ok, i used to be able to watch porn all the time. my husband and i have been together for 13 years. we enjoyed it often. we once decided to have a 4some. it was ok at the time, but after i regretted it and it took years to get the image with my husband with another women out of my mind. ever since then, i cant watch porn. i feel like there are others with us in teh bedroom and i feel like we are getting off more on others than each other. is this normal? my husband loves porn. so how do i get over this?
Porn makes me feel sick
01/07/2013
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That's a rough spot to be in and it sounds quite like there are some unresolved issues concerning the event. In order to get over your distaste for porn, if it's something you truly want to do, you should try talking out your feelings. Surely it's been long enough since the event that you can both look back and talk about it calmly. (If not then couples counseling sounds like the next step.)
You just have to have one conversation at a time until the wounds are no longer tender. I wish you the best of luck!
You just have to have one conversation at a time until the wounds are no longer tender. I wish you the best of luck!
01/07/2013
Quote:
thank you. yes we have talked about it. i am 100 ok with the issue now. it is the past and we are happier than ever. its just everytime i watch porn it flashes back to that time. not sure i can get over it. :/
Originally posted by
Ansley
That's a rough spot to be in and it sounds quite like there are some unresolved issues concerning the event. In order to get over your distaste for porn, if it's something you truly want to do, you should try talking out your feelings. Surely
...
more
That's a rough spot to be in and it sounds quite like there are some unresolved issues concerning the event. In order to get over your distaste for porn, if it's something you truly want to do, you should try talking out your feelings. Surely it's been long enough since the event that you can both look back and talk about it calmly. (If not then couples counseling sounds like the next step.)
You just have to have one conversation at a time until the wounds are no longer tender. I wish you the best of luck! less
You just have to have one conversation at a time until the wounds are no longer tender. I wish you the best of luck! less
01/07/2013
Quote:
I kind of had the same problem at one point. I'm probably going to be flamed for this but I had to objectify the women in the scenes. They were "dirty whores, sluts who would take a dick any time, any where". I had to kind of project the left over hurt and anger onto them. They weren't real after all. That wasn't lovemaking happening up there - that was fucking and I can fuck better than most. It was therapeutic. No one was getting hurt and I could safely express those emotions and now I can watch just about anything and it doesn't bother me.
Originally posted by
captainsgirl
thank you. yes we have talked about it. i am 100 ok with the issue now. it is the past and we are happier than ever. its just everytime i watch porn it flashes back to that time. not sure i can get over it. :/
Besides, you always want to be leery of the women in a man's life which he does not speak of, not the ones he does.
01/07/2013
Having spoken to men who watch porn the overwhelming feeling is that they are not imagining being with that woman they are watching her and remembering times in their lives they had a similar encounter. It is a depersonalizing event and it is NOT a situation where they are wishing to be with some other woman.
It is theater...the same as watching a R rated movie. These are actors and no matter how much fun they are having they are not real emotions they are portraying.
It is theater...the same as watching a R rated movie. These are actors and no matter how much fun they are having they are not real emotions they are portraying.
01/07/2013
You need to own it again instead of letting the past own you. You have to find the way to do that that works for you.
01/08/2013
Total posts: 6
Unique posters: 4