Any Christians here?

Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by DancerLove
Thank you. We are planning to go to a marriage counselor and that would help too. And the other thing is, he isn't a Christian. He's doing better at not doing anything I don't want to do. And it's actually not the spanking, ... more
Anal sex won't ever be pleasurable for you unless you WANT to have it! Your bum won't relax and allow easy, pleasurable penetration if your mind is saying no no no. Have him read some of the excellent guides and articles about anal play and tell him that forcing someone to perform a sex act against their will is rape...even if the person you are forcing is your spouse. You have the right to say no, no matter how much you may have liked anything in the past.
05/07/2011
Contributor: IrishLassie IrishLassie
Quote:
Originally posted by ScottA
I definitely am a Christan, and I think it is important to separate what is clearly articulated in scripture from what is added on. Biblically we are pretty much commanded to enjoy our spouses sexually, and really the only limitations put on it is ... more
Har-har! I completely agree. I am a Christian and agree there arent many limitations. There is more than just waiting, but also keeping the sex between the husband and wife. Now, by no means, Im not bashing other people who have open relationship, but for me and my husband, that is just not something that we practice as it goes against our beliefs.

Again I agree that we should honor our spouses within the relationship. My husband and I are beginning to explore light/medium BDSM play. Since I was the one to bring it up, if my husband was very uncomfortable/against impact and bondage play then certainly we wouldnt pursue it.

God created sex to be good and enjoyable between you and your partner. There is nothing stating that you can only have sex to procreate or can do it in the missionary position. God created sex AND imagination....so get creative! My mom told me before I got married, to not be afraid of sex. Enjoy it often, enjoy different positions AND in different places.

Also the Christian Nymphos blog is a great site.

Rock on ScottA!!
05/08/2011
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by DancerLove
YES!!!!!!! I am a Christian! Since I am still a newlywed, I have NO idea still about what to do for sex. I'm still learning. My husband thinks it's funny that I go on here. I'm glad that he is a good sport. I wanted to know though if any ... more
As P'Gell said, masturbation is not a sin. Very true what she says about the sin of Onan. I've studied that part myself.

Also, the sin of Sodom was not that the soldiers were having sex with men, it's that they were raping men.

It's funny how so many of these "GREAT SINS" have been turned into a platform for fear mongering. As if God would love you any less if you are masturbating or gay.
05/09/2011
Contributor: cherryredhead88 cherryredhead88
I don't discuss religion publicly (rarely if I do) but I personally feel like if you like something, it's OK

Then again this can get into some deep discussion, so I'll just say that and keep my mouth shut! LOL
05/10/2011
Contributor: Hallmar82 Hallmar82
Yes, I am a Christian, and it does not affect my sex life...with my wife, that is. Although sometimes taken out of context, "to the pure, all things are pure" (Titus 1:15) is a good verse to remember. If what you and your spouse are doing is in the context of a loving marriage, then nothing you do together should bother either of you. Obviously, if he isn't loving you and you aren't respecting him simultaneously, then you have to ask each other whether or not you're actually keeping to the Great Commandment. If you believe you are, then you have nothing to worry about and should enjoy "knowing" each other!
05/10/2011
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by Redboxbaby
I am a Christian. I believe God gave my husband and I to each other for each others pleasure and companionship. I believe whatever we do sexually, within the confines of our marriage, is perfectly acceptable and blessed, kinky or not. The Bible ... more
Wow. I've heard so much about oral sex being so BAD BAD BAD! Being a Christian, it's very easy to be "bashed" for doing anything that sounds unperfect, but you are right.

The bible clearly talks about sex. It says that when a man and a woman marry, they are supposed to meet each other's sexual needs just as well as their material, emotional, etc. It doesn't say it in those words of course. & When it says you should meet those needs, it does not mean if your husband asks for sex and you're in pain or are not in the mood that you HAVE to. I hope I didn't make it sound that way. It also doesn't mean you ever HAVE to have sex if you do not want to. It doesn't mean you have to perform every sexual act your partner asks of you. If you are uncomfortable with it then you don't have to. It just means you are sexual beings and are meant to have sex and please each other.

