#AprilFools - April Fool's Day Review

Contributor: Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
TITLE: The Big Goose Cock Noose
Pros: Lots of stimulation. Waterproof.
Cons: Can be a nuisance during blow jobs

Summary:
If you like your orgasms grander, this cock ring's sure to get your gander. With strong vibrations and a little goose action for all, how could you go wrong?

Use:
The Big Goose Cock Noose by Wet Willy toys is ideal for couples who want the maximum stimulation from a cock ring. It's high-flying design allows for stimulation of the clitoris and both partner's anuses, while the honking sound effects help lend a unique ambience to the bedroom.

Some men might be a bit intimidated by the height of the ring, but with enough lube anyone should be able to get it on.

Material / Texture:
Made of TPR, the Goose Noose has a very soft texture and doesn't contain any nickel, latex, phthalates, or other stuff that could disagree with your body. It's pretty stretchy and has a bit of an odor which we haven't been able to place yet, but it's really not that bad. It tastes like chicken.

The mini bullet vibe and the goose's bill are both made of smooth body-safe plastic that also contains no bad stuff and has no odor whatsoever. They don't taste like chicken or anything else.

Design / Shape / Size:
The design of this toy is just brilliant. The ring itself stretches to 2-1/2" diameter and it's a full inch tall so it covers more of your cock than most rings do. It's pretty tight too, so if that doesn't maintain your erection, nothing will.
From the front of this ring extends a small replica of a goose’s head, with a vibration unit inside, and the bill is positioned perfectly to pleasure your gal's clit. From the back of the ring there's a graceful curve of TPR that we can only assume is supposed to be tail feathers, which cups your balls and massages your anus when in use. There are also two wiggly little legs with webbed ticklers that will do the same for your gal's backside.

We'll admit it looks a bit strange. As a matter of fact, when you have it on it looks like you're wearing a small pool flotation device on your cock. So for storage and travel, we suggest putting this toy in at least two bags and hiding it where nobody will ever see it. Ever.

Functions / Performance / Controls:
This cock ring runs on three watch batteries, which are already in the toy when you get it. To get to them, give a good tug and the plastic bill will pop right off so you can slide the batteries in the head, and then snap the bill back in place. To turn the toy on, just wring its neck.

The single-speed vibrations are really intense and can be felt in both peckers (yours and the toy's). But the real treat comes when you thrust. Every time that little bill taps your gal's bliss button, you hear a terrific honking sound. If you get the right rhythms going, it can be downright musical.
To turn the toy off, just wring its neck again.

Of course the Big Goose Cock Noose performs great in the bath or the pond, so no worries there.

Care and Maintenance:
To clean your Big Goose, just scrub it with some soap and water or a toy cleaner and wipe it dry. The bullet is waterproof, so you can just leave that in there when you do. Since it's impossible to sterilize it, we wouldn't suggest sharing it with multiple partners unless... well if you can get a condom over this thing more power to you.

As for lubes, you can use silicone or water-based lubes, but you shouldn't use any oils. Especially cooking oils.

Experience:
Alan says:
This cock ring passes with flying colors in my book. It squeezes, it pleases, and I found out that if I bounce up and down when I'm wearing it it will honk. Now if that don't get your gal in the mood, nothing will.

Michele says:
I'm not sure what to say about this toy. It was great during sex, but Alan likes to wear cock rings sometimes when I give him a blowjob, and that's where this toy fails for me. Do you have any idea how hard it is to give a blowjob with a rubber goose staring at you and honking every time your nose hits its bill?
04/01/2010
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Contributor: Miss Cinnamon Miss Cinnamon
Quote:
Originally posted by Alan & Michele
TITLE: The Big Goose Cock Noose
Pros: Lots of stimulation. Waterproof.
Cons: Can be a nuisance during blow jobs

