I currently looking up a couple's sex therapist for me and my wife. One group I just checked out was all women and one very creepy looking dude. Sure enough he is the licensed "Sex Therapy Diplomate". I'm thinking it's hard enough to get my wife to open up to me, is she going to open up and talk sex with some strange guy?
If you went to see a sex therapist, would you prefer a man or a women?
10/08/2012
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I'm unbiased.
10/08/2012
Generally my preference for therapists has been for female ones, though it's not a strong preference. If you and your wife are going to talk to a sex therapist you should definitely talk with her first and see if she does have a strong preference one way or the other (rather than just guessing at it). Some people are much more comfortable opening up to someone of one sex or the other, while for other people it is all about the personality of the therapist involved.
10/08/2012
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If I could talk to my wife and get that answer out of her we wouldn't need a therapist. But after doing some digging it looks like I have little choice as it's getting more and more appearant that all the therapist in my state who specialize in couple's sex are men.
Originally posted by
Ciao.
Generally my preference for therapists has been for female ones, though it's not a strong preference. If you and your wife are going to talk to a sex therapist you should definitely talk with her first and see if she does have a strong
...
more
Generally my preference for therapists has been for female ones, though it's not a strong preference. If you and your wife are going to talk to a sex therapist you should definitely talk with her first and see if she does have a strong preference one way or the other (rather than just guessing at it). Some people are much more comfortable opening up to someone of one sex or the other, while for other people it is all about the personality of the therapist involved.
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10/08/2012
Doesn't matter really.
10/08/2012
OK, just found a few female therapist at Planned Parenthood of all places.
10/08/2012
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Hey, wait, you're looking into getting a therapist? Good for you, man! Good luck.
Originally posted by
Istanbull
OK, just found a few female therapist at Planned Parenthood of all places.
10/08/2012
The gender of the therapist doesn't really matter to me. That being said, if someone strikes you as creepy or makes you uncomfortable in anyway, that's probably not the therapist for you.
10/08/2012
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That's fantastic! Good luck!
Originally posted by
Istanbull
OK, just found a few female therapist at Planned Parenthood of all places.
10/08/2012
I would be more comfortable with a man. Why? Because I have no problem openly admitting that I don't trust women around my husband and I have heard too many stories about therapists sleeping with their clients. It might be urban myth but I'm not going to put myself in that position.
That being said, it's definitely something you'll have to try out and give her the option of picking the therapist herself.
That being said, it's definitely something you'll have to try out and give her the option of picking the therapist herself.
10/08/2012
I would rather talk to another woman.
10/08/2012
I think I would prefer a man.
10/08/2012
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I want her to chose herself but given me knowing her I would bank on her being more closed to a man then a woman because I suspect she would feel ganged up on. But I bet she wouldn't even tell me either way, this is a woman who can't even talk about sex in front of her husband.
Originally posted by
Ansley
I would be more comfortable with a man. Why? Because I have no problem openly admitting that I don't trust women around my husband and I have heard too many stories about therapists sleeping with their clients. It might be urban myth but I'm
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more
I would be more comfortable with a man. Why? Because I have no problem openly admitting that I don't trust women around my husband and I have heard too many stories about therapists sleeping with their clients. It might be urban myth but I'm not going to put myself in that position.
That being said, it's definitely something you'll have to try out and give her the option of picking the therapist herself. less
That being said, it's definitely something you'll have to try out and give her the option of picking the therapist herself. less
10/08/2012
Another woman.
10/08/2012
I have a slight preference for a woman therapist, but I care far more about the therapist's training, qualifications and reputation than I do gender.
I am so happy for you that you're pursuing therapy! I think it greatly increases your odds for lasting change and improvement in your sex life! I wish you all the best!!!
I am so happy for you that you're pursuing therapy! I think it greatly increases your odds for lasting change and improvement in your sex life! I wish you all the best!!!
10/08/2012
woman
10/08/2012
Yes, good for you! That's a major step in and of itself. The best of luck to you guys.
Personally, I wouldn't care either way. But if your wife would prefer a woman, and it's all the same to you, then go for a woman. A good therapist, is a good therapist--what you guys are comfortable with is what matters.
