Is Porn Healthy Or Harmful to a Relationship?

Contributor: PonyPlay PonyPlay
I have heard of many people that watch porn with their partner, I guess I was just wondering if you think it's healthy to the relationship or not? What I'm saying is do you think it can have any positive or negative side effects?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
I think it is healthy for a relationship to watch it together
16  (11%)
I think it is harmful to a relationship to watch it together
2  (1%)
I think it depends on the people in the relationship and the situation
117  (80%)
I don't think it has an effect good or bad in a relationship
3  (2%)
I only think it's harmful when someone does it behind my back
3  (2%)
I think it doesn't matter if it's behind my back I think it's healthy
It's complicated let me explain
5  (3%)
Total votes: 146
Poll is closed
07/19/2010
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Contributor: Avant-garde Avant-garde
I think that it depends on the situation really. Porn can be addictive like other things and when abused can become a problem. Alcohol is fine in moderation, but in excess can be a real problem. I think porn is the same way as long as it is indulgence, not compulsion. I do think thought that it should not be done behind a partners back, communication and honesty is the key.
07/19/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
It depends on the relationship, really.

For me, it would not be harmful for us to watch it with each other. It would, however, be harmful if we watched it behind each other's backs. I do not go for that.
07/19/2010
Contributor: Blinker Blinker
When your partner or you start to turn to porn for sexual release and satisfaction instead of having actual sex, it's a problem.

I'm not a big fan of porn but I'm fine with my boyfriend watching it while we're not together. I know he needs visual stimuli to get himself off. But when we're together, he doesn't watch it by himself. If we feel like it we watch porn together but it's a rare occassion. I'm just not too into it.
07/19/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Blinker
When your partner or you start to turn to porn for sexual release and satisfaction instead of having actual sex, it's a problem.

I'm not a big fan of porn but I'm fine with my boyfriend watching it while we're not together. I ... more
You've summed up pretty much exactly how I feel on this too.
07/19/2010
Contributor: PassionQT PassionQT
To a certain degree, porn is unrealistic, especially when they are acting. I'm not a big fan either and have to be in a certain mood to watch it. But when I do, I wonder: "Are they really having fun? Are they in the mood? Do the men take Viagra to keep it up?" etc.. I'll watch soft porn anytime, again, something like "Wild Orchid", one of my all time favorite, erotic movies. They may be acting, but it just seems toned down. I sure never have porn star fucking sessions with my man, we have fun, but he doesn't pound the *bleep* out of my pussy or ass just because he sees that in porn movies.
07/19/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
As long as it isn't a point of contention or an excuse to avoid intimacy then watching porn together is fine in any relationship. It can be a special naughty hobby a couple shares which increases intimacy in which case it would be a very good thing! It can also be something one does by oneself and if it doesn't cause hurt feelings with your partner(s) then that's fine too.
It really does depend on the relationship and the people involved.
07/19/2010
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
It depends on the relationship simply because some people feel that porn is cheating in some way, or some kind of betrayal. Personally, I can't get behind that, I personally couldn't care less what my partner watches in his free time. Sometimes we watch porn together, too. But for other people I know this could be a real violation of trust and boundaries, so it really does depend on the people, imho.
07/19/2010
Contributor: Gary Gary
What is healthy or harmful is different for everyone.
07/19/2010
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
I think it's been healthy for us - it's opened both of us up to being more willing to try things and express more of our fantasies.
07/19/2010
Contributor: Illusional Illusional
I'd like to watch it with my partner, but he won't. I don't know why...
07/19/2010
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
I had a whole thing written out here...but decided to delete it.

I find most of it negative to individuals and couples, but not me or my partner as a couple. It depends on the person and content etc.
07/20/2010
Contributor: kinky girlfriend kinky girlfriend
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I had a whole thing written out here...but decided to delete it.

