I honestly don’t know what I was thinking when I bought the Platinum Fusion II|Platinum fusion II. This is by far the largest sex toy I’ve ever attempted; I should have known there was no way my little kitty could handle this monster. It had been a while since I’d gotten laid… and I guess my eyes were bigger than my… you know.

I was impressed with Grrl Toyz; the vibe lured me in with a host of bells and whistles. It had those amazing looking metal beads in the head. It had three separate vibrating eggs on the shaft, which was also ridged. It had yet another large looking egg in the clitoral attachment. It had so many features, it came with a free silver bag for storage… and it was pink.

When I took it out of the package at home, I was overpowered by the smell of plastic. It gave me a headache, and handling the toy got the noxious odor all over my hands as well. I washed the toy as instructed and set it out to ‘air’. A week later it still smelled awful but I got out a condom. The condom covered most of it, but not the clitoral attachment.

I started out using the top, with its rotating beads, to massage my clit. That felt pretty damn good and had me ready to go in no time, but when I tried to slip it in… I hit an impasse.

Did I mention this toy is HUGE? Because the biggest part of it is the enormous bulbous head, I found it very hard to achieve penetration, even with added lube. Chalk it up to determination or stupidity but I finally got it in…

I will say I have never felt anything like this toy. The rotating beads feel amazing on your g-spot (and the toy filled me to capacity, and so it was massaging ALL my spots at once). It only produces a medium amount of noise for such potent hardware. The clitoral attachment, an elephant, is quite powerful. The long snout and two tusks tantalize and tease your clit just right. At first I had trouble figuring out the controls, but once you do, it has an impressive array of settings… just scroll through and you are guaranteed to be kept surprised and delighted by the various combinations of pulsation, vibration, and rotation.

I did climax hard with this toy, several times in a short period. However, the pain far overshadowed the gain. I was hurting for at least a week afterward. This toy is not for beginners, nor is it for the more petite vagina. I have also never had a toy smell so bad or irritate my skin this bad; this one made my clit feel like it was on fire. I took a shower immediately afterwards and still it was burned and chaffed for a week. Despite its good points, I have to give this toy only 2 stars because it’s just not usable for me.