This exactly! We talk about everything, even things that may hurt one another, because it's important to communicate openly and honestly with each other at all times. At least for us this works out the best and has for the past couple of years, it was a hard road getting where we are now but I'm glad we put in the time and effort to get here.

Well, this is my 3rd marriage so I learned a lot by my mistakes in the past! Before I got married this time my husband and I sat down and agreed we could disagree but to respect each other's opinions. We agreed never to argue about the kids discipline in front of the kids and to support the other in front of kids, even if you disagree and want to kick his ass, and finally, and MOST IMPORTANTLY we agreed NEVER, NEVER EVER go to bed angry and to discuss if anything is angering you before you go to sleep. This is what we do and we get along wonderfully and the third times a charm.

No contract. We love each other enough to just talk things out and not have to negotiate

I think communication is of utmost importance, no matter what. I am poly/non-monogamous and I am always upfront about how I prefer things. Compromise is key as well.

Wwe are still developing our relationship, which is a D/s relationship that will eventually have a contract. For now Wwe have a list of rules and protocols which are in developmental stages. When something doesn't work Wwe talk about how to change it so it does work, or may throw out a rule that is just not serving it's purpose. Wwe have open lines of communication at all times and Wwe frequently renegotiate things that aren't working. Wwe also have set time twice a month to talk about anything Wwe want where protocols are set aside and Wwe talk as equals. Wwe talk about the things that aren't working, things that are working, things Wwe each like and don't like, struggles either of Uus may be having, or just any feelings that either of Uus is dealing with. It's a time to celebrate successes and happiness, recognize and appreciate each other, as well as time to discuss problems or changes that may need to happen. This is a very successful method for us. i absolutely think that treating relationships as a negotiated contract that can be changed as needed adds longevity to relationships. It's wildly unrealistic to think that two people can be together for the rest of their lives and never change, that the relationship dynamic you establish early on will be exactly the same when you get to the end of your lives. Remaining static and unyielding only shortens the projected lifespan of the relationship, in my opinion. Flexibility and communication are key. People change, life happens, things come up you didn't anticipate, needs and desires may vary like the weather. The relationship needs to be adaptable in order to survive life's climate changes. This is a fairly common mindset in BDSM relationships but i think it is a model that can very successfully be applied to vanilla relationships.

For me it is all about fairness and equality. Both parties should be happy and get their way at least 1/2 of the time. If you simply can't agree on something, compromise is key. Its not always going to be fun or easy, but it will work if you are willing to give up your 50%!

Yeah, this! Contracts are for business partners and property. Talking and agreeing with each other is enough for us. Unless that is considered a contract.

I've definitely done some negotiating in my relationship. Before I ever had sex with my boyfriend I told him he needed to commit to being exclusively with me. I am probably the more demanding one on my relationship expressing my 'requirements/terms' easily and he seems happy to 'comply'. In theory either party can end the relationship however I would hope to at least get some respect with then ending. For example, we live together and pay bills together. Should either of us leave then we should explain that to the other and give sufficient time to make other arrangements. New terms are always up for negotiation

Do you consider a promise to be a spoken contract between each other?

We don't have a contract. We talk things out and find something that woks for both of us. But we don't really negotiate things...its never been needed

I agree with this 100%. More urgent issues need to be addressed sooner than later but there is always time to talk!

We have open comunication and try to comprimise. #billofrights

Contracts are an excellent idea, imho. Personally, I plan to put one into effect in my next relationship.

It is my opinion, based on observation and common sense, that contracts prevent a LOT of miscommunication, misunderstandings, breakups, heartaches, and pain. This seems to result from not knowing what one's partner's expectations are -- both of the other party and the relationship in general.

In my humble opinion, contracts are a necessary communication tool to use in defining the "rules" and expectations of relationships. I truly believe that if all couples did this in one form or another - however informal or formal - that there would be a lot less breakups, divorces, unhappy relationships, lying, cheating, etc.

Defining what's expected of both parties and what's "allowed" in the relationship from the get-go allows for clearer communication, more understanding, less cheating/lying, less breakups and divorces, and so on and so forth.

Also, while contracts are especially important in many BDSM/D&s/kink relationships, I wholeheartedly believe contracts can be incredibly useful in any relationship - even the most vanilla of couples.

In closing, I give contracts two thumbs up and five stars.

We don't think about our relationship as a contract, but we certainly do have certain expectations (honesty, monogamy, helpfulness, nonviolent communication, etc., etc.), and we've always been very clear about what they are. Mainly we try to foster open and honest communication. It's been working out for the past 6+ years.