I find most of it negative to individuals and couples, but not me or my partner as a couple. It depends on the person and content etc.
I like porn and its ok to watch it even if its not with each other I mean people get busy and sometimes don't see each other..It depends on the people and other things though. I'd watch porn alone with a vibrator,say I want sex but I only see my boyfriend 1-2 times a week. Sometiems when I'm at work I think in my head sometimes "wow that person needs to get a vibrator and porn" Sometimes I wonder if that would help their bitchyness or help calm them down.
07/20/2010
Contributor: PonyPlay PonyPlay
Quote:
Originally posted by kinky girlfriend
I like porn and its ok to watch it even if its not with each other I mean people get busy and sometimes don't see each other..It depends on the people and other things though. I'd watch porn alone with a vibrator,say I want sex but I only see ... more
Do you tell your boyfriend you do it alone though or do you think it's ok to do it behind his back, or visa versa
07/20/2010
Contributor: Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
What is healthy or harmful is different for everyone.
I have to agree with this. It's never been harmful in our relationship, but I've heard of some who have had problems with it.
07/20/2010
Contributor: kinky girlfriend kinky girlfriend
Quote:
Originally posted by PonyPlay
Do you tell your boyfriend you do it alone though or do you think it's ok to do it behind his back, or visa versa
I know he watches porn and he knows I have some porn too. It's not behind each other's backs. We don't care that we watch porn alone or together..I have some vibrators and he is cool with that,in fact he thinks its hot to watch a girls use them. It's not like we have an adiction or that have ever lied about it. we both just watch it sometimes and sometimes together. we don't live together and he lives over an hour away from me. I think its ok and natural to want to watch porn.. It can depend on the content,say all he wanted to watch was foot fetish or something just hardcore and freaky alll the time. We're just into regular porn the only difference is that he likes lesbian porn which lots of guys do I'm ok with that. Last week I watched porn once or twice and I even told him and that I saw something I thought was hot and I wanted to do.
07/20/2010
Contributor: softkkisses softkkisses
I do not like porn but my husband does and I do not care if he watches it...
09/22/2010
Contributor: mllebeauty mllebeauty
My man and I both like porn and share it with each other. It works well for us. However, I dated someone briefly in the past who was so obsessed he became unrealistic about sex and focused more on the porn than me. So it really depends on the the individuals and the couple, as many people have already pointed out.
09/22/2010
Contributor: Viktor Vysheslav Malkin Viktor Vysheslav Malkin
I don't see it as unhealthy.

It depends on the people in my opinion.
09/22/2010
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
I personally stay away
09/24/2010
Contributor: clp clp
It definitely depends on the folks involved. I myself am a big fan, but have had different experiences when presented this situation with partners. With one, I felt that my partner was seeking out a fantasy that he was unwilling to share with me (the style and subject of porn was different than what we practiced and the way he handled how he felt about it made me uncomfortable). On the other hand, my current partner and I love and share porn tastes, and have all kinds of fun and games based on and incorporating it. This is probably more of a testament to our individual chemistry, and not about the porn at all.

Its a tricky one to handle, porn is.
09/24/2010
Contributor: pinkzombie pinkzombie
Quote:
Originally posted by PonyPlay
I have heard of many people that watch porn with their partner, I guess I was just wondering if you think it's healthy to the relationship or not? What I'm saying is do you think it can have any positive or negative side effects?
It surely depends on the people and the relationship. Porn is a healthy fun part of my marriage, but I had an X who was addicted and that was all he did...
11/20/2010
Contributor: Midway through Midway through
Me and my best friend watched a porno together, I think it was a great bonding experience, the porno sucked and we laughed.

On a serious note, I think it's good and healthy to watch porn, it's not going to kill anyone.
11/20/2010
Contributor: Hallmar82 Hallmar82
Everything in moderation I think. Too much of a good thing can desensitize you to something that gets you excited now. When it reaches that point, it could approach an addition. I've never suggested incorporating it into our sex life because of issues related to unreasonable expectations and hurt pride. As a substitute, we regularly use dirty talk and reading erotic stories/letters - it usually serves the same purpose without many (but not all) of the negatives.
11/20/2010
Contributor: celibacysucks celibacysucks
Quote:
Originally posted by PonyPlay
I have heard of many people that watch porn with their partner, I guess I was just wondering if you think it's healthy to the relationship or not? What I'm saying is do you think it can have any positive or negative side effects?
Porn should be something the couple agrees on. Speaking from firsthand experience, disagreements can be very detrimental to a relationship.
11/20/2010
Contributor: Robin Goodfellow Robin Goodfellow
Porn is fascinating. It must be in our biology to think so. However, the biologys leverage on the mind can be a touchy one. In short, I think porn is more addictive than cigarettes. So.. these days I mainly stay away. Unless I'm partyin.
11/20/2010
Contributor: PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
Neither of us watch it. It's not for us and our relationship together. I think it's fine if it works for other people, but my huband and I are all set with just each other!
12/13/2010
Contributor: mrs.mckrakn mrs.mckrakn
depends. i watch it with hubbie not often thou
12/13/2010
Contributor: sbon sbon
It depends on the people and the situation. I think there are times when it can be very healthy (together or separate), but it also has the potential to be unhealthy (ex: if one person is purposely hiding it from or lying about it to the other).
12/14/2010
Contributor: RemusHalifax RemusHalifax
Sometimes me and my boyfriend watch porn to get in the mood or get ideas. We only watch lesbian porn though, because we can both agree that it's sexy. I don't really watch it by myself unless I'm super bored, although I never masturbate to it. I don't know how much he watches by himself, but I don't think he really does at all. It hasn't really effected our relationship one way or another, although he is turned on by the fact that I think lesbian porn is sexy, so that's a plus, I guess.
12/19/2010