Yes! I was, and I didn't know it until months after! He acted like he was really into me (pun intended) and then things fizzled out.
Have You Ever Been the Other Woman/Man?
05/05/2011
That's something I would never do unless I wasn't aware. It's just against my morals.
05/05/2011
no couldn't do it,
05/06/2011
I've been asked and my answer was immediately F NO! I would never do it, I would never think of it and I would never speak to a person again who had the nerve to ask me to do that while he's in a relationship. If it comes to the point of cheating then the person should leave, not take the cheap, trashy and easy way out and cheat. I COULD never do that to another woman, even if I hated her. I know how devastated I would be if it happened to me and nothing is worth making a girl feel that way. I would at least wait until they split and if he refused to split up with her, I'd kick his ass for thinking that low of me.
I'm so proud that you turned down the offer! A good woman!
I'm so proud that you turned down the offer! A good woman!
05/11/2011
Wow, that's some pretty even voting there. I've been the Other Woman a few times but I never would again. Too much drama, and I didn't like the way it made me feel less respectful of the lad's official ladyfriend
05/12/2011
Yeah we both have been the "other person" in relationships. For her it she was oblivious to it though. With me.. not so much.
06/14/2011
Quote:
I have never cheated, and will never help someone cheat. Polyamory on the other hand? My boyfriend and I have just opened ourselves up to that. I think it's ridiculous to be dishonest.
Originally posted by
Chilipepper
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in
...
more
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in sex at all since the baby was born (two years ago), and he really misses it.
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
And Chili, you definitely , definitely made the right decision.
I'm poly, so if you're lonely and bi, I'm here.
(Just playing. But really, I respect you for turning him down. A lot.)
06/14/2011
I was never knowingly the other woman. However, there was a guy that I was seeing for a while that happened to be engaged and never told me. Once I found out through the internet, I ended it.
06/30/2011
Nope, but I've been the fallback girl, and I think that sucks pretty good. Kudos for doing the right thing.
10/16/2011
I have been a few times. Both times, I didn't realize it until it had been going on for a while, and I broke them off immediatly.
The second, was a sexual one. I was even pregnant before I found out and when I did find out I lost the baby. Found out, just after I lost mine, she got pregnant and now they have a baby girl.
It hurt ALOT then, but I have since "got over it" and decided it was all for the best. I am a better woman now, and am with the best man in the world! (yes, I know I am biased =P).
I am glad you did the right thing. As all the others said, you deserve to be the one and only. And, to me, what he did was more offensive than flattering. So GOOD JOB! =)
The second, was a sexual one. I was even pregnant before I found out and when I did find out I lost the baby. Found out, just after I lost mine, she got pregnant and now they have a baby girl.
It hurt ALOT then, but I have since "got over it" and decided it was all for the best. I am a better woman now, and am with the best man in the world! (yes, I know I am biased =P).
I am glad you did the right thing. As all the others said, you deserve to be the one and only. And, to me, what he did was more offensive than flattering. So GOOD JOB! =)
10/16/2011
I did not know it at the time but I was. I have never had a man that was the other man.
10/16/2011
I've been doing open relationships for awhile. Some of my partners already had/have girlfriends, which is cool with me ... as long as she is ok with it everything. I always ask those kinds of questions before actually starting anything up with some one, or when a partner I have starts something up with some one new. I ask if she knows.
A few times the answer has been, no, she doesn't know.
And I always say, if you don't tell her, or she's not ok with it, I'm out of here!
I mean, if she can't trust him, how can I?
A few times the answer has been, no, she doesn't know.
And I always say, if you don't tell her, or she's not ok with it, I'm out of here!
I mean, if she can't trust him, how can I?
10/16/2011
yeah it was not good
10/16/2011
I once asked someone to be the "Other Woman". I was quite honest with her about my situation. She needed time to think it over but subsequently declined. If that girl had accepted my request, things would have been way simpler for everyone involved or so I thought. I would have been able to endure an awful marriage without divorce. I still loved my spouse but the abuse she was giving me every day was simply unendurable. The divorce was never completed due to learning that my spouse had cancer. The process up to that point was so painful for my spouse that I will regret it to my dying day. The potential "Other Woman" turned out to have emotional/mental issues that would have been as bad as my spouse had. So actually things would not have been easier. Maybe things DO happen for a reason, who knows?
One good thing that did happen was that I met my current partner. If it weren't for her, despair would have taken me, she saved my life. If you're reading this Baby, Thank You. To her credit, my GF was supportive of me when I needed to care for my spouse when the cancer got worse.
I don't really have faith in an Almighty anymore. But who knows, with all of the chance occurrences that had to happen for me to finally end up with my GF now, maybe there really is divine guidance. If there is an Almighty, he's one hell of a fucked up jokester...
I kind of like that though.
One good thing that did happen was that I met my current partner. If it weren't for her, despair would have taken me, she saved my life. If you're reading this Baby, Thank You. To her credit, my GF was supportive of me when I needed to care for my spouse when the cancer got worse.
