What does your partner do that bothers you a lot? How do you deal with it?
Peeves about your partner
01/22/2013
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Seriously...do you honestly think there is enough space on the forum to list them all???
Honestly there were a few main ones--a few minor but livable ones and some that were deal breakers. His anger, sarcasm and verbal abuse of me and finally my family were the deal breakers. I dealt with that by getting a lawyer and we are getting a divorce, but also trying counseling. The divorce in non-negotiable, the relationship depends on the outcome of the counseling.
Honestly there were a few main ones--a few minor but livable ones and some that were deal breakers. His anger, sarcasm and verbal abuse of me and finally my family were the deal breakers. I dealt with that by getting a lawyer and we are getting a divorce, but also trying counseling. The divorce in non-negotiable, the relationship depends on the outcome of the counseling.
01/23/2013
Quote:
Chewing with his mouth open is one that comes to mind at the moment. I get really peeved and grit my teeth.
Originally posted by
nova2014
What does your partner do that bothers you a lot? How do you deal with it?
01/23/2013
He's not very tidy, but I don't live with him so it doesn't bother me too much.
His sleep patterns are annoying. When he should sleep, he often isn't tired, meaning that he is usually awake at night but asleep during the day. It's so unpredictable that I often don't know what the best time to contact him is. He can't help it though. He's tried to seek help but nothing has really worked. I'm kind of used to it now.
He does other little things to annoy me, but for the most part he is a good guy. No one is perfect after all.
His sleep patterns are annoying. When he should sleep, he often isn't tired, meaning that he is usually awake at night but asleep during the day. It's so unpredictable that I often don't know what the best time to contact him is. He can't help it though. He's tried to seek help but nothing has really worked. I'm kind of used to it now.
He does other little things to annoy me, but for the most part he is a good guy. No one is perfect after all.
01/23/2013
Never being on time for anything. "Be there at two o'clock." He arrives at four and says "It's still the afternoon, isn't it?" *facepalm*
And the rare times he tries to change my mind on the Child Issue when it's still too soon to be talking of any sort of permanent situations.
And the rare times he tries to change my mind on the Child Issue when it's still too soon to be talking of any sort of permanent situations.
01/23/2013
Quote:
For the most part, we are on the same page about things and he works really hard to change the minute things that bother me. But, that doesn't mean there isn't a short list!
Originally posted by
nova2014
What does your partner do that bothers you a lot? How do you deal with it?
a) He leaves his wet towel on the floor...or the bed...or anywhere but hanging up.
b) He only puts his dishes in the sink every two or three days...(I like them in the sink as soon as they are done being used!)
c) He always leaves stuff on the entry way table. I clean it up. He gets upset because he can't find things. Haha, classic.
d) When he takes the laundry out of the dryer he fails to put it in the basket and always puts it on top of the dryer.
e) We don't have a dishwasher. And when he does dishes, he does NOT do the silverwear...haha
All very small problems that I deal with by simple reminders that they annoy me, and then the habits disappear for a few days. Then repeat process. Haha, if we were talking about bigger issues there is only two things that he does and they have improved exponentially since we got together that includes his money management skills (which are almost 100% solid now) and the way he sometimes has a problem with keeping his mouth shut in situations. That has also improved a lot because we've talked about it at length =)
01/23/2013
Quote:
Haha. The sleep thing happens with my guy too, but in a different way. He's been diagnosed with a sleep disorder before, so he gets kind of paranoid while he's sleeping or if he's about to sleep. The other night I asked him if the door was locked in our apartment, and lately he can't sleep because he's worried someone might hurt me. He watches me half of the night and in the morning he's out. He's fallen asleep at parties and in the middle of the day just because he can't survive on the amount of sleep he gets at night.
Originally posted by
solitudinarian
He's not very tidy, but I don't live with him so it doesn't bother me too much.
His sleep patterns are annoying. When he should sleep, he often isn't tired, meaning that he is usually awake at night but asleep during the day. ... more
His sleep patterns are annoying. When he should sleep, he often isn't tired, meaning that he is usually awake at night but asleep during the day. ... more
He's not very tidy, but I don't live with him so it doesn't bother me too much.
His sleep patterns are annoying. When he should sleep, he often isn't tired, meaning that he is usually awake at night but asleep during the day. It's so unpredictable that I often don't know what the best time to contact him is. He can't help it though. He's tried to seek help but nothing has really worked. I'm kind of used to it now.
He does other little things to annoy me, but for the most part he is a good guy. No one is perfect after all. less
His sleep patterns are annoying. When he should sleep, he often isn't tired, meaning that he is usually awake at night but asleep during the day. It's so unpredictable that I often don't know what the best time to contact him is. He can't help it though. He's tried to seek help but nothing has really worked. I'm kind of used to it now.
He does other little things to annoy me, but for the most part he is a good guy. No one is perfect after all. less
01/23/2013
I hate that he smokes.
02/17/2013
He's a smoker. I don't mind the weed smoking, but the cigarette smoking really bothers me because it's so unhealthy and I don't want him to get cancer or anything like that. Also the way he handles certain political discussions is a bit... childish. But we're gonna try to work on these things, I hope.
02/17/2013
The main problem (which she's working on) is that she reads subtext into things which have no subtext
02/17/2013
Quote:
His need for porn and lack of desire to have sex with me.
Originally posted by
nova2014
What does your partner do that bothers you a lot? How do you deal with it?
03/01/2013
He snores.
