Sorry for the long post and I think this is the right category, or at least you guys may be able to help me, I am not sure who else could.
So here's some backstory: my partner and I have been in a monogamous relationship for over a year now. He knows that my biggest #1 fantasy is a gangbang, and another main fantasy of mine is a threesome with two brothers. He has always been fine watching whatever porn I wanted and is very curious and open-minded about all my kinks and fantasies and he has some of his own I was never into but have come around on (like pegging him, fisting him, bathroom stuff, etc).
For probably about half a year now he has been enthusiastic about roleplaying as other guys with me because he knows it really turns me on to think about playing with different people, and we have no shortage of sex toys, as well as plushies we play with and he encourages me to go to a male strip club with him one of these days.
The other day his brother started getting me really turned on and things didn't escalate very far but we had some amazing sex and have been talking about trying to convince him to have a threesome with us, but since he may not be interested my partner told me to go ahead and look around on craigslist to see what guys might wanna do this with us as long as it was a one-time thing and not someone who would become a part of our life.
He also gets really turned on whenever I am flirting with other guys or coming on to them, and he will even push me into another guy while I am dancing, or make sexual comments about me with other people and he enjoys it.
The reason he doesn't want that attachment if we did it with a friend or even with a random person is because he has been cheated on and doesn't want me (or the other person) to bond in a relationship sense and want to be together, because that often results in someone getting their feelings hurt or leaving their partner, and we don't want that.
Well the problem begins because this is my #1 fantasy, and I could not stop thinking about it, talking about it, etc and I do not have a lot of friends locally so of course the person I could not shut up to was the very person who got un-nerved by hearing about it all of the time.
Now he is saying that he's glad he didn't suggest it to his brother (since he might've said yes) and that he's not okay with me having sex with other people because he doesn't want them to try and make it a regular thing.
What's weird is that he keeps telling me that if we are to travel to a place where prostitution is legal (a part of Nevada or overseas because he has travelled a lot) then he would be okay with us renting a prostitute because then the interpersonal connection aspect isn't there, and it would be just strictly sex, and he is okay with that.
Now I suppose that means he'd be okay with us doing it somewhere closer to home with a non-prostitute if it was kinda spur of the moment and with someone we don't really know so they won't be contacting us and bothering us about it later, but I don't know how to ask him that.
It seems like he is okay with the sex part, but not any risk of a relationship.
Has anyone else experienced this before?
Do you think a threesome is something he would be open to with a regular person if we met a good opportunity?
If he is so okay with having sex with a prostitute if we travelled, is there a way he might feel that comfortable without it being so far from home since we don't travel like that more than maybe once a year or something?
So here's some backstory: my partner and I have been in a monogamous relationship for over a year now. He knows that my biggest #1 fantasy is a gangbang, and another main fantasy of mine is a threesome with two brothers. He has always been fine watching whatever porn I wanted and is very curious and open-minded about all my kinks and fantasies and he has some of his own I was never into but have come around on (like pegging him, fisting him, bathroom stuff, etc).
For probably about half a year now he has been enthusiastic about roleplaying as other guys with me because he knows it really turns me on to think about playing with different people, and we have no shortage of sex toys, as well as plushies we play with and he encourages me to go to a male strip club with him one of these days.
The other day his brother started getting me really turned on and things didn't escalate very far but we had some amazing sex and have been talking about trying to convince him to have a threesome with us, but since he may not be interested my partner told me to go ahead and look around on craigslist to see what guys might wanna do this with us as long as it was a one-time thing and not someone who would become a part of our life.
He also gets really turned on whenever I am flirting with other guys or coming on to them, and he will even push me into another guy while I am dancing, or make sexual comments about me with other people and he enjoys it.
The reason he doesn't want that attachment if we did it with a friend or even with a random person is because he has been cheated on and doesn't want me (or the other person) to bond in a relationship sense and want to be together, because that often results in someone getting their feelings hurt or leaving their partner, and we don't want that.
Well the problem begins because this is my #1 fantasy, and I could not stop thinking about it, talking about it, etc and I do not have a lot of friends locally so of course the person I could not shut up to was the very person who got un-nerved by hearing about it all of the time.
Now he is saying that he's glad he didn't suggest it to his brother (since he might've said yes) and that he's not okay with me having sex with other people because he doesn't want them to try and make it a regular thing.
What's weird is that he keeps telling me that if we are to travel to a place where prostitution is legal (a part of Nevada or overseas because he has travelled a lot) then he would be okay with us renting a prostitute because then the interpersonal connection aspect isn't there, and it would be just strictly sex, and he is okay with that.
Now I suppose that means he'd be okay with us doing it somewhere closer to home with a non-prostitute if it was kinda spur of the moment and with someone we don't really know so they won't be contacting us and bothering us about it later, but I don't know how to ask him that.
It seems like he is okay with the sex part, but not any risk of a relationship.
Has anyone else experienced this before?
Do you think a threesome is something he would be open to with a regular person if we met a good opportunity?
If he is so okay with having sex with a prostitute if we travelled, is there a way he might feel that comfortable without it being so far from home since we don't travel like that more than maybe once a year or something?
