I love my husband to death, but when it comes to foreplay we are lacking at least foreplay that is thrown my may (oral sex). I am always the one giving does anyone one know of anyways i could get my husband to reciprocate the favor? Any tricks or comments will be appreciated thanks.
Husband only likes foreplay his way
05/28/2012
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The obvious answer is that you have to talk to him about it - and gently guide him towards the things you like. You may have to be more aggressive. Instead of just giving him head - flip around and go 69 - it's a not so subtle hint!
05/28/2012
I agree with Gunsmoke. Also, if talking doesn't help, holding out usually does
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end only, and it was frustrating. When talking didn't work, I got to the point where I figured hey, if he wants it badly enough, he'll compromise if I don't give him a choice, and it worked!
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end only, and it was frustrating. When talking didn't work, I got to the point where I figured hey, if he wants it badly enough, he'll compromise if I don't give him a choice, and it worked!
05/29/2012
I think if you can't talk with him about it, there are some pretty sexy ways of getting him intersted in taking care of you....saying something like, "I need your mouth on me." "when you're finished with me, I'm going to blow your mind" I know for my man and I, it turns him on to know that I'm thinking about going down on him while he's going down on me. Does he not realize that you're needing that from him, or is he just lazy about it?
05/29/2012
Quote:
wouldn't say lazy, lol but its bot getting dine even though i tell him....lol i guess its never been a real big thing with him =(..lol
Originally posted by
PropertyOfPotter
I think if you can't talk with him about it, there are some pretty sexy ways of getting him intersted in taking care of you....saying something like, "I need your mouth on me." "when you're finished with me, I'm going to
...
more
I think if you can't talk with him about it, there are some pretty sexy ways of getting him intersted in taking care of you....saying something like, "I need your mouth on me." "when you're finished with me, I'm going to blow your mind" I know for my man and I, it turns him on to know that I'm thinking about going down on him while he's going down on me. Does he not realize that you're needing that from him, or is he just lazy about it?
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05/29/2012
Quote:
lol yeah Peggi that's what i'm doing now...lol we will see how long it takes
Originally posted by
Peggi
I agree with Gunsmoke. Also, if talking doesn't help, holding out usually does
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end ... more
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end ... more
I agree with Gunsmoke. Also, if talking doesn't help, holding out usually does
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end only, and it was frustrating. When talking didn't work, I got to the point where I figured hey, if he wants it badly enough, he'll compromise if I don't give him a choice, and it worked! less
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end only, and it was frustrating. When talking didn't work, I got to the point where I figured hey, if he wants it badly enough, he'll compromise if I don't give him a choice, and it worked! less
05/29/2012
Quote:
will have to try that
Originally posted by
Gunsmoke
The obvious answer is that you have to talk to him about it - and gently guide him towards the things you like. You may have to be more aggressive. Instead of just giving him head - flip around and go 69 - it's a not so subtle hint!
05/29/2012
When your partner respects you, he cares about your pleasure.
When did this selfish behavior start?
Was he doing what you needed to get to your orgasm, and giving you enough time before?
Did things change after the wedding? (In other words does he think he doesn't have to try now that he has you in a situation where it would be difficult for you to get it from someone who DOES care?)
Did he stop giving you what you needed recently?
Was he always a selfish lover? If so, did you think things would magically change?
WHERE and WHEN did he get so selfish? Or was he always this way? IF he was always this way, you have a LOT of thinking to do.....
When did this selfish behavior start?
Was he doing what you needed to get to your orgasm, and giving you enough time before?
Did things change after the wedding? (In other words does he think he doesn't have to try now that he has you in a situation where it would be difficult for you to get it from someone who DOES care?)
Did he stop giving you what you needed recently?
Was he always a selfish lover? If so, did you think things would magically change?
WHERE and WHEN did he get so selfish? Or was he always this way? IF he was always this way, you have a LOT of thinking to do.....
05/29/2012
Quote:
I would not advocate this. Holding out on sex to manipulate a situation is kind of low and will generally cause more problems than it fixes. He's an ex for a reason, right?
