The New Intimacy

Foreplay

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Contributor: zz1aag zz1aag
I am trying to start doing foreplay in my relationship because its not going to well. What do yall suggest I start of with? Other inputs suggestions grately appreciated..I dont know much about this, which is why I need your input! hehe. thanks!!!
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Peggi , Ninja Bunny , Ansley , CherryDyke , MR Chickhabit , married with children , ily , dawnkye , Rossie , A Closet Slut (aka nipplepeople) , monkeylover621 , Jenyana , lzbncrckhead , JRabbits , ellejay , PassionCpl , RavenWolf88 , Jake'n'bake , Faith , <3BF , Rainbow Boy , sexydelphia , Girly Girl , reknit , LoveDove , eroticmutt , Lover of Leather , dks210 , Nerdydyke , jbknows , Teacookie , Nazaress , megan1987 , StarFire , Femme Mystique , dhig , sunkissedJess , Catch Star , Missmarc , 19WolfMan51 , Mamastoys , pootpootpoot , WD40watcher , duff , ginainohio , Onlyoneuneed , AliMc , Passion plum , Lori Gonzales , katat , KittiezToyz , treehugger , sXeVegan90 , gehuwd , Hummingbird , mpfm
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Peggi , Ninja Bunny , Ansley , CherryDyke , pinkcupcakes , MR Chickhabit , married with children , Ryuson , ily , Rossie , A Closet Slut (aka nipplepeople) , monkeylover621 , Ghost , Jenyana , ellejay , RavenWolf88 , Jake'n'bake , Faith , Rainbow Boy , sexydelphia , Tangerine , eroticmutt , LAndJ , vampyroteuthidae , Lover of Leather , dks210 , Teacookie , Stinkytofu10 , Undead , Nazaress , rlodge , megan1987 , Femme Mystique , sunkissedJess , SubmissiveFeminist , Catch Star , Missmarc , vitriolicvertigo , Mamastoys , pootpootpoot , Chief , friendswithfangs , WD40watcher , geekkink , Llahsram , AliMc , bdan , fernwehh , wet mama , katat , KittiezToyz , redwolf , treehugger , marshmallow , kandy anjel , sXeVegan90 , mpfm
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Peggi , Ninja Bunny , Ansley , married with children , mizzmilla , ily , Rossie , Breas , monkeylover621 , Jenyana , JRabbits , ellejay , RavenWolf88 , Jake'n'bake , Faith , sexydelphia , Graniteal , Jon S , Hallmar82 , eroticmutt , LAndJ , Oomph2687 , dks210 , jbknows , Teacookie , Undead , xGOLDx , butts , Nazaress , Femme Mystique , TheParrishism , sunkissedJess , Catch Star , Missmarc , Mamastoys , pootpootpoot , WD40watcher , AliMc , skeeterlynn , adam71 , katat , LoganAshlee. , KittiezToyz , KrissyNovacaine , rc4elmo3 , sXeVegan90 , JinxPinx , mpfm
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Total votes: 161 (92 voters)
Poll is open
08/30/2011
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Contributor: Peggi Peggi
I think all 3 are great ideas, it all depends on what you and your partner are into, or willing to experiment with maybe even discuss secret fantasies and use those as a tool to figure out what will work best
08/30/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I agree, all three might be a good idea. However, all of it will fail if you don't communicate with whomever you're interested in at the moment.
08/30/2011
Contributor: CherryDyke CherryDyke
Others are right about a need for communication.
08/30/2011
Contributor: MR Chickhabit MR Chickhabit
if you dont talk to your partner about what you want, you will NEVER get it.
08/30/2011
Contributor: mizzmilla mizzmilla
I agree about the need for communication. But the three choices are all good.
08/31/2011
Contributor: Ryuson Ryuson
(Review Program Mentor)
Personally, I find the best foreplay to be him fingering me. Taking the time to work up to sex is the important part; female arousal takes time! One minute with a vibrator won't work any better than one minute with his tongue!

If you're looking to introduce toys into the bedroom not to solve a problem but to try something new and pleasurable, I'd start with a small, high quality external vibrator. There are tons of great ones on here!
08/31/2011
Contributor: dawnkye dawnkye
I love toys, but for getting things started, I'd say costumes.
08/31/2011
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
Good communication plus all of the above.
08/31/2011
Contributor: Breas Breas
i vote the kits
08/31/2011
Contributor: Jenyana Jenyana
I voted for all three because they all might be good for you, but I also totally agree with the others in that communication is your best bet.
09/01/2011
Contributor: emiliaa emiliaa
If your relationship itself is not going well, foreplay will do nothing for that but distract you from the real problem. In that case holding off from sex and JUST communication is best.

