Would you be upset if your partner molested you in your sleep?

Contributor: spineyogurt spineyogurt
Or is this normal to think about?
04/13/2012
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Contributor: indiglo indiglo
I wouldn't like it at ALL, but my partner would never do that.

I don't know that it's normal or abnormal to think about it, but I sure wouldn't want him to do it to me.
04/13/2012
Contributor: funluvinmama funluvinmama
yes i would be pissed. All he has to do is wake me up for it.
04/13/2012
Contributor: Annemarie Annemarie
My significant other has actually told me that he might do this to me. It worried me a bit. I told him to wake me up, but that I might fall asleep. He said that he'd still keep going until he finished.

Not sure if this is normal either, but thought I'd share.
04/13/2012
Contributor: Ghost Ghost
I would be upset, but my husband would never do it. :/
04/14/2012
Contributor: DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
The key word here is 'molested,' which implies the action is unwanted, aggressive and abusive--so no. Not okay. If you and your partner have a consenting relationship where being awakened by sexual action is okay, that's cool--but that's not necessarily molestation.

That being said, I'm never okay with a partner touching me in a sexual manner when I'm not awake and fully aware enough to consent to the action--if I haven't specifically given my enthusiastic consent, keep your hands to yourself.
04/14/2012
Contributor: anonkitty anonkitty
I would be annoyed and if it's something that we haven't talked about before, I definitely would be concerned since it would basically be non-consensual. But from what I understand, this isn't an uncommon fantasy.
04/14/2012
Contributor: CindyH CindyH
i would be upset
04/14/2012
Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
Am I the only one who would not have a problem with this? I guess it might be different for me since I explicitly told my husband he is free to touch me whenever, whether I am sleeping or awake.
04/14/2012
Contributor: pootpootpoot pootpootpoot
It would be totally fine with me, but that's because my partner and I discussed this as soon as we began sleeping together regularly, and I gave my consent.
04/14/2012
Contributor: wildorchid wildorchid
I think the word molested is what is throwing me off. My man can touch my while I'm sleeping and can wake me up if he wants. Molesting refers to something non-consensual. To me that implies that this would have had to have been something the couple hadn't talked about before. In that case, yeah I'd probably be a little turned off, but not concerned. But I have talked about it with my partner and we're okay with it.
04/14/2012
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by spineyogurt
Or is this normal to think about?
This is a really great topic. I have heard it discussed somewhere before. I don't think it's abnormal to have this fantasy. Maybe it you were fantasizing about being hurt/raped, it would be a bit off?

However, I think it's something that sounds pretty normal. I would not be upset if he touched me while asleep. However, if he were sneaking around and trying to do things to me WITHOUT waking me up (wanting me to be unconscious while doing it) would really creep me out. I had what I refer to as a "bad experience" in my past, but let's just call it what it is: rape. I was drugged and it nearly killed me and while I was passed out, he started... that's probably the reason why I would freak if my partner did things to me in my sleep.

Now if he just started rubbing me in hopes of waking me up for sex, I'd be fine with that.

He has this fantasy of waking up to me doing him. I've tried making it a reality, but it's pretty darn hard to catch someone in their sleep and have their peter out before they wake up! LOl. So mostly I wait til' he's about to fall asleep and not expecting it and then climb on him. Also, he freaks in his sleep and if I were to actually try unleashing his peter, I might get punched. Lol. He's a strange sleeper, a paranoid sleeper!
04/14/2012
Contributor: Istanbull Istanbull
1. I've done it. She got mad when I woke her up from doing it.

2. She's done it to me and I had no problem.
04/14/2012
Contributor: Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
I'd be fine with it so long as it had been discussed and agreed upon beforehand. The thought's kind of a turn-on, honestly.

But if I hadn't given consent ahead of time, I'd probably be majorly pissed.
04/14/2012
Contributor: Mistress Sassy Mistress Sassy
I actually wouldn't mind being molested in my sleep, especially since my boyfriend and I have talked about this before! We're both in agreement with one another that it's okay to molest the other in their sleep.. And actually I'm rather looking forward to that! I'd love to be woken up in a sexy way, but the only problem is he's a light sleeper and the lightest poke makes is hard to molest him in his sleep!
04/25/2012
Contributor: bobomomo bobomomo
I actually love it (told me that he has done it a few times)
04/25/2012
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
I'll be pissed; but my husband doesn't do that sort of thing.
04/25/2012
Contributor: jennifur77 jennifur77
Quote:
Originally posted by spineyogurt
Or is this normal to think about?
Would be extremely upset about it. Just wake me!
04/28/2012
Contributor: reinkaos reinkaos
I wish she would do it lol
05/10/2012
Contributor: GONE! GONE!
Quote:
Originally posted by wildorchid
I think the word molested is what is throwing me off. My man can touch my while I'm sleeping and can wake me up if he wants. Molesting refers to something non-consensual. To me that implies that this would have had to have been something the ... more
This. I wouldn't want someone to do it if I told them it was not okay to ever do that.
05/10/2012
Contributor: hall5885 hall5885
Someone doing that to me would wake me up and I find it to be a turn on. But then again if I'm already sleeping with the person I trust them and they would already know that I'm ok with that. I wouldn't consider it being molested. Now if I didn't want it and they did it then I would be pissed.
05/10/2012
Contributor: ghalik ghalik
Quote:
Originally posted by DeliciousSurprise
The key word here is 'molested,' which implies the action is unwanted, aggressive and abusive--so no. Not okay. If you and your partner have a consenting relationship where being awakened by sexual action is okay, that's cool--but ... more
Yes, this.
05/10/2012
Contributor: Jake'n'bake Jake'n'bake
No. I actually told my partner that they could do whatever they want while I'm asleep - I've got a kink for getting fucked while I'm out and waking up half-way through it or not waking up at all ( or just a little ) - and then getting told about it later.
05/12/2012
Contributor: gsfanatic gsfanatic
Nope, but we talked about it before, and it's a fun way to be woken up/wake her up.
05/12/2012
Contributor: Femme Mystique Femme Mystique
Quote:
Originally posted by wildorchid
I think the word molested is what is throwing me off. My man can touch my while I'm sleeping and can wake me up if he wants. Molesting refers to something non-consensual. To me that implies that this would have had to have been something the ... more
That's what I was thinking when I read this as well.
05/12/2012
Contributor: butterflygirlxo butterflygirlxo
Quote:
Originally posted by DeliciousSurprise
The key word here is 'molested,' which implies the action is unwanted, aggressive and abusive--so no. Not okay. If you and your partner have a consenting relationship where being awakened by sexual action is okay, that's cool--but ... more
Totally agree! You couldn't have said it better!
05/12/2012
Contributor: vanilla&chocolate vanilla&chocolate
Yes, I personally would be upset.
05/14/2012
Contributor: Dixiemomma Dixiemomma
wouldnt bother me at all .. my body is his so play with at any time, thats a commitment i made, besides theres nothing better than waking up to an orgasm haha
05/14/2012
Contributor: Sex Positivity Sex Positivity
Quote:
Originally posted by DeliciousSurprise
The key word here is 'molested,' which implies the action is unwanted, aggressive and abusive--so no. Not okay. If you and your partner have a consenting relationship where being awakened by sexual action is okay, that's cool--but ... more
You are my new best friend. Perfect answer is perfect.
05/14/2012
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by spineyogurt
Or is this normal to think about?
i would be pissed if ANYONE molested me. that is assault. no matter who it is. if you are not consenting to have sex with someone, it is illegal. not to mention immoral.
05/14/2012