Number one reason for breaking up?

Contributor: Pablo F Lleras Pablo F Lleras
well i was just sitting there when i started to wander, why do people break up so often?, i listed some stuff but if i'm missing anything please explain. i'm sure i missed a lot so please add all you want
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Cheating :(
85  (41%)
Don't get along
47  (23%)
No longer feel that
34  (17%)
Sexual issues?
6  (3%)
Family issues?
2  (1%)
And the famous Other....
32  (16%)
Total votes: 206
Poll is closed
05/18/2011
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Contributor: married with children married with children
most of my friends that have divorced their partner, have done so because one of them cheated.
05/19/2011
Contributor: Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
Of the people we know there seems to be a trend that all comes down to a lack of honest communication or willingness to compromise (aka immaturity on one or both parts). Then there are the ones who got together for the wrong reasons to begin with, and then wonder why it falls apart later.
05/19/2011
Contributor: Amazing! :) Amazing! :)
I don't think it's cheating. It's the inability to communicate and trust each other.

And like what the person above me said. It's the fact that both people(Maybe all people depending on your situation.) have to be willing to compromise. Also, you have to be able to talk things through and not just end it right when something bad happens.

If a person cheated, in my opinion, it's for a reason. Maybe they didn't feel loved enough, or maybe they don't really love you anyway.Me and my lover have been through so much together, and every fight and downfall we go through we just get stronger as a couple.
05/19/2011
Contributor: Amazing! :) Amazing! :)
I don't think it's cheating. It's the inability to communicate and trust each other.

And like what the person above me said. It's the fact that both people(Maybe all people depending on your situation.) have to be willing to compromise. Also, you have to be able to talk things through and not just end it right when something bad happens.

If a person cheated, in my opinion, it's for a reason. Maybe they didn't feel loved enough, or maybe they don't really love you anyway.Me and my lover have been through so much together, and every fight and downfall we go through we just get stronger as a couple.
05/19/2011
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
I agree with both things Amazing! said! (Totally messing with you! )

When people stop talking, problems set in.
05/19/2011
Contributor: Novs Novs
Cheating...
05/19/2011
Contributor: kinksters kinksters
Quote:
Originally posted by Amazing! :)
I don't think it's cheating. It's the inability to communicate and trust each other.

And like what the person above me said. It's the fact that both people(Maybe all people depending on your situation.) have to be willing to ... more
agreed. communication is the make or break metric.
05/19/2011
Contributor: REDRUM REDRUM
Sometimes personality's don't jive intimately and emotionally. The only way you can really find that out is by experience. Which sucks. :p

Also, one person may be more committed or serious than the other and that usually causes a lot of break ups. (i.e. cheating)
05/19/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
I agree cheating (meaning having some sort of intimate relationship with an other person that your SO doesn't agree to and is fine with) is only a symptom.

Most marriages I know which break up have some cheating in them, but the cheating is usually a symptom of a poor sex life, a lack of talking to each other and a lack of listening to each other, unresolved anger and resentment, and of course not communicating.

