What did you come out as? How do you identify now?

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What did you come out as? How do you identify now?

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Contributor: carenautilus carenautilus
There are lots of labels for sexual orientations. It often feels to me that none of them fit all the way. I came out as bi, but eventually decided that pansexuality was the best identity for me. What about you? What did you come out as? What label do you use now, and how do you feel about it?

Oh, and in case you're interested about pansexuality, wikipedia gets it more or less right:

Pansexuality
09/20/2011
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Contributor: Peggi Peggi
Quote:
Originally posted by carenautilus
There are lots of labels for sexual orientations. It often feels to me that none of them fit all the way. I came out as bi, but eventually decided that pansexuality was the best identity for me. What about you? What did you come out as? What label do ... more
I tell people I am bisexual because I hate explaining what it means to be pansexual, but I define myself to myself and those who do understand, as pansexual.
09/20/2011
Contributor: Pixel Pixel
I first ID'd as bisexual, but now consider myself pansexual or sapiosexual.
09/20/2011
Contributor: Rawhide Rawhide
When I came out, the word I used was gay. That was basically it for my LGBT vocabulary- gay, lesbian, homo. Those were the words I heard at church and school

But later I found a ton of other words for what I am. Culturally, I identify as a dyke. But my sexual orientation is queer, because when it comes down to it that is the one thing all my sexual partners have in common. 99% of the time I am with queer women, and they are the people I love and partner with, but I do have certain limited interactions with queer guys as well.
09/20/2011
Contributor: carenautilus carenautilus
Quote:
Originally posted by Peggi
I tell people I am bisexual because I hate explaining what it means to be pansexual, but I define myself to myself and those who do understand, as pansexual.
That's pretty much where I am too.
09/21/2011
Contributor: carenautilus carenautilus
Quote:
Originally posted by Rawhide
When I came out, the word I used was gay. That was basically it for my LGBT vocabulary- gay, lesbian, homo. Those were the words I heard at church and school

But later I found a ton of other words for what I am. Culturally, I identify as a ... more
I use queer some of the time for the same reasons. I agree that queer and dyke speak to a cultural identity that's just as important as who I fuck.

Thanks for your response, it was really thoughtful and interesting.
09/21/2011
Contributor: mudpie mudpie
I came out as bisexual, and I still ID that way, but I usually use the word "queer" to describe myself.
11/09/2011
Contributor: LilMissSub LilMissSub
I'm Pansexual. Originally I came out as a Lesbian to my family, my father was okay with it, my mother had a heart attack, my younger sisters were like 'meh' and my older sister referenced the family guy episode where Meg says she's a lesbian and her mother tells her she's not.

I -am- more attracted to women physically, but I've run across scenarios in my life(Two men and two FtM) who made me realize I could love anyone. I'm engaged to a man right now who I've been with for years.

I have a fairly strict priority of personality attraction then sexual attraction blooms off of that, excluding women who physically appeal to me from the start but need a good personality.

Conversational skills also are a huge thing to me. I usually explain my Pansexuality to others as "If a goat had great conversational skills and a great personality, I'd be attracted to a goat". It's a funny way of putting it, but it gets my point across.
11/10/2011
Contributor: Jake'n'bake Jake'n'bake
I originally came out to my mom as bisexual - which got shot down. She told me I didn't know what I was talking about and that it was just a phase, which was hella offensive. I'm fairly sure she doesn't know I mean in a sexual way instead of a purely mind attracted to mind way. It's both, for me.

I don't think I'll bother coming out to my dad. Not because I don't think he'll take it well, but because I don't really feel the need for some reason.
12/14/2011
Contributor: solita solita
I originally came out as a lesbian, and now identify as queer. My sexual orientation hasn't changed-- merely the way I look at it. I'm attracted to a particular type of femininity, and when I was younger, I saw the fact that I was attracted to some guys as just the exception that proved the rule: all the guys I was attracted to looked like girls. I prefer queer over bisexual or pansexual because it feels less like I'm invalidating an identity I held for years.
12/15/2011
Contributor: aroarofthunder aroarofthunder
When I was younger, I identified as bisexual. When I was older, as lesbian. Now that I'm a fair amount older (comparatively - only 28), I identify as homoflexible, though am considering identifying as queer. I am with a man, but prefer women, and act on that preference any chance I get (not because I am dissatisfied with the man I am with, but rather because I need both and generally only find women attractive).
01/19/2012
Contributor: klyte klyte
I came out as a lesbian, but now I identify as gender fluid. Some days I just don't feel feminine and feel more masculine and decide to use the men's room. Most people can't really tell the difference, but I can feel the difference. I first identified as a gay female and then began to feel that when I felt masculine and more male that I was straight and functioned as a straight male with my girlfriend. I still haven't actively told everyone that I feel masculine and more male most of the time because I'm a bit weary of how they'd react, but my girlfriend is just as fluid with my fluidity as I am and accepts it openly, though when I met her, I hadn't told her yet.
01/19/2012