Guys, how much do you REALLY notice?

Contributor: ShySubmissive ShySubmissive
I have been with my boyfriend a long time, I'm talking almost 8 years, and I know this is going to sound weird, but he's never seen me naked. Hes seen bits of me when the lights are dim, but never in the light. I have self esteem issues, I've never been "skinny" but i'm not really big either, i'm what you would call chubby I guess. I love to look at the cute little camisoles and lingerie, but even when I do buy something, I cant muster it up to wear it in front of him because I worry he'll just see parts of me that I view as "flawed".

I am going to therapy already, but I dont think that will really help me in this aspect of my life. Guys,when your girl is naked or close to it in front of you, how much do you really scrutinize their body, or are you just happy to be gettin some? lol let me know what you focus on from a males perspective I just want to know.
01/11/2010
  • Upgrade Your Hands-Free Play!
  • Long-distance pleasure set for couples
  • Save Extra 20% On Love Cushion And Toy Set!
  • Anal Sub Hook&Rope Kit for $28.99 Only
  • Complete strap-on set for extra 15% off
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Quote:
Originally posted by ShySubmissive
I have been with my boyfriend a long time, I'm talking almost 8 years, and I know this is going to sound weird, but he's never seen me naked. Hes seen bits of me when the lights are dim, but never in the light. I have self esteem issues, ... more
If he loves you, he loves you.

Trust me on this: after 8 years, i'm sure he knows what you look like naked and he's still with you...I'm guessing he loves you regardless of how you see yourself.
01/11/2010
Contributor: Juliettia Juliettia
I used to have the same problem with my Husband. I hated sex with the lights on because I was afraid of what he'd think about me. The truth is, we see far more flaws in ourselves than our significant others see.

I've asked my Husband a thousand times about what he thinks of me in the light. He says he has never had a problem with my body. I'm sexy. If he didn't he wouldn't fuck me, much less be with me.

Over time I've grown mostly comfortable with myself and having him see me without turning all the lights off in the city. It's something you just have to keep doing until it clicks that hey, they think you're fucking awesome.
01/11/2010
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Quote:
Originally posted by Juliettia
I used to have the same problem with my Husband. I hated sex with the lights on because I was afraid of what he'd think about me. The truth is, we see far more flaws in ourselves than our significant others see.

I've asked my Husband ... more
yup.
I'm Mr. Sauce and I endorse this message.
01/11/2010
Contributor: Dragon Dragon
One of the most incredibly sexy people I know is overweight. I completely love his body.
01/11/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
I completely scrutinize her body. I look at every part of her, notice every part of her, and even take note of the imperfections.

But I do not care. She is still my beautiful girl.

And if your partner loves you for who you are, neither will he.
01/11/2010
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
Quote:
Originally posted by Juliettia
I used to have the same problem with my Husband. I hated sex with the lights on because I was afraid of what he'd think about me. The truth is, we see far more flaws in ourselves than our significant others see.

I've asked my Husband ... more
I agree. My husband has made me more comfortable with my body since he loves every part of me, and I'm comfortable with his as well.
01/11/2010
Contributor: Kayla Kayla
I'm 280 pounds, and I can walk around in broad daylight and my boyfriend still call me sexy. Considering I think I was like 210 when we started dating - believe me, he's going to love you regardless of whatever problem bits you think you have. He loves you for you. Most guys don't scrutinize anyways. They're going to look for the gentle scope of your collar bone (sensual area), the way your hips seem so perfect, how your skin feels so soft. They aren't looking for flaws.
01/11/2010
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
If he doesn't like it, he'll let you know - most all will be tactless enough at some point or another and tell you if they do feel that way. After eight years, even with all your incognito attempts, he would have seen you.

Now, what YOU need to do is give yourself a nice bath, scrub and fix up your skin, wear nothing but a pair of panties and a camisole, and walk around like that. All day (if you have the house to yourself for the day). Get used to seeing yourself, drag the mirrors out. Keep doing it while he's home, too. I've recently discovered that the confidence a woman shows in her body is a hundred-fold sexier than any piece of lingerie she uses to put it in the best light.

Am I right, boys?
01/11/2010
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
If he doesn't like it, he'll let you know - most all will be tactless enough at some point or another and tell you if they do feel that way. After eight years, even with all your incognito attempts, he would have seen you.

Now, what ... more
+2 bonus points to Chilipepper Girl
01/11/2010
Contributor: Miss Cinnamon Miss Cinnamon
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
If he doesn't like it, he'll let you know - most all will be tactless enough at some point or another and tell you if they do feel that way. After eight years, even with all your incognito attempts, he would have seen you.

Now, what ... more
I'm not a boy, but Chilipepper's right!
01/12/2010
Contributor: Jill Ingoff Jill Ingoff
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
If he doesn't like it, he'll let you know - most all will be tactless enough at some point or another and tell you if they do feel that way. After eight years, even with all your incognito attempts, he would have seen you.

Now, what ... more
great answer! I wholeheartedly agree with chilipepper girl.
01/12/2010
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
Oh, and just so you know I'm not blowing out my ears - I'm a size 20 gal with body issues you wouldn't believe on top of being extremely shy. It just took biting the bullet and going ahead that I discovered it's not as bad as we make it out to be. I don't have inborn confidence - every act I do is a battle I'm earned my victories in, and simply admitting that my body is here and 'you better worship it, baby' has gotten nothing but enthusiasm from my lover. That's all it takes - and it's a huge step, but absolutely worth it. You can do it, too, ShySubmissive.
01/12/2010
Contributor: deceased deceased
My ex one day asked me why we always fuck with the loghts on, was I afraid of the dark or something? Apparently she liked it pitch dark and had NEVER had the lights on. "I'm not afraid of the dark, I am afraid of herpes, crabs, genital warts, discharges and other abberations. I gotta see what I am getting into.

She also never let me have a hockey game going on the tv in the background.(Its way more exciting than porn)

We were ill suited.
01/12/2010