The New Intimacy

Who chooses your sexual positions?

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Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
Last week, my b/f remarked that I am a "control freak" during sex as I always choose the position for the final thrusting prior to his ejaculation.
During foreplay we kinda go into a variety of positions and even here I indicate when its time to change. For the finale I just assume the position I want to be fucked and my b/f complies. This is also true of BDSM play as I give instructions here as well.
I suggested that perhaps he is watching too much porn where the guy seems to overpower the woman. I choose positions based on how I feel, aching muscles and just plain ole need or desire.
Am I way out there with my behavior??
Guys comments are also most welcome...
07/25/2010
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Contributor: Alicia Alicia
Quote:
Originally posted by Liz2
Last week, my b/f remarked that I am a "control freak" during sex as I always choose the position for the final thrusting prior to his ejaculation.
During foreplay we kinda go into a variety of positions and even here I indicate when ... more
We go back and forth. Sometimes I'll choose and sometimes he does. We usually just ask if the other wants to do a certain position...well ok I usually ask, he knows it turns me on for him to tell me to do something or to just do it, but he likes me on top first as it almost always gets me off no matter how many times I've already orgasmed during foreplay. So we usually start there and if he hasn't already said something or switched us before I am exhausted from riding I'll ask if he wants to and then he'll decide which position that he's in control of he wants to do...like..on top, behind, on edge of bed.


Oh also just wanted to comment that I hate in porn when it's all about the guy. I will fast forward through the scene if the woman is getting no attention to her needs and it's all about her pleasing the guy.
07/25/2010
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Our body's. lol.

For the most part I do most of the deciding at the start, after a while though one, if not both of our body's tell us it's time to move. Just not as young as we think.
07/25/2010
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
We both decide. But then again, we change positions about 5 or 6 times during one intercourse session.
07/25/2010
Contributor: LuLu Love LuLu Love
I think we pretty much equally decide...maybe he does a little more often but I still wouldn't put it at control freak status.
07/25/2010
Contributor: MuffysPinguLove MuffysPinguLove
It just happens for us, neither of us really decides it just kind of happens
07/25/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
I generally choose, sometimes she does. It depends.
07/25/2010
Contributor: trios trios
Quote:
Originally posted by Liz2
Last week, my b/f remarked that I am a "control freak" during sex as I always choose the position for the final thrusting prior to his ejaculation.
During foreplay we kinda go into a variety of positions and even here I indicate when ... more
I find that I try to feel my wife out during foreplay (literally!) with lots of touching everywhere, kissing everywhere, the occasional massage with oil, etc. Then we customarily start with missionary and it depends for us how she is doing. If she is heading towards orgasm, then we continue that way, otherwise she will request to 'flip around' and be on top. I am more than happy to oblige, as I know that this position is necessary for her to successfully orgasm.

Then if she finishes it is my turn and I choose the position. Lately we are experimentig with positions, so I am going to start out with whatever page I last turned to in the Kama Sutra. Of course if she needs to flip around by all means we will do so.

It is my opinion that it will benefit you both to let him choose his final positon for cumming. I know for myself how I want to end, and sometimes it changes. Sex should be fun, and it is no fun if someone always gets to make the rules or 'hog the ball' so to speak. It sounds like he is starting to become resentful, so go ahead- give it a try. Let him enjoy you might like his reaction!
07/25/2010
Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
Quote:
Originally posted by MuffysPinguLove
It just happens for us, neither of us really decides it just kind of happens
I never actually though about my role in choosing positions, I kinda thought it just happened but on reflection, I have been the driver, overall.
07/26/2010
Contributor: Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
He tends to flop me around as he wants me and I bonelessly comply as much as I can. Heh.
07/26/2010
Contributor: pinkzombie pinkzombie
Quote:
Originally posted by Liz2
Last week, my b/f remarked that I am a "control freak" during sex as I always choose the position for the final thrusting prior to his ejaculation.
During foreplay we kinda go into a variety of positions and even here I indicate when ... more
We just sort of roll into whatever...I don't really think either one of us controls the landing position.
11/22/2010
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Very interesting question - I like the ones that make me take a harder look at what actually happens in a relationship vs. what we think of as the norm.

Neither of us are doms - so there is no overt control - but there is more subtle pushing and prodding. I've concluded that it goes about:

50% me - flipping her over for a back massage or bit of back-door play (not anal sex) - or putting her on her knees for doggy style sex.

30% her - climbing on top for a cowgirl finish - she loves that - or pushing me onto my back for one of her signature BJs.

20% neutral - we just start out in the missionary position for warm-up and foreplay and like last night - that's the only position for the evening.
11/22/2010