Personally, I wouldn't care either way. But if your wife would prefer a woman, and it's all the same to you, then go for a woman. A good therapist, is a good therapist--what you guys are comfortable with is what matters.
10/08/2012
Yes, good for you! That's a major step in and of itself. The best of luck to you guys.
Personally, I wouldn't care either way. But if your wife would prefer a woman, and it's all the same to you, then go for a woman. A good therapist, is a good therapist--what you guys are comfortable with is what matters.
Personally, I wouldn't care either way. But if your wife would prefer a woman, and it's all the same to you, then go for a woman. A good therapist, is a good therapist--what you guys are comfortable with is what matters.
10/08/2012
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It's not going to happen. I just confronted her about it. "Remember yesterday when I said I think we should see a sex therapist? Would you be more comfortible with a man or a women? I would like to contact one and set something up." Her response was just what I knew it would be.
Originally posted by
Supervixen
Yes, good for you! That's a major step in and of itself. The best of luck to you guys.
Personally, I wouldn't care either way. But if your wife would prefer a woman, and it's all the same to you, then go for a woman. A good ... more
Personally, I wouldn't care either way. But if your wife would prefer a woman, and it's all the same to you, then go for a woman. A good ... more
Yes, good for you! That's a major step in and of itself. The best of luck to you guys.
Personally, I wouldn't care either way. But if your wife would prefer a woman, and it's all the same to you, then go for a woman. A good therapist, is a good therapist--what you guys are comfortable with is what matters. less
Personally, I wouldn't care either way. But if your wife would prefer a woman, and it's all the same to you, then go for a woman. A good therapist, is a good therapist--what you guys are comfortable with is what matters. less
"It doesn't matter. I'm not going."
She thinks this is me saying I want to leave her, which I assured it wasn't or I would have already left and we wouldn't be having this conversation. Then she changed the conversation to some typical irrelivent crap about some co-worker conversation she had that day. I said "See, this is why I think we need to see a therapist." She just guarded more. I just said "Forget I even asked mentioned it then. I can see it'll help nothing." and that was as far as it went.
I'm going to have to just learn to live this way until she gets out of school and starts her new career. If things are still this way by then, at least I can begin considering a divorce and know she will be able to take care of herself without me.
10/08/2012
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Does she have a preferred gender for an OBGYN? If she does, chances are that is what she would be most comfortable talking openly with.
Originally posted by
Istanbull
I want her to chose herself but given me knowing her I would bank on her being more closed to a man then a woman because I suspect she would feel ganged up on. But I bet she wouldn't even tell me either way, this is a woman who can't even
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more
I want her to chose herself but given me knowing her I would bank on her being more closed to a man then a woman because I suspect she would feel ganged up on. But I bet she wouldn't even tell me either way, this is a woman who can't even talk about sex in front of her husband.
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10/09/2012
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It sounds like your wife is very insecure about herself. She thinks you are trying to leave her when you ask for couples therapy. Sounds like she needs therapy on her own and as a couple. Is she on any depression or anxiety medication? If not, she should really talk to her doctor about it. It sounds like this might be the entire issue. If she is taking these medications or will be, remember they lower sex drive for some.
Originally posted by
Istanbull
It's not going to happen. I just confronted her about it. "Remember yesterday when I said I think we should see a sex therapist? Would you be more comfortible with a man or a women? I would like to contact one and set something up." Her
...
more
It's not going to happen. I just confronted her about it. "Remember yesterday when I said I think we should see a sex therapist? Would you be more comfortible with a man or a women? I would like to contact one and set something up." Her response was just what I knew it would be.
"It doesn't matter. I'm not going."
She thinks this is me saying I want to leave her, which I assured it wasn't or I would have already left and we wouldn't be having this conversation. Then she changed the conversation to some typical irrelivent crap about some co-worker conversation she had that day. I said "See, this is why I think we need to see a therapist." She just guarded more. I just said "Forget I even asked mentioned it then. I can see it'll help nothing." and that was as far as it went.
