The New Intimacy

Do you initiate the apology?

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Contributor: captainsgirl captainsgirl
If you and your significant other have a fight, regardless if you or they are in the wrong. Do you apologize first or them?
01/22/2013
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Contributor: js250 js250
Usually my --husband?-- apologized. I was too hurt at the time and he got over his issues when he sobered up, of course that would be if he remembered them. Since I was sober, the issues lasted longer and the resentment would fester....
01/23/2013
Contributor: fizzygato fizzygato
Depends.

I feel like lately I initiate it because I feel like nothing will get better unless I do, like most of my friends are pretty stubborn and self-righteous. Also, lately I feel like it genuinely is my fault.

I feel like I've apologized so much these last two years I'm desensitized to it and don't mind owning up to it; whereas in the past I was too prideful to
01/23/2013
Contributor: misterazor misterazor
Quote:
Originally posted by captainsgirl
If you and your significant other have a fight, regardless if you or they are in the wrong. Do you apologize first or them?
i do. i'm not okay with her being upset. i try to fix it. when i'm upset she leaves the room because she's upsetting me and thinks it would be better for me if she left...and that makes me nuts. blah.
01/23/2013
Contributor: Chelynn67 Chelynn67
Quote:
Originally posted by captainsgirl
If you and your significant other have a fight, regardless if you or they are in the wrong. Do you apologize first or them?
I am usually the first one to apologize whether it was my fault or not but if it wasn't, I apologize that we had to fight about it. I hate to fight, I don't usually feel there is a need to fight about something.
01/23/2013
Contributor: deltalima deltalima
Quote:
Originally posted by captainsgirl
If you and your significant other have a fight, regardless if you or they are in the wrong. Do you apologize first or them?
No. I usually didn't initiate the fight and even if I felt like I was wrong, I never apologized first.
01/23/2013
Contributor: doowop doowop
Usually, yes. I like to keep the peace and swallow my pride. I hate to go to bed before a problem is smoothed over.
01/23/2013
Contributor: Rod Ronald Rod Ronald
Always.
01/23/2013
Contributor: captainsgirl captainsgirl
Quote:
Originally posted by captainsgirl
If you and your significant other have a fight, regardless if you or they are in the wrong. Do you apologize first or them?
i am always the first one to apologize. we rarely fight but if we do regardless of whos right i always apologize within five minutes. i cant stand fighting and apologies lead to fixing the problem.
01/23/2013
Contributor: KinkyNicki92 KinkyNicki92
usually my lover says sorry if he knows he was wrong or if he just wants the arguement to be over.
01/23/2013
Contributor: PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
A pretty fair mix.
01/23/2013
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by captainsgirl
If you and your significant other have a fight, regardless if you or they are in the wrong. Do you apologize first or them?
Generally we approach each other after the fireworks because we don't like to let things fester. With three of us in the mix SOMEONE will prod buttock and get the apologies started!
01/23/2013
Contributor: happywaffle34 happywaffle34
Quote:
Originally posted by captainsgirl
If you and your significant other have a fight, regardless if you or they are in the wrong. Do you apologize first or them?
We have been together for 2 and 1/2 years and have never gone to bed mad at each other. As cheesy as that sounds. But it wasn't even an agreement between each other. We don't like fighting or hurting each other's feelings so when it happens we usually both say we are sorry or not say sorry at all cause we know we are without having to say it.
01/23/2013
Contributor: shorejen9 shorejen9
It usually is him but I've been doing it more lately although to be honest we really haven't fought at all in awhile. I am working on not snapping at him when I'm stressed and trying not to use him as a catch all for anger. It's been helping us a lot.
01/23/2013
Contributor: gsfanatic gsfanatic
I tend to apologize if I'm at fault, but I don't pressure her or bring it up if I wasn't at fault
01/23/2013