Do you think the man makes the orgasm for a woman?

Contributor: Iggins09 Iggins09
I know this seems like a weird poll question but the object of my poll question is aimed at asking women who have not orgasmed during sex with any partner if they think that the way they feel about a man or how involved they are during the sexual act would encourage the sexual penetration orgasm. Guys you can answer too . If you have a different opinion, please share it .
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Yes, definitely
Iggins09 , SiNn , OhMy! , mistressg , Rossie , married with children , MIT09 , OrangeKushBB , Miss Anonymous , Apirka , gloomybear , deltalima , BlooJay , hall5885
14  (58%)
Not really, no
aliceinthehole , Ghost , M121212 , LAndJ , potstickers , ViVix
6  (25%)
Different opinion
LQ , Envy , Ms. Spice , TexasBrat
4  (17%)
Total votes: 24
Poll is closed
11/16/2011
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Contributor: SiNn SiNn
Quote:
Originally posted by Iggins09
I know this seems like a weird poll question but the object of my poll question is aimed at asking women who have not orgasmed during sex with any partner if they think that the way they feel about a man or how involved they are during the sexual act ... more
all my exs sucke din that department so i wa sbetter off doing it my self now my fiancee well hes awesome so yes itotallya gree with that statement
11/16/2011
Contributor: RonLee RonLee
Shouldn't it be a collaborative effort? For both partners as well?
11/16/2011
Contributor: Art & Sensation Art & Sensation
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
Shouldn't it be a collaborative effort? For both partners as well?
I agree with this. It takes work from both sides. Sex is something that you do together and share, not something that is done for the other; but with them.
11/16/2011
Contributor: Art & Sensation Art & Sensation
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
Shouldn't it be a collaborative effort? For both partners as well?
I agree with this. It takes work from both sides. Sex is something that you do together and share, not something that is done for the other; but with them.
11/16/2011
Contributor: Envy Envy
A man or woman does not 'make' the orgasm for the other. Not all women can orgasm from PIV sex, and usually if a woman lacks an orgasm, it could be because she's not getting the right stimulation, and that can either fall on her not knowing her body well enough or the guy not being open enough to exploring her or her saying what she likes so that he can help her climax.

I think in the end it really comes down to communication and trust and learning with each other, not that it falls completely on the guy. Because if you think that, then essentially it's like saying, well she didn't orgasm so her guy must not be very good in bed because he failed to make her climax, which is a BS way of looking at it.
11/16/2011
Contributor: LQ LQ
I kind of wanted to pick "yes" and "other" both. Yes, certainly your partner has something to do with it. But, when I read the topic I read it sort of wrong and thought "Bah! Like I'm going to wait around for him to get it right, when he is obviously clueless?" Hehe.

Anyway... I used to rarely orgasm with a partner. Rarely from oral sex, but never from penetrative sex. A lot of the things holding me back were mental... I'm a control freak & the vulnerability was not comfortable for me. Basically I needed to give myself "permission" to orgasm. *insert long story involving online relationship* With the online situation, I was able to go at my own pace without worrying someone was staring at me, or I was doing something wrong. When I did orgasm, nothing terrible happened, so I became more comfortable with it. And since then I've been able to come quite easily. If the guy I'm with isn't doing it for me, I can still generally make it happen for myself. Of course, I try to avoid those situations - I'd certainly rather have more of a give and take with both people.
11/16/2011
Contributor: Iggins09 Iggins09
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
Shouldn't it be a collaborative effort? For both partners as well?
RonLee, I agree with your statement. It should be a collaborative effort, but sometimes I think a woman's orgasm during sex is affected by how much the guy drives her crazy and how much she loves him being inside her that the sex just blows their mind.
11/16/2011
Contributor: Iggins09 Iggins09
Quote:
Originally posted by Envy
A man or woman does not 'make' the orgasm for the other. Not all women can orgasm from PIV sex, and usually if a woman lacks an orgasm, it could be because she's not getting the right stimulation, and that can either fall on her not ... more
Because if you think that, then essentially it's like saying, well she didn't orgasm so her guy must not be very good in bed because he failed to make her climax, which is a BS way of looking at it. I definitely don't think it's solely up to the guy.

Goth, I totally agree! You're right! With my situation, I've never been able to orgasm during sex and I get fully into it and it feels really good and I get that tingle like I get before I orgasm from oral stimulation but nothing happens no matter what position. My husband will give me oral sex but he very rarely takes the time out to explore my body like I've told him I like.
11/16/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
here's the thing... orgasms are both the product of a mental state and a physical state. A lot of women don't orgasm not because they have crappy partners, but because women don't know how to reach that orgasm, i.e. they may have a prior experience that makes it difficult or impossible to orgasm, or they may suffer from a physical disorder, ect.

I've orgasmed with almost all my partners, and it's not because they were all sex gods. I don't put the pressure on the male to make me orgasm; i learned enough about my body and mind so that I can reach that state.

i think women need to stop placing all of the burden on their partners to "make them orgasm." it's our bodies, not theirs. we know what works and what doesn't. women need to step it up and figure out what they need to do so that they can have that "o" moment, be it dealing with stuff from the past, using toys to assist, or being more sexually honest with yourself. and then communicate that with your partner so he/ she can help reach that state as well
11/16/2011
Contributor: averageguyextrodinarypleasure averageguyextrodinarypleasure
I think it's a combination of both people I really think that the woman has to let herself have an orgasm but the man can definately aid in relaxing her and bringing her to the point where she does. Orgasms seem more like a mental thing than a physical, you really have to relax in your mind and allow it to happen
11/17/2011
Contributor: M121212 M121212
I don't think that the man makes the orgasm at all for a woman. I'm of the Betty Dodson school of thought that says ladies gotta learn it for themselves first. Then if they choose to take that experience out and share it with a man or a woman or any other kind of combination, that's nice and can be really fun!

I'm also a believer in setting space and time for activities to happen (sex, for example). And sometimes I find it tricky to be that intentional when I'm by myself. Sometimes partner sex is good because it provides focus for people to get down to it!
11/18/2011
Contributor: M121212 M121212
Quote:
Originally posted by Envy
A man or woman does not 'make' the orgasm for the other. Not all women can orgasm from PIV sex, and usually if a woman lacks an orgasm, it could be because she's not getting the right stimulation, and that can either fall on her not ... more
I agree.
11/18/2011
Contributor: OrangeKushBB OrangeKushBB
For the most part..
11/19/2011
Contributor: Miss Anonymous Miss Anonymous
Yes, definitely
11/19/2011
Contributor: Apirka Apirka
I definitely have to be into the guy and find him attractive otherwise I will not orgasm. The actual act of sex might feel alright, but if I'm not into him or it, it's no going to happen.
03/21/2012
Contributor: deltalima deltalima
Quote:
Originally posted by Iggins09
I know this seems like a weird poll question but the object of my poll question is aimed at asking women who have not orgasmed during sex with any partner if they think that the way they feel about a man or how involved they are during the sexual act ... more
Penetration definitely gives a better orgasm, for me at least.
03/22/2012
Contributor: BlooJay BlooJay
My girlfriend says her orgasms are better with penetration.
03/22/2012
Contributor: ViVix ViVix
Quote:
Originally posted by Iggins09
I know this seems like a weird poll question but the object of my poll question is aimed at asking women who have not orgasmed during sex with any partner if they think that the way they feel about a man or how involved they are during the sexual act ... more
I usually get myself off during sex. There have been times where I don't need to do anything, but usually, I'm on top and just use my hand on my clit. This takes the pressure off of him too because the poor guy will try to hang on until I get off every time.
03/23/2012