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Due to a very out and proud friend who's poly and is also an author who publishes articles all the time on the subject and me reading those articles I have decided that if/when I ever get divorced I will adopt the lifestyle. I agree with her
Due to a very out and proud friend who's poly and is also an author who publishes articles all the time on the subject and me reading those articles I have decided that if/when I ever get divorced I will adopt the lifestyle. I agree with her articles making the point "Why are we no longer allowed to fall in love with anyone else just because we are in love with someone now? How is it we can love all our parents, siblings, children and friends simultaniously but when we love someone intimatly all the sudden we are only capable of loving just one person?
My question is how does one even start a relationship with others as a poly? How does one even break this to someone you just fell in love with? "I love you but just so you know I may also fall in love with someone else too in the future and that doesn't mean I have stopped loving you."
I am assuming that your current relationship is experiencing some difficulties at the present moment and I would caution you not to throw in with the "newest thing" as a remedy to the pain you are in. Obviously I do not know you and I cannot say what is prompting you to decide that the poly lifestyle seems more appealing than your current situation but I believe that the poly lifestyle demands skills that ALL relationships should have such as being able to work through difficulties and make it work.
There are as many ways poly relationships begin as there are ways monogamous relationships begin...we meet in bars, at the laundromat, in the supermarket, online...you get the picture. I would suggest getting to know your local poly community but don't despair if you can't find a whole bunch of people because we tend to be really low key for fear of discrimination.
Your idea may seem a bit out there but really it's not so far from the truth: Let any future lovers know that you acknowledge that while you may never meet anyone that you love as much as you love them...but the possibility is there. I truly believe we should celebrate and look forward to what might come rather than hide behind threats and heartbreak.
I would offer future lovers an open relationship and offer extreme honesty. That's the best way to begin any relationship in my opinion.