If it's just the sexual part, everything above and communication, like others said. ^_^
09/02/2011
Contributor: lzbncrckhead lzbncrckhead
talk with your partner, work on your relationship emotionally before trying to change up your sex life. <3 good luck
09/02/2011
Contributor: iLashe iLashe
Quote:
Originally posted by lzbncrckhead
talk with your partner, work on your relationship emotionally before trying to change up your sex life. <3 good luck
agreed.
09/02/2011
Contributor: sweetcaroline sweetcaroline
I ran into the same "problem" a little while ago-
but my problem was that we were losing intimacy?
we tried vibrators and toys and outfits, which made the sex great, but didn't bring us closer, which was dangerous because in the end we both felt like we were using each other for sex.
The miracle fix was this: one night in bed, we were just falling asleep and I pulled him over for a kiss spur of the moment. Just a sweet soft kiss. Which lasted for a long time. then, of course, we had sex, but it was different.
I'm amazed at what simple physical intimacy will do for a couple. He and I are great now, and several new toys are on their way. But intimacy ladies and gentlemen! intimacy.
11/02/2011
Contributor: <3BF <3BF
Quote:
Originally posted by sweetcaroline
I ran into the same "problem" a little while ago-
but my problem was that we were losing intimacy?
we tried vibrators and toys and outfits, which made the sex great, but didn't bring us closer, which was dangerous because in the ... more
I agree. Keeping up intimacy requires active effort and though toys and lingerie can help, it boils down to making physical intimacy a prerogative in the relationship.
12/28/2011
Contributor: sexydelphia sexydelphia
you def need to talk
12/28/2011
Contributor: Girly Girl Girly Girl
just talk it out
12/28/2011
Contributor: Tangerine Tangerine
It may just be me, but I think forplay is different than the choices you listed. Those are good starts to set the mood. An outfit or massage, a new toy waiting to be used. But the foreplay should probably be the part taht gets you hot. Like kissing,touching, teasing, rubbing and such. And try not to just do those things, learn how to do them great. Doing them and doing them great will get you 2 different results
01/04/2012
Contributor: LoveDove LoveDove
I think a new toy or new lingerie would be good, but I would also suggest one of the little games Eden sells - like the love dice, I think. Kiss here, suck here, etc.
01/11/2012
Contributor: eroticmutt eroticmutt
Quote:
Originally posted by zz1aag
I am trying to start doing foreplay in my relationship because its not going to well. What do yall suggest I start of with? Other inputs suggestions grately appreciated..I dont know much about this, which is why I need your input! hehe. thanks!!!
There is no one right answer- whatever inspires you and your partner
01/11/2012
Contributor: LAndJ LAndJ
I think anything new will help and is at least worth trying. Just try not to do the same thing all the time.
01/11/2012
Contributor: Oomph2687 Oomph2687
love the foreplay
01/12/2012
Contributor: Lover of Leather Lover of Leather
Communication is the key, ask questions, be honest, listen intently, and have fun.
01/31/2012
Contributor: dks210 dks210
All three are fine. It depends on what you and your partner are into. Foreplay should also involve a lot of sensual touching and anticipation.
01/31/2012
Contributor: Teacookie Teacookie
If your partner has long hair brush and pet it, then work down to a neck and shoulder massage. If they are in pain massage that area if they say it makes it feel better. I cream when I get massages that make the pain go away, I also cream when my partner scratches itches for me.

Attention, attention, thats what it seems to be all about. Concentrating on what excites them or makes them feel good.
02/20/2012
Contributor: Stinkytofu10 Stinkytofu10
Quote:
Originally posted by emiliaa
If your relationship itself is not going well, foreplay will do nothing for that but distract you from the real problem. In that case holding off from sex and JUST communication is best.

If it's just the sexual part, everything above and ... more
agreed.
02/26/2012
Contributor: Undead Undead
Quote:
Originally posted by zz1aag
I am trying to start doing foreplay in my relationship because its not going to well. What do yall suggest I start of with? Other inputs suggestions grately appreciated..I dont know much about this, which is why I need your input! hehe. thanks!!!
all are good
02/26/2012
Contributor: butts butts
I think a bit of all 3 would help. Though, is it lack of sex drive or a not-so-hot-flame between you two?

If it's a lack of sex drive issue, a hormone cream/pill/supplement will help, a lack of testosterone in both men and women can lead to a very low sex drive!
02/29/2012
Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
All of the above!
02/29/2012