I don't really have faith in an Almighty anymore. But who knows, with all of the chance occurrences that had to happen for me to finally end up with my GF now, maybe there really is divine guidance. If there is an Almighty, he's one hell of a fucked up jokester...
I kind of like that though.
10/16/2011
Quote:
ive been the other 2 times and I didnt even no it until months into dating.i just thought they were busy..because of course they were really good liars too.ive stayed talkin to one because by the time i found out i had gotten feelings for him.i wouldnt go in knowing id be the other woman though..just because i wouldnt want to be the main woman and have my man do that to me.
Originally posted by
Chilipepper
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in
...
more
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in sex at all since the baby was born (two years ago), and he really misses it.
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
11/21/2011
that can never happen that´s the worst thing ,,, great if you leave the relationship you deserve best
11/21/2011
Nope.
12/21/2011
Quote:
It is an added strain.. you know what you are doing is wrong and that your hurting someone, but being bad feels pretty good..
Originally posted by
Chilipepper
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in
...
more
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in sex at all since the baby was born (two years ago), and he really misses it.
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
01/27/2012
Quote:
I chose other. I am kind of in the same situation as yourself. I am in the process of finding my mate/Dom, and I do believe I have found Him. The only problem is that He is married and has a family. He's polyamorous, and I am pretty sure that I am not. I would love to get married one day, but He is already happily married, so that dream of mine would never come true. It's sad because I am crazy about Him, but I don't quite know where I stand.
Originally posted by
Chilipepper
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in
...
more
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in sex at all since the baby was born (two years ago), and he really misses it.
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
08/13/2012
I have been a few times during transitions, but only once with someone married. I only did it because I was madly in love at the time and nothing ever got past the talking stage for a good 6 or more months, but it was pretty much love at first sight and I wanted to marry her (if she got divorced). Didn't happen. It was joyful and painful at the same time and eventually had to end.
I think he should ask his wife if he can have sex with someone else if she isn't willing to put out maybe and be honest about it, but few women could handle that.
I think he should ask his wife if he can have sex with someone else if she isn't willing to put out maybe and be honest about it, but few women could handle that.
08/13/2012
Quote:
I was unknowlingly the other woman for a while, and found out and ended it. I think you are making the right decision. If and when he is "free" then maybe hook up, but being the other woman is just setting you up to get hurt.
Originally posted by
Chilipepper
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in
...
more
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in sex at all since the baby was born (two years ago), and he really misses it.
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
08/13/2012
I was unknowingly the other woman for about 4 months, until I found out that he was married I ended it right away.
08/14/2012
I have been. It was a dumb high school decision. I probably wouldn't do it again but I guess it would depend on the situation. If they were going through a break up or something I might consider it, but I wouldn't just cheat with someone without it being clear that their relationship was going to end and I wasn't causing a problem.
08/14/2012
Quote:
I opted for other. She felt like I was the other women, when in all honesty I was not. She began dating my best friend, whom she met at my house, and after they got serious she felt like I was keeping him from committing to her because of the time we spent together.
Originally posted by
Chilipepper
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in
...
more
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in sex at all since the baby was born (two years ago), and he really misses it.
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
08/15/2012
Yes, once.
08/15/2012
Quote:
No, it hasn't happened.
Originally posted by
Chilipepper
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in
...
more
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in sex at all since the baby was born (two years ago), and he really misses it.
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
08/15/2012
Yes, once...thats all I have to say about that.
08/15/2012
Thinking about it now, I guess I was.
Back in college one of the lesbian girls had a fight with her girlfriend and started dating me. Yvonne's ex was taller, younger and stronger than me. That particular short time ex was also on the softball team and probably wanted to and could have whipped my ass. So I guess I was lucky that it didn't go on longer.
Back in college one of the lesbian girls had a fight with her girlfriend and started dating me. Yvonne's ex was taller, younger and stronger than me. That particular short time ex was also on the softball team and probably wanted to and could have whipped my ass. So I guess I was lucky that it didn't go on longer.
08/15/2012
Quote:
No, it hasn't happened.
Originally posted by
Chilipepper
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in
...
more
I had recently been offered the position of 'mistress' by another friend from high school who had regarded me a close friend back in the day and trusted me not to go all drama on him. He says that his girlfriend hasn't had any interest in sex at all since the baby was born (two years ago), and he really misses it.
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
I'm flattered, but also miffed that I'm regarded with such disrespect as to want the thankless position of being 'the other woman'. After being with Mulder (who had been separated from his wife for three years by the time we got together, but still had to look after his family with her), I had discovered that I don't like living out Whitney Houston's song "Saving All My Love For You". I would prefer to be his first priority, not the last and when he can find time for me.
I said I'd think about it, but I decided I will turn it down (mainly due to not wanting to participate in any pain this would cause his family just because his girlfriend's Closed For Business For Eternity). Which is a royal pain in the ass, because I want him, too. I did the Right Thing - so I got some Karma points, but I'm still miserably alone with unfulfilled needs.
So, the question: have you ever been the other woman or man? Feel free to share your thoughts, too. less
08/15/2012
I've never been the other woman
08/16/2012