Intimacy massager - clitoral stimulator by Cal Exotics - review by Bad Influence Girl

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Intimacy massager sex toy review

I tried each of the heads twice while trying to move the massager around and vary the pressure.  No go, either it's hardly touching me, beating me up, or not working at all (due it being pressed too firmly against my flesh). 
Published:
Rating by reviewer:
1
useful review
I have previously used and enjoyed toys made by California Exotic, so I was quite excited when their Intimacy massager arrived in the mail.  I was less excited when I learned that it takes AAA batteries rather than the standard watch or AA batteries, but I persevered.  I even was less excited still when it took me three tries to figure out which way the batteries fit in (the picture is counterintuitive at best) and each time the battery cover required a struggle.

Okay, batteries are in, heads are cleaned and ready to go, and I'm horny.  All signs point to go.

I started with the little paddle head and tried it on low; not terrible but not too great either. It rattled around on my clit like a little pink jackhammer and somehow pushed both too hard and not hard enough at the same time.

Okay what about high? Ouch!  Not horny enough for that yet.

Alright, time to try the other heads; which required me to turn off the toy, change the head and lube it up.  I tried each of the heads twice while trying to move the massager around and vary the pressure.  No go, either it's hardly touching me, beating me up, or not working at all (due it being pressed too firmly against my flesh).  I really struggled with the Vrooms on this one because the pressure is very strong if you hold it exactly right, but it's extremely easy to bind it and make it stop moving as well.

Eventually I got horny enough to really go for it with the toy and it drove me to somewhere near an orgasm before it hurt far too much for me to continue.  After a while I got tired of beating up my delicate parts and I threw the toy aside to finish with my finger.  I was now too sensitive to do so, even with the help of my lover and his talented hands on my G-spot (not to mention the great visual of him playing with himself while he watched me test the toy). I was forced to actually stop without ever achieving orgasm.

I do not recommend this toy at all.  In fact it may be the worst toy I've ever tried. 
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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Comments
  • Dragon
    It may be one of your worst toys, but it's the funniest review I've read today...  I'm surprised that you didn't advocate it under the BDSM section!
  • lol

    you know that never occurred to me but now i sort of wish that it had! 
  • Dame Demi
    It looks...clunky, at best.  Sorry it gave you such a beating.  :(  Good review, though!
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