I have to say, IMO, nagging is death to a relationship. I have seen it destroy so many relationships. If he doesn't "do what I want" shut up about it. It drives me crazy when my friends always want to control their husbands all the time. I have a friend who went out of town a few weeks ago, and she came to me and told me to "not let S. leave our son with you while I'm gone for any reason." I told her I love her son, and I'd help S. out if he needed me to. "NO!" she said, "It's his turn to watch him." This is the kind of shit that destroys relationships. I can see this one disintegrating in front of my eyes, too.
05/19/2011
Contributor: liilii080 liilii080
We no longer had the same life goals. When the future goals and dreams diverge I figure it's time to move on. Now that's a whole other story if you're married of course but in dating, if you can't compromise you know it's not right anymore.
05/19/2011
Contributor: CuteDee CuteDee
People grow apart... As you are together longer, you start learning more things about your partner. I also think their true colors start to show about 6 months in... Sad but true!
05/19/2011
Contributor: Linga Linga
Cheating would be first and foremost but nothing would be done without talking about it
05/21/2011
Contributor: froggiemoma froggiemoma
cheating , lack of trust and poor communication
05/21/2011
Contributor: Eucaly Eucaly
Usually it's getting into a relationship for the wrong reasons or with the wrong expectations, especially that expectation so many people seem to have that if you're real "soul mates" you'll never have any problems and therefore any problem is a reason to believe the relationship itself is wrong. No compromise, no negotiation, just sheer panic and meltdown.
05/21/2011
Contributor: NarcissisticLust NarcissisticLust
A mixture of everything but mostly, just wanting different things from life ended my serious relationships.
05/21/2011
Contributor: padmeamidala padmeamidala
Quote:
Originally posted by Pablo F Lleras
well i was just sitting there when i started to wander, why do people break up so often?, i listed some stuff but if i'm missing anything please explain. i'm sure i missed a lot so please add all you want
I think people break up when they don't get along anymore with each other. At least that's what has happened in my previous relationships. Cheating can be a big factor too.
05/23/2011
Contributor: Ajax Ajax
based off of the people that I know cheating and not having feelings for their other anymore are pretty even and common reasons
05/23/2011
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by Ajax
based off of the people that I know cheating and not having feelings for their other anymore are pretty even and common reasons
How do you get from madly in love to 'not having feelings for their other anymore'? They were either never really in love - or substantial neglect of the relationship has to have occurred. I don't mean physical neglect - but a failure to nurture the relationship.
05/24/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
How do you get from madly in love to 'not having feelings for their other anymore'? They were either never really in love - or substantial neglect of the relationship has to have occurred. I don't mean physical neglect - but a failure to ... more
You just grow apart sometimes too. It happens. In my previous relationships there wasn't a big huge failure to nurture, we both tried, but it wasn't the same anymore. Sure, only seeing each other on weekends didn't help that at all, but still even with constant communication we just didn't have the same feelings anymore.
05/24/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
i think its because a lot of people don't trust each other
05/24/2011
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
How do you get from madly in love to 'not having feelings for their other anymore'? They were either never really in love - or substantial neglect of the relationship has to have occurred. I don't mean physical neglect - but a failure to ... more
It does happen. Often when people grow and change, but don't change in the same direction. I wouldn't say that you don't have feelings for them, but that the nature of those feelings have changed. There are people in my life that I have, at one point, had romantic feelings for and don't anymore. It doesn't mean I don't still care for them. Quite the contrary, I care for them very much, just the nature of my feelings have changed.

Infidelity can be worked through. It's difficult. It's painful. It can work if you're willing to get to the root of the problem. That said, if Mr cheated on me again, I wouldn't work through it again. Twice was twice too many already and if it happens again, it's a pattern and his lack of respect for me than what I may or may not be giving him.

Deal breaker for me: Abusive language/actions towards myself and/or my children. Especially if it's intentional, and there is no remorse or desire to change.
05/24/2011
Contributor: toxie m toxie m
The main reason I've broken up with people in my lifetime is just each of us sort of outgrowing the other. Sort of a case of "no longer feelin' it" because we've become different people than we were at the beginning, and the new people don't have the same chemistry/bond/interes ts.
05/24/2011
Contributor: butterflygirlxo butterflygirlxo
Quote:
Originally posted by CuteDee
People grow apart... As you are together longer, you start learning more things about your partner. I also think their true colors start to show about 6 months in... Sad but true!
yes very sad, its hard when people grow apart especially when you been together for so long
05/24/2011
Contributor: LostBoy988 LostBoy988
If you dont get along its plain and simple that its not working out.
05/24/2011
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by LostBoy988
If you dont get along its plain and simple that its not working out.
That's not true! Mr and I don't get along a lot. Sometimes it's because there are issues that need resolving, but much of the time we just bicker. It doesn't mean we don't love each other or that it's not working out. We laugh together about as much as we bicker.
05/24/2011
Contributor: Lady Venus Lady Venus
Cheating or abuse.
05/24/2011
Contributor: Pixel Pixel
Cheating has been the main deal breaker for me. The only other time I've broken up with someone for reasons other than that was just because we were so different, and his constant neediness was making me miserable.
05/24/2011
Contributor: mariedoll mariedoll
Quote:
Originally posted by Amazing! :)
I don't think it's cheating. It's the inability to communicate and trust each other.

And like what the person above me said. It's the fact that both people(Maybe all people depending on your situation.) have to be willing to ... more
Well said
06/02/2011
Contributor: PiratePrincess PiratePrincess
Communication is the real issue but its a problem when it manifests in cheating
06/02/2011