As a guy I cringe inwardly (and many times outwardly) when my SO says "it's fine". When I say something is fine I mean it is okay and there is nothing wrong with it. When she says fine, it usually means you are going to be fixing this later and I am going to hold it over you until you do...or sometimes something even worse. Does anyone else experience this? Is it really a man/woman thing? Please vote and discuss...(I left the poll private so as not to set up your own "fine" situation in your own household.
Does fine ever really mean everything is fine?
05/29/2011
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I usually really mean fine, but every now and then I just say it because I don't feel like debating something at the time. I'll also say fine when I'm hormonal and know that it's probably just the hormones saying I'm not actually fine.
05/29/2011
When I say it is fine ,normally I have my hands going and he knows I am pissed off.
05/29/2011
I said "other" because you didn't give me my option.
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean "fine" because it's something that I don't want to argue about or I've processed the information and it either isn't worth the argument or I realized in the "grand scheme" it's not a big deal.
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean "fine" because it's something that I don't want to argue about or I've processed the information and it either isn't worth the argument or I realized in the "grand scheme" it's not a big deal.
05/29/2011
im a man and when i say fine im fine.when the wife says fine hells going to brake out.
05/29/2011
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That's pretty much me too. Most of the time I say something is "fine" it's something that's going to bother me for a little while right then, but isn't worth arguing about and isn't something that's going to be a big deal long term. I try to make a point of taking care of anything that might bother me long term before it has a chance to turn into something we're going to argue about.
Originally posted by
BBW Talks Toys
I said "other" because you didn't give me my option.
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean ... more
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean ... more
I said "other" because you didn't give me my option.
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean "fine" because it's something that I don't want to argue about or I've processed the information and it either isn't worth the argument or I realized in the "grand scheme" it's not a big deal. less
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean "fine" because it's something that I don't want to argue about or I've processed the information and it either isn't worth the argument or I realized in the "grand scheme" it's not a big deal. less
05/29/2011
When I say fine, I mean it. I have found that when most women say fine, it does mean something is wrong and it will be thrown in my face later...
05/29/2011
It depends. Sometimes it really is fine, and sometimes I just don't want to talk about it.
05/29/2011
It all depends on the tone of voice for me, and he knows it. If I sound normal, it really is fine. If I'm mad, I'll say it like I'm mad. He usually doesn't have to do too much guessing on whether I'm angry or not.
05/29/2011
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This is the wife to a T. I am never sure just how 'fine' she means it but I know that it will not last long.
Originally posted by
BBW Talks Toys
I said "other" because you didn't give me my option.
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean ... more
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean ... more
I said "other" because you didn't give me my option.
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean "fine" because it's something that I don't want to argue about or I've processed the information and it either isn't worth the argument or I realized in the "grand scheme" it's not a big deal. less
I'm a woman and when I say "It's fine," it can sometimes mean it's fine, or it can mean trouble. Often times, actually, MOST of the time... I mean "fine" because it's something that I don't want to argue about or I've processed the information and it either isn't worth the argument or I realized in the "grand scheme" it's not a big deal. less
When I say fine, it means just that. I do not play games with words with her and never will.
05/29/2011
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I don't mean it to play games with my words, but I have a short temper and I am learning to bite my tongue before I say stuff I'll regret. The problem always is that Mr likes to push for my reaction. "What do you mean? What are you thinking? Are you mad?" I just say, "It's fine," and I walk away so I can go process what I'm thinking. If I decide that I need to talk about the scenario later, I'll bring it up in a way where I'm *EXPRESSING* my feelings rather than *PROJECTING* them onto him.
Originally posted by
ToyTimeTim
This is the wife to a T. I am never sure just how 'fine' she means it but I know that it will not last long.
When I say fine, it means just that. I do not play games with words with her and never will.
When I say fine, it means just that. I do not play games with words with her and never will.
05/29/2011
I usually say I'm fine when something is upsetting me and I don't want to talk about it right then for whatever reason. I will usually come back to it later and discuss it with them later when I've had some time to think about my feelings.
05/29/2011
I think the cliche is pretty accurate - when I say fine it's because she's asking about my job or something that may not be fine - but it's nothing to do with her. When she says fine - I'm likely in trouble! But it won't be long before we talk it out and everything will really be 'fine'.
05/29/2011
no it means fuck you
05/29/2011
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usually when i say fine, i mean fine or i mean that i either don't want to talk about it or am not ready to.
Originally posted by
Cedarlooman
As a guy I cringe inwardly (and many times outwardly) when my SO says "it's fine". When I say something is fine I mean it is okay and there is nothing wrong with it. When she says fine, it usually means you are going to be fixing this
...
more
As a guy I cringe inwardly (and many times outwardly) when my SO says "it's fine". When I say something is fine I mean it is okay and there is nothing wrong with it. When she says fine, it usually means you are going to be fixing this later and I am going to hold it over you until you do...or sometimes something even worse. Does anyone else experience this? Is it really a man/woman thing? Please vote and discuss...(I left the poll private so as not to set up your own "fine" situation in your own household.
less
05/29/2011
A lot of the time, "fine" doesn't mean fine. I admit I sometimes have a problem talking about my feelings, so sometimes I say "it's fine" when I don't mean it, hoping that with a little time to myself, I will mean it. If that makes sense.
