Do you ever get jealous of your partners past?

Contributor: LavenderSkies LavenderSkies
Poll
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Yes, all the time
7  (8%)
Sometimes
27  (30%)
No, thats water under the bridge
42  (47%)
Other
13  (15%)
Total votes: 89
Poll is closed
02/24/2012
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Contributor: js250 js250
I used to when he would use it against me, things like his ex-wife, etc. Now I just feel like if it was that great, he would still be living it--that actually shut it down when he got the fact that he was losing me due to his actions and words.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Undead Undead
Quote:
Originally posted by LavenderSkies
Poll
No, that's just childish and causes un-needed problems
02/24/2012
Contributor: BlooJay BlooJay
I'm not the jealous type.
02/24/2012
Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
I do. Especially since his kids are a constant reminder. I know, I know, I knew what I was getting into. My fault.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
Can't say I'm jealous, I just don't want to know their history, same goes for my husband.
02/24/2012
Contributor: WanderlustinGypsy WanderlustinGypsy
I put sometimes. Sometimes, I must admit, I get a little insecure about his past, I know he's been with women who were more experienced than me, prettier than me, etc. Early on in our relationship he cheated on me, and that's been hard to deal with, but it's been several years now, and things are much better. Honestly, this site helps me a lot, when I start feeling insecure about our love life, I just come on here and look for ways to spice things up.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
When feeling particularly resentful against my ex-husband (while we were married), I was jealous of those in his past that actually had sex from him. Despite his declarations and assurances of my desirability, he didn't do a damn thing about it. Then he pushed me away when I tried to start anything.

(Any wonder I don't believe anyone who says they want me?)

Was never jealous about Master's past. A little sad that we didn't find each other before our spouses entered the picture, but that's long gone.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
I have to say not really and I hope he is not jealous of my past either. For me the past is the past and the now is what is important to grow with each other.
02/24/2012
Contributor: xoxo xoxo
No people shouldn't worry about other people's pasts
02/24/2012
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I don't get jealous because nothing in his past is a threat to me, but I am sometimes envious of some of the really awesome experiences he's had and that he's so close with his family. I grew up in a very different environment and it sometimes stings when I hear about those things, but I get over it. It's not like I had a choice in who raised me, nor did he. And I would never want to take that away from him.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Badass Badass
only sometimes..
like he had a 3some once, and I'm jealous I wasn't there..
sounds kind of stupid typed out..
02/24/2012
Contributor: unfulfilled unfulfilled
No I do not, we all have one.
02/24/2012
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Nope. He's older than I am and had women before me and while we had an open relationship (of course, I had other men during our Open phase, too) but it isn't a big deal.

How could he have known he would meet me? How could we have known what would happen after our Open phase?
02/24/2012
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
When feeling particularly resentful against my ex-husband (while we were married), I was jealous of those in his past that actually had sex from him. Despite his declarations and assurances of my desirability, he didn't do a damn thing about it. ... more
Chili, honey, do you mind if I ask? Do you think he really did, or did he just say he did have women before? My instinct tells me an asexual man (or one who behaves as one) has always been that way.

Do you think he was just saying he had other women before to cover something up or just to hurt you?

I'm guessing he has never, but I don't know the man, so....
02/24/2012
Contributor: sweetiejo sweetiejo
No I usually don't get jealous about his past, but I do have issues when he is talking about his exes. His friends and him like to discuss his exes a lot when in front of me and it does get awkward for me.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Eliyahu Eliyahu
Yes, when it seems like/feels like she dwells on it. Everyone has a past, and I'm totally fine with that, but IMO the past is the past and should stay there...we're a product of it, and wouldn't have our experience without it, but to fantasize about it is another matter entirely. My past is in the past for good reasons...very good reasons.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
Not jealous, but disturbed! My hubby was last with his ex wives sister (before me.) To me that is something that he shouldn't of done. I think this is a violation of sister codes, but it was more wrong on her part. I try not to think about it, but he will tell you the only reason he did it was so he could call his ex wife and tell her that her sister was better, well that just makes it sound like you still want your ex wife, so the closest thing was her sister and you jumped on that wagon. I just think this is wrong, but that is my opinion.
02/24/2012
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
I used to get insecure about a partner's past. Now, I'd prefer someone who's had a few runs around the block. I wouldn't want to be with an inexperienced partner, just for the worry that they may want to leave to do other things they couldn't do with me.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
I get envious over things sometimes. Usually it's when I feel like an ex got "more" than me in some way.

