The New Intimacy

Sleep...sexing?

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Contributor: Peggi Peggi
I know there is a post about sleepwalking right here but this is slightly different...

See, my guy has this little issue with sleepwalking and I am just wondering if anyone has any advice or thoughts on this, or has even experienced this! I know that some people will sleepwalk and have sex and then forget that they even did, but usually those cases are because they have sex with someone they don't particularly want to (wandering over to their hated ex's house and such).

Well, in our case, he will wake up in the middle of the night, initiate sex, sometimes get all the way through without falling asleep, and then forget it ever happened!

I don't mind, but we are wondering what the heck it means. Sometimes we can have sex right before we go to bed, so it isn't that he is being deprived of sex, we have lots of it! Anyone know what else could cause this?

He has had two incidents of sleepwalking where he's taken on aggressive behavior (yelling, throwing things etc) which is a 360 of his personality and he will also say weird things...like that he will drown the guinea pig if it doesn't shut up...we've never owned a guinea pig...
09/29/2011
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Contributor: Illumin8 Illumin8
I have to say I laughed a little at that guinea pig line...

Sounds like a very interesting thing going on! We've never had sleep sex, but I did once start initiating something when I was almost completely asleep but quickly woke up.
09/29/2011
Contributor: Jaimes Jaimes
HA! The guinea pig line was hilarious!

While I'm the sleep-talker of the family, he is the sleep-sexer. He'll roll over and initiate, and the next day, has no recollection. We are also pretty active in our sex life, and I notice it happens if we are going through a particularly close and crush-like spell with one another. He doesn't sleep walk or talk in any other way, though. I however, will shake him awake to tell him something incredibly odd, or ask a bizarre question. When he replies and asks me if I'm asleep, I just giggle madly and doze back off.
09/29/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Some people have what are called parasomnias. These are unusual behaviors during sleep. I sleep walk and talk and so do my kids, we also all experience sleep paralysis and night terrors. (Night time is FUN at our house.) Luckily, my kids have outgrown it.

My neurologist thinks my parasomnias are related to my migraines, but they can be tested in a Sleep Lab and then treated. I found a small dose of Klonopin (0.25 mg) every night nearly completely stops the parasomnias. I haven't woken my husband up with screaming about colorful spiders or "OMG SOMEONE'S IN THE HOUSE. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" for years!

He may want to talk to a neurologist about this. A good sleep lab can find out why he is having episodes. Aggressive episodes are particularly upsetting. I've never had an aggressive episode, but I have done some weird things.
09/29/2011
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
thanks for the info p'gell. and thanks peggi for sharing this thread!

i too have sleep paralysis. i'll wake myself up screaming on purpose from a shitty dream... or be dreaming things are so blurry and keep trying to open my eyes wider to see better and then i wakeup because my eyes are open... wake cody up yelling 'help!' etc...
10/28/2011
Contributor: TameTemptress TameTemptress
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Some people have what are called parasomnias. These are unusual behaviors during sleep. I sleep walk and talk and so do my kids, we also all experience sleep paralysis and night terrors. (Night time is FUN at our house.) Luckily, my kids have ... more
Every once in awhile I wake up because I am JUST SURE there is a spider dangling on his web in front of my face and it's going to crawl on me. I even SEE it, but by the time I jump out of bed screaming I can never find it. It seems so real though that I have trouble reasoning with myself that I must have been dreaming. It's always very unsettling and I have trouble going back to sleep. I never imagined it could be something other than just a dream.
10/28/2011