How do you let your lover know if there is some activity you specifically want?
Getting what you want..?
06/08/2011
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Sometimes, I don't just speak, I yell!
06/08/2011
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We do a combination of all 3 of the bottom ones. We originally both tended to do the top (nothing) but that didn't work for either of us. It can be tough to admit what you want, but we are both getting better at it.
Originally posted by
Bignuf
How do you let your lover know if there is some activity you specifically want?
06/08/2011
I find it better to be direct, not as in "you aren't doing it right!", but "ohh, I'd love it if you did this!". Once you are comfortable enough knowing what works for you, it gets easier speaking up.
06/08/2011
Sometimes body language is enough, but I'm definitely not afraid to speak up about what I want.
06/08/2011
body language usually works
06/08/2011
I use to try more subtle clues - but she wasn't getting it, so I'm more direct now.
06/08/2011
I either tell the person point blank, such as, "Get on your knees and suck me," or I go with the flow of how things are moving. When it comes to performance, I usually give the person a bit of time to adjust to me, but if they still do not know what they're doing, I'll tell them exactly how I need whatever they're doing. Such as, "You're doing this good, but try doing this and it will feel much better."
06/08/2011
I usually just direct the person non verbally. I don't want to demand anything, but if it's not quite right i'll guide them a little or make a slight adjustment.
06/08/2011
I tell him outright and he does the same. Yay for communication
06/08/2011
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Same here, Sam!
Originally posted by
Jul!a
I tell him outright and he does the same. Yay for communication
06/08/2011
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Same for me and my husband.
Originally posted by
Jul!a
I tell him outright and he does the same. Yay for communication
06/08/2011
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I have tried the go with the flow but it never seems to work and I get frustrated and then my guys tell me that I should just ask....and call me moron or somesuch....
Originally posted by
Bignuf
How do you let your lover know if there is some activity you specifically want?
06/08/2011
Sometimes I just gesture to let him know what I want.
06/08/2011
My guy is usually explicit about what he wants, but I definitely go with the flow. Focusing on what he likes to do is a big part of what keeps me turned on.
06/08/2011
We talk in a sex neutral time and space. I don't want to whip out some crazy fantasy in the middle of getting it on if I don't think he'd be ok with it without a discussion.
06/08/2011
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I think that's the best way to go about it.
Originally posted by
Jul!a
I tell him outright and he does the same. Yay for communication
06/08/2011
Communication is very good, when it's mutual and constant!
06/08/2011
Communication is key and sometimes actions speak louder than words
06/08/2011
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I have to speak and give very explicit directions. He doesn't get nonverbal cues even slightly.
Originally posted by
Bignuf
How do you let your lover know if there is some activity you specifically want?
06/10/2011
show them
06/10/2011
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I know, right? lol We communicate too... it's magical!
Originally posted by
Jul!a
I tell him outright and he does the same. Yay for communication
We talk about it when we're not having sex too. I'll tell him something specific that I like, and he tells me he can't wait to do it to me. Then, when we're in the moment, I'll sometimes ask him: do you want me to ____ or ____ and then he'll tell me which option he'd prefer, or give me another idea I hadn't thought of. Sex between 2 people is meant to be that way, I think. And it sure keeps us both happy!
06/10/2011
We are all about verbal communication. It's a turn on for us!
06/10/2011
its easier when it verbal
06/10/2011
i just tell him what i want.
06/16/2011
Ask and you may recieve?
06/16/2011
It's all about communication.
06/18/2011
I talk sometimes. Sometimes I just go with the flow.
06/18/2011
I don't mind telling them what to do
06/19/2011
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ill just wait till shes clearly ready for anything sexual and then slowly sneak in what activity i want lol
Originally posted by
Bignuf
How do you let your lover know if there is some activity you specifically want?
10/19/2011
Total posts: 32
Unique posters: 31
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