Also, RedBoxBaby, I've heard people say very negative things such as you will surely go to hell if you have oral sex and that God did not mean for oral sex to ever happen. Ireally do not believe that & have searched through the bible to find anything along the lines of it, but must have missed something. I honeslty believe that oral sex was meant to be a part of sex if you and your partner choose for it to be. I mean, the clitoris does not serve any other purpose that I'm aware of. I always thought it was not a sin to have oral sex. My question is, by any chance do you remember where at in the bible it talks about it? Don't go out of your way to figure it out if you can't remember, I was just interested because so many people tell me it's bad. I would like to be able to find something about it in the bible so maybe I could point it out to people.

If you can help me out there, I'd love that
05/10/2011
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
I used to call myself Christian.
Cancer took my spouse along with my faith.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not against anybody else having faith. I just don't have it anymore, myself.
I'm so sorry to hear that My grandfather passed away 2 years ago from cancer. My grandmother was left behind on her own now. It's so sad. She has somehow kept a little faith in God. I can understand how that could mess with you and make you see things differently. I can't say I wouldn't be angry with God if my partner was taken from me.
05/10/2011
Contributor: K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by DancerLove
YES!!!!!!! I am a Christian! Since I am still a newlywed, I have NO idea still about what to do for sex. I'm still learning. My husband thinks it's funny that I go on here. I'm glad that he is a good sport. I wanted to know though if any ... more
I've wondered that before, but I honestly don't think they are bad in God's eyes. Don't take my word for it though because I don't have back up. I haven't read about it in the bible, but I do think it's OK as long as you're not harming yourself or others. Lol.

I think sometimes we worry ourselves too much about sex. I mean not that we should not worry about sex consequences, but God made us to have sex with our partners. I don't think he'd think badly of us for the sexual act between a man and married woman as long as both are comfortable with what they're doing.
05/10/2011
Contributor: ToyGurl ToyGurl
My fiance and I are Christian. I have used sex toys since age 17. I never saw masturbation as a sin because I have had many stressful conditions since I was a teen. Masturbation was always a way to relax. I never thought about anything really nasty, and often didn't fantasize at all about anything. If I did, and this may sound silly, I thought about my future husband. Generating a random face for my fantasy. I masturbated to the thought of being married, just as God wanted me to.

I don't wish to preach fait on masturbation to anyone. I may not be right, although that is what I believe. Christians should do what they know in their hearts are right and avoid what they think is wrong. No doubt about that. I think that masturbation is okay as long as it isn't pulling you from God.

My fiance and I are sexually active. Neither of us actually think that us sleeping together before marriage is right in the eyes of God. Half of us think that it's okay since we're practically married, getting married in 4 months. But we're aware that the Christian church doesn't find it okay.

I honestly don't know what sex toys and masturbation are in the eyes of God. I don't find them very sinful. I work with planned parenthood and women's health centers in my area to inform girls about masturbation in hopes to lower the rates of abortion and unsafe sex practices. We get the questions all the time from girls and guys about masturbation. I am always afraid to open my mouth, but I'm the only one of us who is Christian... so I just tell the girls to think before they do anything. I remind them that sex before marriage is definitely a sin as far as the bible is concerned. Masturbation isn't technically mentioned, so that's one thing to think about. I think it really is what masturbation means to you. Is it lustful to you? What are you thinking about while masturbating? Etc.

Inside of marriage I definitely see masturbation, sex, and sex toys completely okay. No doubt about that. You're using these things with your partner to spice up the love life. Nothing wrong with that. Great post.
05/10/2011
Contributor: ToyGurl ToyGurl
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Right. Onan's only sin was refusing to impregnate his dead brother's wife, when the child would be considered his brother's child, not his. He wasn't masturbating and it wasn't the use of "birth control" (spilling his ... more
I hear this Onanism crap all the time as well at the Planned Parenthood center. I do a counselor type meeting with kids two days a week and they basically drop their questions on me. Religion comes up a lot, and they all mention this story. Onan was NOT masturbating, and was not using birth control. He simply changed his mind... Thanks for letting people know because I didn't think of mentioning this.

