The Horses' Mouths
Welcome to the Internet, where disembodied pieces of humanity sniff one another’s virtual rear ends in the hope of finding a suitable mount, distraction from the last failed relationship, leggy size-7s agreeable to shrimping or fairy-tale love connection resulting in everlasting harmony and successful exchange of DNA for means of procreation (must be Jewish or willing to convert).
Yes, yes, I know. Jaded, I sound. Sue me. Spend enough time sifting through the “Deep Space 9” haikus and rim-job requests and it gets old. Fast.
The pleasant irony unearthed? Although many online love seekers agree wholeheartedly with my observations, they remain steadfastly optimistic that the right person just might be out there amid the treacherous flotsam of the dating sites. Such is the human condition. The sitting President is not the only one out there with the audacity of hope.
Of course, this raging army of cyber gluttons, ever hungry for punishment, is fertile ground from which those wonderfully awful, Jerry Springeresque tales of online dating woe can be culled. Without further adieu, I give you a small collection of phenomenal failures: warped, perverse, comical, and right from the horses’ mouths.
Yes, yes, I know. Jaded, I sound. Sue me. Spend enough time sifting through the “Deep Space 9” haikus and rim-job requests and it gets old. Fast.
The pleasant irony unearthed? Although many online love seekers agree wholeheartedly with my observations, they remain steadfastly optimistic that the right person just might be out there amid the treacherous flotsam of the dating sites. Such is the human condition. The sitting President is not the only one out there with the audacity of hope.
Of course, this raging army of cyber gluttons, ever hungry for punishment, is fertile ground from which those wonderfully awful, Jerry Springeresque tales of online dating woe can be culled. Without further adieu, I give you a small collection of phenomenal failures: warped, perverse, comical, and right from the horses’ mouths.
Cool