Originally posted by
Peggi
I agree with Gunsmoke. Also, if talking doesn't help, holding out usually does
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end ... more
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end ... more
I agree with Gunsmoke. Also, if talking doesn't help, holding out usually does
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end only, and it was frustrating. When talking didn't work, I got to the point where I figured hey, if he wants it badly enough, he'll compromise if I don't give him a choice, and it worked! less
I lucked out with my husband, because he is more concerned with pleasing me than having me please him, but I had an ex who wanted to be on the receiving end only, and it was frustrating. When talking didn't work, I got to the point where I figured hey, if he wants it badly enough, he'll compromise if I don't give him a choice, and it worked! less
To the OP: Open and honest communication about your sexual needs is, really, the only mature and productive way to get what you need. If he isn't concerned with your sexual pleasure, then you might want to find out why. Sexual relationships are about mutual pleasure and if he wants to be in a mature, sexual relationship, he needs to act maturely.
05/29/2012
Quote:
"i guess its never been a real big thing with him =(..lol "
Originally posted by
CRAZYSEXYONE
wouldn't say lazy, lol but its bot getting dine even though i tell him....lol i guess its never been a real big thing with him =(..lol
If it's never been a real big thing with him, then he most likely doesn't think it's important, doesn't want to do it, or doesn't like it. You NEED to talk to him. But don't corner him saying things like your selfish lover, you never care about my pleasure, and so on. You need to do it in a way that doesn't hurt his ego.
Also, like gunsmoke suggested 69. When I'm trying to be sneaky about hinting I want oral, I go for 69. He will usually be laying on the bed and I'll put my head down by his feet and my feet by his head. Then I start oral sex, but touch myself at the same time. Usually that makes him dive right in. Maybe you can try that?
05/29/2012
Quote:
I agree with part of what you are saying, Beck. But sometimes you need to label a behavior, or the perpetrator gets off Scott Free.
Originally posted by
Beck
"i guess its never been a real big thing with him =(..lol "
If it's never been a real big thing with him, then he most likely doesn't think it's important, doesn't want to do it, or doesn't like it. You NEED to ... more
If it's never been a real big thing with him, then he most likely doesn't think it's important, doesn't want to do it, or doesn't like it. You NEED to ... more
"i guess its never been a real big thing with him =(..lol "
If it's never been a real big thing with him, then he most likely doesn't think it's important, doesn't want to do it, or doesn't like it. You NEED to talk to him. But don't corner him saying things like your selfish lover, you never care about my pleasure, and so on. You need to do it in a way that doesn't hurt his ego.
Also, like gunsmoke suggested 69. When I'm trying to be sneaky about hinting I want oral, I go for 69. He will usually be laying on the bed and I'll put my head down by his feet and my feet by his head. Then I start oral sex, but touch myself at the same time. Usually that makes him dive right in. Maybe you can try that? less
If it's never been a real big thing with him, then he most likely doesn't think it's important, doesn't want to do it, or doesn't like it. You NEED to talk to him. But don't corner him saying things like your selfish lover, you never care about my pleasure, and so on. You need to do it in a way that doesn't hurt his ego.
Also, like gunsmoke suggested 69. When I'm trying to be sneaky about hinting I want oral, I go for 69. He will usually be laying on the bed and I'll put my head down by his feet and my feet by his head. Then I start oral sex, but touch myself at the same time. Usually that makes him dive right in. Maybe you can try that? less
Selfish behavior should be identified, IMO. Not in a "YOU do this." way but in a "I need to have fun in bed too, and when you act selfishly, by thinking you are the only one who gets to have an orgasm during sex, it hurts me."
I'm kind of thinking if "He never thought it was a big thing for him." (being caring in bed?) then WHY did this relationship go forward? Was there magical thinking involved? The If I do this, he's "change" kind of thing, and those of us in long term relationships know we can't "change" anybody but ourselves.
05/29/2012
see the thing about it is he told me to wait till we got married so I thought i was going to be gettimg it. but i should have not listened i kinda knew in the back of my head i guess it was never going to change been with him 7 years I guess i shouldn't expect things to change over night but we have been married for a year...lol
05/29/2012
Quote:
My brain just exploded.
Originally posted by
CRAZYSEXYONE
see the thing about it is he told me to wait till we got married so I thought i was going to be gettimg it. but i should have not listened i kinda knew in the back of my head i guess it was never going to change been with him 7 years I guess i
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more
see the thing about it is he told me to wait till we got married so I thought i was going to be gettimg it. but i should have not listened i kinda knew in the back of my head i guess it was never going to change been with him 7 years I guess i shouldn't expect things to change over night but we have been married for a year...lol
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He asked you to wait until you were married for oral sex?!?!
