I have really been wanting to see if my significant other would be/could be up for the idea of a threesome or foursome. I thought a game or video might help bring up the topic. Does anyone have a game/video suggestion, or any other suggestions.
How should I introduse the idea of a threesome or foursome in the bed room
02/07/2011
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Well firstly trust and communication are huge if this is something you want to do. You need to talk about it. Not play a game and hope that it magically happens.
Are you the jealous type? Is your partner? If either one is, it wont work. I tell people all the time that if there is the slightest jealous hair in ones body you are looking at a one way ticket to divorce land. It can make or break a relationship. I personally know women who have brought another woman in simply to please their man. "That is what he wants, how bad can it be?" It has to be talked about. Sit down and have what I call grown up conversations.
Are you the jealous type? Is your partner? If either one is, it wont work. I tell people all the time that if there is the slightest jealous hair in ones body you are looking at a one way ticket to divorce land. It can make or break a relationship. I personally know women who have brought another woman in simply to please their man. "That is what he wants, how bad can it be?" It has to be talked about. Sit down and have what I call grown up conversations.
02/07/2011
A game or movies isn't a bad way to break the ice, just don't rely on it. You can use it to bring up the topic but be upfront and honest afterwards. And be damned sure you want to take this step -- and are ready for it yourself if he/she agrees whole heartedly.
I don't have any personal movie or game recommendations, though.
I don't have any personal movie or game recommendations, though.
02/07/2011
Quote:
Your best bet is a simple upfront conversation. Trying to introduce the idea through other forms of media can backfire horribly if your partner feels like you are trying to coerce them into the experience. Simply asking what they feel about threesomes and foursomes is the better answer.
Originally posted by
extrafun
I have really been wanting to see if my significant other would be/could be up for the idea of a threesome or foursome. I thought a game or video might help bring up the topic. Does anyone have a game/video suggestion, or any other suggestions.
The kneejerk reaction of most people is to scream 'NO' or to wonder if you are not content in your sex life with them. Be aware and ready for this answer. The way to respond is with loving reassurance that you are just asking and there is no pressure to perform. Ask your partner if it would be ok to explore some movies and stories about threesomes with him/her. Ask if it would be ok if you fantasize together about what a threesome might be like. Ask if he/she would suspend making a firm answer until you have explored the idea together...and then be ready to accept whatever the answer might be.
The key is gentleness and love not pressure and force. It is an AMAZING experience to have sex with more than one person at the same time...it is a soul destroying experience to feel like you were forced into the experience through underhanded tactics.
Be sure that while you are exploring the idea you also explore total monogamy from time to time...by that I mean you watch some movies that are straight one on one sex and that you have lovely times where the subject isn't brought up during sex. Explore ALL sides of the issue and do your research but don't let it become an obsession.
A great way to play is to name a dildo (or pocket pussy) and invite it into the fantasy sessions. Again beware of becoming obsessed, this should be a part of your sexual repetoire not the totality of it.
Look into any of Tristan Taormino's videos and books on the subject as well as Nina Hartley's both ladies are gentle in their approach and firmly grounded in reality. Besides they are HAWT as hell as well.
If the answer is no then be ready with what happens next...if your partner firmly says no then you need to decide if you can live with that. If you decide it's a deal breaker please have the courage to walk away rather than cheat. If the worst happens I suggest starting the next relationship with the understanding that you want to explore non-monogamy in whatever way you feel you need to. That way you won't be bringing an element like this into your relationship later.
02/07/2011
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