I think the church is corrupt in some ways to use stories like this to basically "Taboo" something that seems wrong. Masturbation and birth control isn't in the bible, so they pick a story that seems like it relates and connect the two. But this one is far from even relating...
05/10/2011
Contributor: ToyGurl ToyGurl
Quote:
Originally posted by DancerLove
Thank you. We are planning to go to a marriage counselor and that would help too. And the other thing is, he isn't a Christian. He's doing better at not doing anything I don't want to do. And it's actually not the spanking, ... more
I hope everything works out. It's really hard being in a mixed relationship. In high school I dated a boy for 3 years who was an athiest. He became a part of my life regardless of his beliefs. He was like this. He used to hit me. It wasn't always painful, but forceful. He grabbed me. Enjoyed spanking extremely hard in bed, and forced anal as well. I had bleeding and bruises all the time. I didn't even want to have sex but he would coax me into it. I have been raped and molested by two people in my life, and what he did only brought those memories back. He would use the rape against me. He said "You can't have sex with your boyfriend? You're already dirty because you've been raped, and you wont have sex with someone willing to still love you?" He had a bad home life and I'm sure that contributed to it, but it's never a reason to put up with someone doing things you don't like. That's actually a form of sexual violence, or rape, if you will that we talk about at our women's center in san antonio. Not all people see it like this, but it is. Definitely something you need to address.

I met my fiance after breaking up with the old boyfriend. My fiance urged me to see a therapist for the longest time and I didn't until I was 19. Really opened my eyes to see that I was being abused and basically raped. The statistics are scary because less than a fifth of the men grow out of these control issues, especially without therapy. And the therapy needs to be a long term thing. It has nothing to do with religion, and everything to do with the way they were raised and the way their minds work.

Consider attending a marriage seminar - it will seem less provoking. They often offer them at churches, hotels, etc. The cool part is they go to vacation spots and nice hotels. Makes it more inviting. You can meet other couples like you. I think you would benefit greatly. God bless and I hope things work out.
05/10/2011
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by K101
Wow. I've heard so much about oral sex being so BAD BAD BAD! Being a Christian, it's very easy to be "bashed" for doing anything that sounds unperfect, but you are right.

The bible clearly talks about sex. It says that when ... more
(not expressing personal beliefs for or against ANYTHING, just my observations from what I've read...)

A lot of what is talked about sexually in the Bible is discussed in the Song of Solomon (or Song of Songs). It's very poetic and there's a lot of metaphors used. But there's definitely oral sex involved. There's a REALLY erotic verse (there's lots but here are a couple... and this is all in the Contemporary English Version, which is super easy to read):

SoS 7:13
Perfume from the magic flower fills the air, my darling.
Right at our doorstep
I have stored up for you
all kinds of tasty fruits.

(I only have one "magic flower" whose perfume fills the air)

There's also SoS 5:1
My bride, my very own,
I come to my garden
and enjoy its spices.
I eat my honeycomb and honey;
I drink my wine and milk.
Eat and drink
until you are drunk with love.

In other words, in the poetic books (Psalms, SoS, Ecclesiastes, Lamentations, etc.) you have to find the meaning in the metaphors. Versions of the Bible, such as the Contemporary English Version or The Message can break it down to everyday English.

now, for my opinion:
The Church (collective) likes to put a lot of hate and fear into their messages about masturbation, oral sex, anal sex, homosexuality. It's disconcerting how skewed it all is and it makes me question, on a weekly basis. We still go to church, and I even enjoy my church a lot, but I still don't agree with everything they say. BUT it's much better than the last church I went to that preached lots of law and very little grace.
05/10/2011
Contributor: Maeby Maeby
I agree that sexual activity between married partners is a gift. Sex is a physical expression of love, and it's my belief that that's what Christianity is fundamentally about--love in its many different forms. Sometimes, my husband and I like to express our love for each other in a rough or kinky way, but I just don't believe God would banish us to an eternity of weeping and gnashing our teeth because I like to get my hair pulled once in a while. As long as your sexual activity is consensual and doesn't involve other people, I think it's a blessing.