Summary:
If you like your orgasms grander, this cock ring's sure to get your gander. With strong vibrations and a ... more
How long do the batteries last on this one? And is it just me, or does this look EXACTLY like the Momma Goose Cock Boot, only not pink?
04/01/2010
Contributor: Victoria Victoria
How loud is the honking sound? Can this toy be worn under clothing?
04/01/2010
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Does it come in mongoose or Canadian goose?
04/01/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Cinnamon
How long do the batteries last on this one? And is it just me, or does this look EXACTLY like the Momma Goose Cock Boot, only not pink?
Yeah, what's going on here? I was thinking the same thing, Miss Cinnamon.
04/01/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
Does it come in mongoose or Canadian goose?
I'd like the Canadian goose, a little French-inspired, no?
04/01/2010
Contributor: Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
Do you think I could use this around pets? Or would it make my dogs howl?
04/01/2010
Contributor: Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
Cynthia-- Well, they only last about 40 minutes, because you're right... this IS just the like the Momma Goose Cock Boot, except it's the male version.

Victoria-- It's LOUD... loud enough to be heard through the entire house and probably through the front door and out on the porch. For this reason, you may want to post a No Hunting sign on the porch to avoid a bad situation in case a neighbor drops by. Yes, you can stuff it under very loose clothing, but it makes ya look like you're way too happy to see everyone and it honks whenever your britches rub the bill.

Mr. Sauce-- so far all they're offering is the Canadian Goose. A bummer, huh?

Carrie Ann-- Well, our little ankle biters just tucked tail and ran at the first few honks (it's loud), but you may be in trouble if you have a bird dog. You're man's willy would have to be pretty strong to win a tug of war with one of them.
04/01/2010
Contributor: Gary Gary
When I first moved to Philly I heard about this movie (but never saw it) that was shown at some weird indy filmmaker thing called 'Goose Love' (I think... it's been a while). Supposedly a live goose had its head cut off and the neck was used as a dildo. This One immediately made me think of that wonderful story Great Review!
04/01/2010
Contributor: LicentiouslyYours LicentiouslyYours
I wish they made this in a duck version. I have an irrational fear of geese.
04/01/2010
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Quote:
Originally posted by LicentiouslyYours
I wish they made this in a duck version. I have an irrational fear of geese.
Actually, you can ONLY have rational fear of geese...they are that evil
04/01/2010
Contributor: 00 00
Very cute, but this part... "terrific honking sound. If you get the right rhythms going, it can be downright musical." Made my imagination go in such a BAD direction. Thanks.
04/01/2010
Contributor: 00 00
Very cute, but this part... "terrific honking sound. If you get the right rhythms going, it can be downright musical." Made my imagination go in such a BAD direction. Thanks.
04/01/2010
Contributor: SydVicious SydVicious
Quote:
Originally posted by LicentiouslyYours
I wish they made this in a duck version. I have an irrational fear of geese.
LMAO
04/01/2010
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
LOL!
04/01/2010
Contributor: MuffysPinguLove MuffysPinguLove
The honking sounds very appealing! I might have to get one of these
04/01/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
WOW just the thing for those visits to Canada...Arch has a one room apartment so when the three of us pile into the bed there can be a lot of odd sounds. With two of these going in Spring? Why it'd just sound like the Geese happily returning home!

I MUST be allowed to review this product....does it come in purple?

Great review, Thanks!
04/02/2010
Contributor: Jenni Shelton Jenni Shelton
lmao!
09/21/2011
Contributor: FemmeFlo FemmeFlo
If this were a real product, I would be terrified.
11/15/2011
Contributor: winterseve winterseve
OMG I really need one of these. I hate geese but when they honk I go wetter than any other time ever. I can't believe they aren't making them in other Geese types. Canadian geese a turn on but I really want to expand my horizons. I wish they sold the Shotgun Nipple Clamps with this so that my breasts would sounds like they' are hunting the goose with every bounce. Maybe soon they will be a deal special.
03/10/2012