I'm going to have to just learn to live this way until she gets out of school and starts her new career. If things are still this way by then, at least I can begin considering a divorce and know she will be able to take care of herself without me. less
"It doesn't matter. I'm not going."
She thinks this is me saying I want to leave her, which I assured it wasn't or I would have already left and we wouldn't be having this conversation. Then she changed the conversation to some typical irrelivent crap about some co-worker conversation she had that day. I said "See, this is why I think we need to see a therapist." She just guarded more. I just said "Forget I even asked mentioned it then. I can see it'll help nothing." and that was as far as it went.
I'm going to have to just learn to live this way until she gets out of school and starts her new career. If things are still this way by then, at least I can begin considering a divorce and know she will be able to take care of herself without me. less
10/09/2012
I would not care who it was as long as they could help me.
10/09/2012
I voted "woman" but really I don't care as long as they could help us and not try to sleep with either one of us. lol
10/09/2012
I wouldn't have a preference.
10/09/2012
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No she's not on any. She has always been this way. She doesn't act depressed, instead she's just highly repressed. She won't talk about sex with me for anything. I've tried to get her to share her fantasies with me but she insist she doesn't have them. She's had wet dreams once in a great while, in which case I do get laid. But she is so embarrased by them that she refuses to tell me anything about them.
Originally posted by
Beck
It sounds like your wife is very insecure about herself. She thinks you are trying to leave her when you ask for couples therapy. Sounds like she needs therapy on her own and as a couple. Is she on any depression or anxiety medication? If not, she
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more
It sounds like your wife is very insecure about herself. She thinks you are trying to leave her when you ask for couples therapy. Sounds like she needs therapy on her own and as a couple. Is she on any depression or anxiety medication? If not, she should really talk to her doctor about it. It sounds like this might be the entire issue. If she is taking these medications or will be, remember they lower sex drive for some.
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10/09/2012
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planned parenthood! what a great idea! I'll have to look there. personally I don't think gender would matter much to me
Originally posted by
Istanbull
OK, just found a few female therapist at Planned Parenthood of all places.
10/09/2012
A woman.
10/09/2012
Either way honestly, as long as they're a well educated professional
10/10/2012
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Oh no. I still think pursuing therapy is wise. If she refuses to go you can still go on your own. It is so painful and frustrating when your partner does not share your goals! Therapy may give you tools to cope with this in healthier ways! Hang in there!
Originally posted by
Istanbull
It's not going to happen. I just confronted her about it. "Remember yesterday when I said I think we should see a sex therapist? Would you be more comfortible with a man or a women? I would like to contact one and set something up." Her
...
more
It's not going to happen. I just confronted her about it. "Remember yesterday when I said I think we should see a sex therapist? Would you be more comfortible with a man or a women? I would like to contact one and set something up." Her response was just what I knew it would be.
"It doesn't matter. I'm not going."
She thinks this is me saying I want to leave her, which I assured it wasn't or I would have already left and we wouldn't be having this conversation. Then she changed the conversation to some typical irrelivent crap about some co-worker conversation she had that day. I said "See, this is why I think we need to see a therapist." She just guarded more. I just said "Forget I even asked mentioned it then. I can see it'll help nothing." and that was as far as it went.
I'm going to have to just learn to live this way until she gets out of school and starts her new career. If things are still this way by then, at least I can begin considering a divorce and know she will be able to take care of herself without me. less
"It doesn't matter. I'm not going."
She thinks this is me saying I want to leave her, which I assured it wasn't or I would have already left and we wouldn't be having this conversation. Then she changed the conversation to some typical irrelivent crap about some co-worker conversation she had that day. I said "See, this is why I think we need to see a therapist." She just guarded more. I just said "Forget I even asked mentioned it then. I can see it'll help nothing." and that was as far as it went.
I'm going to have to just learn to live this way until she gets out of school and starts her new career. If things are still this way by then, at least I can begin considering a divorce and know she will be able to take care of herself without me. less
10/10/2012
I don't think the gender would matter since they're professionals regardless of their gender and regardless its an outside point of view which is what I'd like
01/24/2013
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Unique posters: 20