin will ultimately result in failure of the condom and a cream filled cuddle buddy. While we are on the topic of safety, if you are planning on a marathon romp, use the dolphin in 30 minute rotations. Cock rings should only be used sparingly because cutting off circulation to your junk for extended periods of time could do serious damage and it is just plain mean. If you do not plan on using condoms or lube, be aware that pinching and binding of cock flesh does occur during use of this product.

My final complaint springs back to my previous comment on the size of the product. Because it is so large, while you are grinding on your partner, the dolphin is constantly trying to escape from between your uglies. It is always moving around and rotating to the side. I spent most of my time either readjusting or simply vibrating the inside of her leg. If I was without girth, I would understand all the movement, but that is not that case.

For washing, because silicone is usually pretty good about not harboring bacteria, you can just scrub it with a good hand soap before and after each use. I would be very careful about washing the vibrators. Since they are of such poor quality, I'm not sure that they are all that water resistant.

If anyone has any questions or comments please feel free to leave me a message. I love hearing from you, and I would be happy to help you find a quality product.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

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My Jesse Jane's triple orgasm tags
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Can be worn during intercourse
    • Couples
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  • ~LaUr3n~ Contributor: ~LaUr3n~
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  • Contributor: Badmew
    Thanks for the review!
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