05/30/2011
When my husband says things are fine, they are. When I say it, he assumes things are not fine and then proceeds to pester me about it, until I am pissed. If he'd just give me a minute or ten to think it over logically (without badgering me), I would most likely get over it altogether.
Thanks for bring this question up. We had a nice chat about it and he is going to practice taking my "fine" at face value.
Thanks for bring this question up. We had a nice chat about it and he is going to practice taking my "fine" at face value.
05/30/2011
"Fine" should always be a big red flag lol
05/30/2011
I never say "fine" when I don't mean it. Actually, I'm usually too straightforward about my feelings.
05/30/2011
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THIS... OMG THIS.
Originally posted by
Redboxbaby
When my husband says things are fine, they are. When I say it, he assumes things are not fine and then proceeds to pester me about it, until I am pissed. If he'd just give me a minute or ten to think it over logically (without badgering me), I
...
more
When my husband says things are fine, they are. When I say it, he assumes things are not fine and then proceeds to pester me about it, until I am pissed. If he'd just give me a minute or ten to think it over logically (without badgering me), I would most likely get over it altogether.
Thanks for bring this question up. We had a nice chat about it and he is going to practice taking my "fine" at face value. less
Thanks for bring this question up. We had a nice chat about it and he is going to practice taking my "fine" at face value. less
05/30/2011
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Yup. I am here too. I sometimes say fine meaning I am not fine now but I hope I can get over whatever is bugging me and then it Will be fine. I do not use it as a means of blocking the issue though. If pressed I will tell what is bugging me but my guy knows me well enough to just let me go.
Originally posted by
ZenaidaMacroura
A lot of the time, "fine" doesn't mean fine. I admit I sometimes have a problem talking about my feelings, so sometimes I say "it's fine" when I don't mean it, hoping that with a little time to myself, I will mean it. If that makes sense.
05/30/2011
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Same here.
Originally posted by
MaryExy
I usually really mean fine, but every now and then I just say it because I don't feel like debating something at the time. I'll also say fine when I'm hormonal and know that it's probably just the hormones saying I'm not actually fine.
05/30/2011
When I say it, it usually means "fine". I don't like to play with words like this in an argument. When a person does, they hamper communication and make the situation worse (has the acidic "fine" ever really helped?).
My partner used to do this, until I asked that they not. If there's an issue that they don't want to talk about or would rather talk about later, I've asked that she say just that; "I don't want to talk about it now. I'd rather talk about it more calmly later."
If one partner punishes the other with words, communication is the first thing lost.
My partner used to do this, until I asked that they not. If there's an issue that they don't want to talk about or would rather talk about later, I've asked that she say just that; "I don't want to talk about it now. I'd rather talk about it more calmly later."
If one partner punishes the other with words, communication is the first thing lost.
05/30/2011
when i say "i'm good" usually means it's not good
05/30/2011
"Fine" is usually the last word on an unresolved argument for me.
05/30/2011
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Fine means that I am too tired to have an emotional discussion now.
Originally posted by
Cedarlooman
As a guy I cringe inwardly (and many times outwardly) when my SO says "it's fine". When I say something is fine I mean it is okay and there is nothing wrong with it. When she says fine, it usually means you are going to be fixing this
...
more
As a guy I cringe inwardly (and many times outwardly) when my SO says "it's fine". When I say something is fine I mean it is okay and there is nothing wrong with it. When she says fine, it usually means you are going to be fixing this later and I am going to hold it over you until you do...or sometimes something even worse. Does anyone else experience this? Is it really a man/woman thing? Please vote and discuss...(I left the poll private so as not to set up your own "fine" situation in your own household.
less
05/30/2011
it depends on what it is...im a fairly easy going person and when i say its fine i mean its fine but if somethings happened that really makes me mad then fine means im going to be mad for the rest of the day.
05/30/2011
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Generally it means that it's actually fine...as in it's acceptible but not necessarily preferable. That's where the trouble comes in, it might be fine right now but if the situation changes often my frustration at the original situation will boil over. So my guys get understandably worried when I say something is fine. Now if I say something is "just fine" I am not likely to get really upset if things go wrong.
Originally posted by
Cedarlooman
As a guy I cringe inwardly (and many times outwardly) when my SO says "it's fine". When I say something is fine I mean it is okay and there is nothing wrong with it. When she says fine, it usually means you are going to be fixing this
...
more
As a guy I cringe inwardly (and many times outwardly) when my SO says "it's fine". When I say something is fine I mean it is okay and there is nothing wrong with it. When she says fine, it usually means you are going to be fixing this later and I am going to hold it over you until you do...or sometimes something even worse. Does anyone else experience this? Is it really a man/woman thing? Please vote and discuss...(I left the poll private so as not to set up your own "fine" situation in your own household.
less
05/30/2011
FINE: Fucked up, Insecure, Neurotic and Emotional
Mostly "fine" is different for me and my husband depending on how it is said. If casual and not threatening, it usually means fine. If it is said with a huff or tension in the voice or with a growl, for my partner it means leave him alone, for me it means keep asking cause I need to talk about it and things are not fine
Mostly "fine" is different for me and my husband depending on how it is said. If casual and not threatening, it usually means fine. If it is said with a huff or tension in the voice or with a growl, for my partner it means leave him alone, for me it means keep asking cause I need to talk about it and things are not fine
05/30/2011
Wow...great replies everyone. Good to see I am not alone. And I have seen where she has used it to mean: I want to talk about it later, but why not just say that? LOL
05/30/2011