The New Intimacy

Experimenting While In A Relationship.

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Contributor: AshMegYo AshMegYo
My boyfriend recently left for basic training. While he is gone, one of our mutual friends who is also in the ARMY and a lesbian is coming to stay with me one weekend next month.
We have talked about messing around while she is here. What are your views?
Do you consider it cheating? (Please note that my boyfriend is aware of everything and doesn't care.)
10/07/2011
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Contributor: Ghost Ghost
If your boyfriend knows, and has given consent, it's not cheating. By definition, cheating is engaging in sexual behavior behind your partners back, without consent.
10/07/2011
Contributor: Ryuson Ryuson
(Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by Ghost
If your boyfriend knows, and has given consent, it's not cheating. By definition, cheating is engaging in sexual behavior behind your partners back, without consent.
This.
10/07/2011
Contributor: unfulfilled unfulfilled
Are you sure your bf doesn't care? If that's true then it's not cheating.
10/07/2011
Contributor: Breas Breas
If your boyfriend really doesn't care, then no it is not cheating.
10/07/2011
Contributor: nori nori
In agreement with everyone's answers, it's only cheating if your significant other doesn't know/hasn't given permission.

but if it were me? I would feel guilty. But that's just me.
10/07/2011
Contributor: Peggi Peggi
Quote:
Originally posted by AshMegYo
My boyfriend recently left for basic training. While he is gone, one of our mutual friends who is also in the ARMY and a lesbian is coming to stay with me one weekend next month.
We have talked about messing around while she is here. What are ... more
As long as he knows and has no concerns, and you're open about it and discuss it with him as much as he wants you to (as in if he asks questions about it, how many times etc) then it isn't cheating. As long as she also realizes all aspects of it as well, I don't see a problem with it. No one is getting hurt, and it's all in good fun. So, no harm
10/07/2011
Contributor: Sex'и'Violence Sex'и'Violence
If your boyfriend is honestly ok with it than no it's not cheating. Go for it.
10/07/2011
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
You might want to opely ask him once again...just to be sure that he's ok with it. Sometimes a partner is perfectly fine when it's a fantasy that MIGHT come true but when it is suddenly ground zero, that's when the claws and fangs come out.
If he's ok with it then have a great time!
10/07/2011
Contributor: CutiePatootie CutiePatootie
If he doesn't consider it cheating I think it's fine as long as you also don't think of yourself as cheating either. Also, I'd make sure you have solid lines. What are you allowed to do while you're apart and what is he alowed to do? Make sure things are very clear before you cause more drama than needed. But have fun if no feelings are being hurt!
10/19/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
You might want to opely ask him once again...just to be sure that he's ok with it. Sometimes a partner is perfectly fine when it's a fantasy that MIGHT come true but when it is suddenly ground zero, that's when the claws and fangs come ... more
Seconded! Great advice Airen!
10/19/2011
Contributor: Eliza Eliza
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
You might want to opely ask him once again...just to be sure that he's ok with it. Sometimes a partner is perfectly fine when it's a fantasy that MIGHT come true but when it is suddenly ground zero, that's when the claws and fangs come ... more
I agree with this.

If it's a go, have a blast! Sex with women is awesome.
10/19/2011
Contributor: Breas Breas
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
You might want to opely ask him once again...just to be sure that he's ok with it. Sometimes a partner is perfectly fine when it's a fantasy that MIGHT come true but when it is suddenly ground zero, that's when the claws and fangs come ... more
Excellent advice
10/20/2011
Contributor: TheSlyFox TheSlyFox
It's not cheating if your boyfriend is okay with it and knows about it! (:
10/22/2011
Contributor: PassionCpl PassionCpl
Quote:
Originally posted by AshMegYo
My boyfriend recently left for basic training. While he is gone, one of our mutual friends who is also in the ARMY and a lesbian is coming to stay with me one weekend next month.
We have talked about messing around while she is here. What are ... more
If you do it without his permission and behind his back then yes, it's absolutely cheating. If he knows she's coming over and that you might play and he's fine with it then that's obviously permission.
10/23/2011
Contributor: CadmiumKitty CadmiumKitty
go for it
04/24/2012
Contributor: TheParrishism TheParrishism
Ask a few more times before you do it. I allowed this once in my relationship and it turned out that neither of us were ok with it and we both regret what happened. He only asked once and did not confirm it before it happened. we were able to work through it, but it was very difficult.
04/28/2012