*possible trigger* Do you believe prior abuse has modified how your sexuality is expressed?

Contributor: biggieaddict biggieaddict
I have had several female friends and acquaintances who are bi or gay, for some (not all) it seems as though some portion of their orientation is triggered by their experience. As if they had a safe zone to go to if needed, and a couple actually stated that it was their safe zone. (Though at least one was also sexually assaulted by a same sex "friend". That really messed her up, esp as she had been set up for it and another woman helped the "friend" )







For myself, I am *attracted* to women, and love giving oral, massages, vanilla and spiced sex and of course anal. I'm slightly fetishistic about that. On the other hand, I love solo anal/dildo play, but not pegging. Years ago I had some bi sex and it was ok, fun even -- but all I wanted was the cock, the rest of the guy was just a propulsion unit and I really wasnt attracted (nearly repelled) by any conversation or personal expression of the guy. Not even hunky bods. The exception were very large guys that weren't sloppy fat, were harmless looking, hairy and well hung...which incidentally gave them a resemblance to my grandfather, especially when they were so tall that it effectively proportionately reduced my size to a more childlike stature. And I wanted to be hurt. Maybe I still am, I am much more risk conscious than I used to be (prob as I have a kid now, kinda changes the score compared to when you just burn yourself if you really screw up) (no pun intended) Regardless of if it was a grandfather clone or not, even toying I am always the bottom.







To me it howls of reenactment issues, I cant speak for other bi guys or anyone else, just make a guess or listen if they speak out.







Male or female, what are your ideas or own experiences?







B
04/28/2011
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