I also believe that masturbation and sex toys are okay. Others have stated it well, so I don't feel the need to rehash.

What I wonder is how people feel about the content of fantasies. I stumbled across a Christian blog or something a while back that stated it was okay to fantasize about ONLY your spouse in different situations, as long as you were married in your fantasy. Honestly, I kind of chuckled at that, especially as the example had something to do with pirates (because, you know, before the pirate beds his wench, they have to hold a quickie wedding). Is it enough to control what you do with your body, or do you also have to quash your fantasies for being too lustful?
05/10/2011
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
Quote:
Originally posted by Maeby
I agree that sexual activity between married partners is a gift. Sex is a physical expression of love, and it's my belief that that's what Christianity is fundamentally about--love in its many different forms. Sometimes, my husband and I ... more
One book I read talked about having sexy talk with your spouse. The example they used was calling his parts the "Lighthouse on the rocks." So this sparked Mr and I to start making jokes. It was just so ridiculous. Our favorite was:

I want to feel my waves crashing against the rocks of your lighthouse!

To this day it's a joke between us!
05/10/2011
Contributor: Maeby Maeby
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
(not expressing personal beliefs for or against ANYTHING, just my observations from what I've read...)

A lot of what is talked about sexually in the Bible is discussed in the Song of Solomon (or Song of Songs). It's very poetic and ... more
"The Church (collective) likes to put a lot of hate and fear into their messages about masturbation, oral sex, anal sex, homosexuality."

I agree, and so many people see Christianity as a message of hatred for and prejudice against anyone who doesn't conform to a narrow interpretation of the Scripture. I am blessed that the churches I have been a part of preach that God is love, and the most important duty of a Christian is to strive to reflect that love in how you approach your life and the people in it. In my opinion, judging others' consensual sexual practices is not loving. Telling people they're going to hell because they disagree with you is not loving, and it's not likely to win anyone over.
05/10/2011
Contributor: Maeby Maeby
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
One book I read talked about having sexy talk with your spouse. The example they used was calling his parts the "Lighthouse on the rocks." So this sparked Mr and I to start making jokes. It was just so ridiculous. Our favorite ... more
LOL

That reminds me of our favorite line from a romance novel: "He impaled her on the glistening shaft of his manhood." How romantic.

Although that would be a great name for a dildo: "The Impaler"
05/10/2011
Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Quote:
Originally posted by K101
Wow. I've heard so much about oral sex being so BAD BAD BAD! Being a Christian, it's very easy to be "bashed" for doing anything that sounds unperfect, but you are right.

The bible clearly talks about sex. It says that when ... more
Song of Solomon! I will go home and look for the exact verses for you, but yes, it is there! The entire thing is beautiful to read. I highly recommend it.
05/10/2011
Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
(not expressing personal beliefs for or against ANYTHING, just my observations from what I've read...)

A lot of what is talked about sexually in the Bible is discussed in the Song of Solomon (or Song of Songs). It's very poetic and ... more
Oh yep, I should always read a few more posts before I make mine! Thanks for being specific for her!
05/10/2011
Contributor: IrishLassie IrishLassie
There are some bad seeds within christianity but Let's not forget the people who are christians whoe are genuinely loving, caring and striving to be more christ-like. Its therse bad seeds that are giving the others a bad name. Sadly though its going to happen with any religion. Its the squeaky wheel that gets the most attention and it makes me sad. Not angry just sad. But it gives me a chance to show the world that not ALL christians are like thAt, thaT there are people who genuinely love and care about others

my mom taught about sex. And as I mentioned earlier she taught me to have sex oftern, do it different positions and don't limit to the bedroom she taught me that its ok a good to explore each other. She is a good solid christian woman whom I admire. But that's what she taught me. Sex it to an enjoyment and an expression of love between two people and not a chore.