And paws at me when I pass him.
And he doesn't do enough with the kids in my opinion.
Ugh. I love him. He pushes my buttons but he makes me laugh. I have some quirks too so it evens out in the end
And paws at me when I pass him.
And he doesn't do enough with the kids in my opinion.
Ugh. I love him. He pushes my buttons but he makes me laugh. I have some quirks too so it evens out in the end
03/09/2013
"At the same time
I wanna hug you
I wanna wrap my hands around your neck
You're an asshole
but I love you
And you make me so mad I ask myself
why I'm still here
Oh, where can I go?
You're the only love I've ever known
But I hate you
I really hate you
So much I think it must be true love"
- Pink, "True Love"
I wanna hug you
I wanna wrap my hands around your neck
You're an asshole
but I love you
And you make me so mad I ask myself
why I'm still here
Oh, where can I go?
You're the only love I've ever known
But I hate you
I really hate you
So much I think it must be true love"
- Pink, "True Love"
03/10/2013
Oh lord here is my list.
1. He only does some of the dishes and will often times leave the cups and silverware left undone.
2. Clothes never seem to make in into the clothes basket. They do arrive on the floor right next to it though.
3. He is messy and extremely lazy when it comes to housework. If I ask him to do something it is considered nagging.
4. He forgets everything. I seriously have to leave him notes to make sure things get paid, something gets picked up etc.
5. Our sex drives are on completely different wave lengths.
6. He seriously expects me to be a mind reader. And gets pissy if I don't "get" something.
7. He is very anti-social and never wants to go out and do anything.
8. He snores
9. Even though there is a family history of heart disease, diabetes, and high blood pressure he refuses to take care of himself, the ending result of which is our sex life is being effected.
And that is just to name a few
Now if y'all are wondering why a person would put up with a person who has many faults there is a simple answer. He is responsible when it comes to work and he treats both me and our son very good. I can overlook the flaws for those simple reasons.
1. He only does some of the dishes and will often times leave the cups and silverware left undone.
2. Clothes never seem to make in into the clothes basket. They do arrive on the floor right next to it though.
3. He is messy and extremely lazy when it comes to housework. If I ask him to do something it is considered nagging.
4. He forgets everything. I seriously have to leave him notes to make sure things get paid, something gets picked up etc.
5. Our sex drives are on completely different wave lengths.
6. He seriously expects me to be a mind reader. And gets pissy if I don't "get" something.
7. He is very anti-social and never wants to go out and do anything.
8. He snores
9. Even though there is a family history of heart disease, diabetes, and high blood pressure he refuses to take care of himself, the ending result of which is our sex life is being effected.
And that is just to name a few
Now if y'all are wondering why a person would put up with a person who has many faults there is a simple answer. He is responsible when it comes to work and he treats both me and our son very good. I can overlook the flaws for those simple reasons.
03/16/2013
"Cleaning the house" = dishes to him. If there are no dishes in the sink, the house is clean. That's because the cleaning fairy (who would be me) does the rest of it. With little recognition, or help.
Video games!
He doesn't take well to any sort of criticism or suggestions, no matter how I phrase them, or approach it (I've tried it all after 8 years) So I have to gear up for a fight or a mopey man anytime I feel I need to talk about something.
He also turns things around. If I say "You have been doing a lot of XYZ lately, could you please try to do it less" (Recently it was forgetting to clean the high chair tray after feeding the baby) and he will always say "Well you do it too" and that somehow negates the fact that it bothers me when he does it all the time, because I did it ONCE
Video games!
He doesn't take well to any sort of criticism or suggestions, no matter how I phrase them, or approach it (I've tried it all after 8 years) So I have to gear up for a fight or a mopey man anytime I feel I need to talk about something.
He also turns things around. If I say "You have been doing a lot of XYZ lately, could you please try to do it less" (Recently it was forgetting to clean the high chair tray after feeding the baby) and he will always say "Well you do it too" and that somehow negates the fact that it bothers me when he does it all the time, because I did it ONCE
03/16/2013
Quote:
Abuse is not a pet peeve. No one (men or women) should put up with abuse. If the other person is unwilling to change then walk. I did and it was the best decision I ever made. I now have a woman who loves me for who I am. She helped me to love myself after years of being torn down by my ex-wife through verbal and physical abuse. I never thought this kind of love was possible. I hope that you can find that too.
Originally posted by
js250
Seriously...do you honestly think there is enough space on the forum to list them all???
Honestly there were a few main ones--a few minor but livable ones and some that were deal breakers. His anger, sarcasm and verbal abuse of me and finally ... more
Honestly there were a few main ones--a few minor but livable ones and some that were deal breakers. His anger, sarcasm and verbal abuse of me and finally ... more
Seriously...do you honestly think there is enough space on the forum to list them all???
Honestly there were a few main ones--a few minor but livable ones and some that were deal breakers. His anger, sarcasm and verbal abuse of me and finally my family were the deal breakers. I dealt with that by getting a lawyer and we are getting a divorce, but also trying counseling. The divorce in non-negotiable, the relationship depends on the outcome of the counseling. less
Honestly there were a few main ones--a few minor but livable ones and some that were deal breakers. His anger, sarcasm and verbal abuse of me and finally my family were the deal breakers. I dealt with that by getting a lawyer and we are getting a divorce, but also trying counseling. The divorce in non-negotiable, the relationship depends on the outcome of the counseling. less
03/16/2013
Total posts: 16
Unique posters: 15