Finding a new open relationship

Contributor: LittleA LittleA
I'm kind of in a newer situation these days, where my long time partner who I had an open relationship with told me a few months ago that he wanted to explore a new relationship, but without me. So this is kind of a two part discussion/question.

First- I know for a fact this new woman does not embrace the lifestyle, and when they were together before, one of the major points of contention leading to their breaking it off was the fact that he wanted to be with more than one woman. I also know that this continues to be the case, and we have been sleeping together, as well as having intimate meetings over the last couple months, including coming by after I have been with someone else. I know that part of that draw for him is being with two women, the problem being is he is not sharing that information with her. (Besides the obvious issues of infidelity and lying I know that may result in that information if comments can stick to the point I'm trying to get to )

Second- I have no desire to get into a 'normal' relationship. I love having the freedom of having my sexual whims being embraced and encouraged. How does one find that again?

I guess my overall concern/question is, once you have been in a sexually free and open relationship, can you ever go back and be in a 'normal' monogamous relationship, especially without eventually letting that other person down? I still have feelings and desires for him, and I'm concerned that he is still struggling with the differences of cheating and swinging, and he is still very much a closet swinger, where I have always been pretty open about my sexuality. Even when I was with him, and since I have a very hard time finding men that are accepting of me being with anyone else. Has anyone successfully gone from one open committed relationship to another? Regardless of whether our futures cross again, I know that both of us deserve to be with someone that likes who we are on all levels, and this is one of those things that isn't as socially acceptable as other things.
03/15/2013
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Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by LittleA
I'm kind of in a newer situation these days, where my long time partner who I had an open relationship with told me a few months ago that he wanted to explore a new relationship, but without me. So this is kind of a two part ... more
Yes, it is possible to go from being open to monogamous but only if the choice is freely made. Doing it to please a lover rarely works and leads to hurt feelings and anger.

You find freedom by pursuing it and honestly looking for it. It's not easy, but you know that. You can move on to another relationship and the next one can be successful. Honest!
03/15/2013
Contributor: earthmama earthmama
Finding the right person for you is always difficult, right? Add any complications and you are likely to find it becomes even more difficult. Some guys reject me because I have a kid. Some people are only attracted to one certain "type" and then all the folks in the world that aren't that "type" get eliminated. All you can do is keep trying! Don't give up. There's got to be a guy that would love to be with a girl in an open relationship around there somewhere.
03/23/2013