05/29/2012
Quote:
yeah i guess i was a fool not to smart. i guess i really sound like it to never really thought about it till i started talking about it
Originally posted by
BBW Talks Toys
My brain just exploded.
He asked you to wait until you were married for oral sex?!?!
He asked you to wait until you were married for oral sex?!?!
05/30/2012
Quote:
i would be strait forward with him because you no sometimes as guys we cant take a hint.Tell him that you don't like being the only one going oral when foreplay
Originally posted by
CRAZYSEXYONE
I love my husband to death, but when it comes to foreplay we are lacking at least foreplay that is thrown my may (oral sex). I am always the one giving does anyone one know of anyways i could get my husband to reciprocate the favor? Any tricks or
...
more
I love my husband to death, but when it comes to foreplay we are lacking at least foreplay that is thrown my may (oral sex). I am always the one giving does anyone one know of anyways i could get my husband to reciprocate the favor? Any tricks or comments will be appreciated thanks.
less
06/01/2012
Quote:
thanks yeah I think that might be the thing to do, thats where everyone is pointing me thanks for the responds
Originally posted by
Mr. Tickle and Giggle
i would be strait forward with him because you no sometimes as guys we cant take a hint.Tell him that you don't like being the only one going oral when foreplay
06/02/2012
Quote:
I had the same reaction. Mine would have been to boot him to the curb when he mentioned this.
Originally posted by
BBW Talks Toys
My brain just exploded.
He asked you to wait until you were married for oral sex?!?!
He asked you to wait until you were married for oral sex?!?!
So, CSO (The OP) you didn't have oral sex for seven years? Did he get oral sex from you? Were you having PIV sex?
How did it just "not occur" to you? I'm a little flabbergasted here. My sex life is one of the most important things in my life and nothing goes without being thought about. Hon, what were you thinking about those seven years?
You have to sit this boy down and have a talk with him. Hell, this bullshit he pulled on you might even be grounds for an annulment (I don't know this for sure, but it seems VERY dishonest and manipulative of him.)
06/02/2012
Honestly I just tell my guy to give me head lol I usually make sure its right after a shower and he KNOWS I just got out of the shower, just in case he has any qualms about doing it...its getting hot out now and I feel more comfy knowing everything is fresh down there as well lol.
06/03/2012
Quote:
for the first couple years i guess I was just out to keep him happy. but then that grew old and the urge crept in. I started to ask and thats when he said when we get married. then we got married and it wasn't till our year anniversary that i got it that was in April the one and only time. he will play just not oral. it hasn't really gotten to me till lately guess more time to think about it. I have not been into it that much lately
Originally posted by
P'Gell
I had the same reaction. Mine would have been to boot him to the curb when he mentioned this.
So, CSO (The OP) you didn't have oral sex for seven years? Did he get oral sex from you? Were you having PIV sex?
How did it just ... more
So, CSO (The OP) you didn't have oral sex for seven years? Did he get oral sex from you? Were you having PIV sex?
How did it just ... more
I had the same reaction. Mine would have been to boot him to the curb when he mentioned this.
So, CSO (The OP) you didn't have oral sex for seven years? Did he get oral sex from you? Were you having PIV sex?
How did it just "not occur" to you? I'm a little flabbergasted here. My sex life is one of the most important things in my life and nothing goes without being thought about. Hon, what were you thinking about those seven years?
You have to sit this boy down and have a talk with him. Hell, this bullshit he pulled on you might even be grounds for an annulment (I don't know this for sure, but it seems VERY dishonest and manipulative of him.) less
So, CSO (The OP) you didn't have oral sex for seven years? Did he get oral sex from you? Were you having PIV sex?
How did it just "not occur" to you? I'm a little flabbergasted here. My sex life is one of the most important things in my life and nothing goes without being thought about. Hon, what were you thinking about those seven years?
You have to sit this boy down and have a talk with him. Hell, this bullshit he pulled on you might even be grounds for an annulment (I don't know this for sure, but it seems VERY dishonest and manipulative of him.) less
06/04/2012
Total posts: 19
Unique posters: 9