It's definitely less about him and his past and more about my own insecurities when it happens. The older I get, though, the more I realize you just can't compare yourself, your relationships or your situation with anything. It is what it is right now and you can only make the very best of what it is instead of thinking it'll be... something that used to be (that didn't last so why do you want it anyhow!?)
02/24/2012
Contributor: The Mother of a SiNner The Mother of a SiNner
Quote:
Originally posted by LavenderSkies
Poll
not at all im who he chose for ever
02/24/2012
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
There were a few things I was jealous of, but petty things like different sexual experiences that I've just never had the drive for. But I know all of his ex girlfriends, and I'm not jealous of all the mental issues that most of them had and I know that he has no desire to ever feel the anguish that they put him through again, so I know I have nothing to worry about.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Ms. N Ms. N
He doesn't really have much of one to be jealous of. I think there have been about a half dozen girls that he has been involved with, and those "relationships" lasted no more than a few months, at most. We've been a part of each other's lives for over 10 years, and they are all long, long gone, so no jealousy from me at all.
02/24/2012
Contributor: Woman China Woman China
Sometimes. But it is not jealousy really, it's more my own insecurities creeping up on me that I thought I dealt with and was able to put behind me. Then I get angry at myself and take it out on him.

But I get laughed at because he knows I care for him. He feels flattered that he's broken the "ice princess" down. I do tell him about it so he knows what's in my head and it doesn't happen all that often.

For men that I do not have feelings for? LOL!!! I couldn't care less about their pasts (safe sex!). Just get annoyed when they are trying to turn me on in bed telling me about all the women they've slept with. Just not the time nor the place for that conversation!
02/24/2012
Contributor: SiNn SiNn
Quote:
Originally posted by LavenderSkies
Poll
woudl depend i wouldnt let an ex he loved or was in lovee with move in but no i havent
02/24/2012
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Chili, honey, do you mind if I ask? Do you think he really did, or did he just say he did have women before? My instinct tells me an asexual man (or one who behaves as one) has always been that way.

Do you think he was just saying he had ... more
There seems to have been only two that affected him - the girl who took his virginity (she was 13, he was 11) and a pregnant woman when he was in college; hen mentioned them at the beginning of our relationship and that was the only time. But, as you said, that could just be what he claimed. He convinced me in our online courtship that he had a pretty healthy libido ... but perhaps it was a matter of chemistry or something when we were finally in person. *shrug* Eh, over with.
02/24/2012
Contributor: DreamWolf DreamWolf
Well, when I think of some extremely pleasant things from my Master's Past Life knowing that maybe I will never be able to have some I so badly want, yes, whenever that happens with me am all jealous as hell! ~lol ~blushes

For example that when He was younger He was of course as enthusiastic as one can be about mating with others, and now that my Darlin Dearest PreciousMaster is older He is just mellower and not such a Hungry Beast anymore...
Am still all so young and hungry, and though I know that it is only stress for now that His Mind is elsewhere, I still worry almost daily if I will ever be able to experience all the wonderful things with Him what He has already got His Fill of, if I will have it too, or just live my life with Him without ever catching up and knowing that there is something to be totally entirely satisfied about... He knows it blissfully and it bothers Him too that things just aren't so perfect that He would be in the Mood for such things, so I have all my hopes in it that my life won't just vanish without experiencing the very best finest things in it... That pretty much keeps me cheered up mostly, and helps me wait better and in a more optimistic and happy way, otherwise I would be depressed and doubtful all the time, because what if He will never give me all those wonderful experiences (and of course I want no one else in my life, so I can rely only on Him), because of whatever reason, then I will be all old and when He is gone already then my life will be all like an extremely pleasant memory with a big fuckin hole in it...! ~yowls loud

So yep, I must admit that I am jealous all the time, until I can have my fill too, and not worry about it anymore... ~sighs lookin down a little sad and blushes redder than hell
02/24/2012
Contributor: bsgs bsgs
i do sometimes, especially because her number of partners before me was a lot more than mine, and sometimes i get worried that she might not want me anymore, but i just try to put it all out of my mind and think about us
02/25/2012
Contributor: oneeyedoctopus oneeyedoctopus
He hadn't even kissed a girl before he met me. He sometimes gets jealous of my past though. Less now than at the beginning of the relationship.
02/28/2012
Contributor: MissCandyland MissCandyland
I'm just a jealous person. I hate thinking that other girls have kissed him. NOT a turn on.
02/28/2012