Someone mentioned about fantasizing. It is perfectly natural and normal. That being said in my opinion its only problem when you start actively pursuing it and it falls outside of the confies of marriage (whether its being dispectful of your spouse or taken literally). Other than that fantsize away. I don't see anything wrong with toys, oral, or anal. Sex is meant and created to be enjoyed by two people within the marriage. I don't care what you do with your spouse. Do you two enjoy and love each? Then great that's all that matters.

Ps. My orignal post was better but my phone erased it. Sorry.
05/10/2011
Contributor: Shaelote Shaelote
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
I was raised Catholic, and although I don't really like what they have made up to scare people about sex, I do like what that Jewish Carpenter had to say! He was a smart guy and seemed to be a really nice guy.

I have my faith and I ... more
The last part of your post?

The BEST. THING. I. HAVE. EVER. READ.

Just wanted to say that.

Also - now I keep envisioning God and Voldemort together, because you said You Know Who
05/10/2011
Contributor: liilii080 liilii080
I was born and raised Catholic. I have strayed a little from he faith but am definitely Christian. That said, I don't think God sees enjoying sex and play how you like it to be a sin. Life is too short to get caught up in the crazy rule books.
05/10/2011
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
I am a Christian and kinky, queer and all kinds of other stuff. I, too, believe my God is a one of pride and joy, not shame and misery. As long as the sex is consensual and sane then I think it's perfectly in line with my faith.
05/10/2011
Contributor: virgomama616 virgomama616
I am christian. I believe that when youre in a loving committed relationship, and both parties involved are comfotable, anything goes. Sex is something that should bring you closer, in ways that nothing else can, and you should both be happy in the end I think there is a stigma of shame relating to sex and religion that we as a society need to break free from.
08/10/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Shaelote
The last part of your post?

The BEST. THING. I. HAVE. EVER. READ.

Just wanted to say that.

Also - now I keep envisioning God and Voldemort together, because you said You Know Who
Thank you.

I didn't mean to compare G*d and Voldemort. I often follow the Jewish tradition of not writing the name of G*d, so I just said "you know who" because the rest of the post was funny. I didn't mean a comparison. Volde was a bad bad man.
08/10/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Shaelote
The last part of your post?

The BEST. THING. I. HAVE. EVER. READ.

Just wanted to say that.

Also - now I keep envisioning God and Voldemort together, because you said You Know Who
Thank you.

I didn't mean to compare G*d and Voldemort. I often follow the Jewish tradition of not writing the name of G*d, so I just said "you know who" because the rest of the post was funny. I didn't mean a comparison. Volde was a bad bad man, he and the Guy Upstairs were not meant to be compared.
08/10/2011
Contributor: OhioJoe OhioJoe
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
I was raised Catholic, and although I don't really like what they have made up to scare people about sex, I do like what that Jewish Carpenter had to say! He was a smart guy and seemed to be a really nice guy.

I have my faith and I ... more
Well said from another that was raised Catholic.
08/12/2011
Contributor: OhioJoe OhioJoe
Quote:
Originally posted by kfdarling1375
I am a Christian and was wondering if there are others here at Eden? I ask because I kind of struggle with what would be considered "normal" sexual desires with my faith. What are your thoughts? This is a post to bash anyone's faith.
I am Christain and I enjoy sex immensely as God designed us to be imaginative and pleasureful.
08/12/2011
Contributor: tooshy tooshy
I'm Christian and I've struggled with sex and pleasure in marriage. My past was very different from my present and some things I used to do, I won't do now. What turned things around for me is "then marriage bed is undefiled." I don't have the scripture reference, but when I let go of all the shouldn't's from my past and let God be in charge of what is ok within our bedroom, then I could relax and really enjoys sex.
08/29/2011
Contributor: OhioJoe OhioJoe
Allowing God to be in charge fress us to enjoy living our lives in Him as we enjoy each and every day. God Bless!
08/30/2011
Contributor: Illumin8 Illumin8
Quote:
Originally posted by Redboxbaby
I am a Christian. I believe God gave my husband and I to each other for each others pleasure and companionship. I believe whatever we do sexually, within the confines of our marriage, is perfectly acceptable and blessed, kinky or not. The Bible ... more
Very well said. I'm a Christian as well, and I completely agree.
09/07/2011