I have been "curious" and want my husband and I to have a 3-some with another woman. He was reluctant at first but has finally agreed that if I set it up he will go along with it. We have been in a monogamous relationship for 5 years and I don't want this to ruin anything...Any advice?
Should my husband & I have a 3-some with another woman?
01/22/2011
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how do you think having a 3-some will effect your marriage?
01/24/2011
Do NOT do it if you are not both completely comfortable with it before hand. Continue to talk to each other about every little thing that could go wrong, that either of you is worried about. Talk it to death. If you are not both completely comfortable by then, it probably isn't a good idea.
01/24/2011
Quote:
I agree with this 100%. A 3-some can bring some excitement to a marriage, but it has also ruined others.
Originally posted by
Emma (Girl With Fire)
Do NOT do it if you are not both completely comfortable with it before hand. Continue to talk to each other about every little thing that could go wrong, that either of you is worried about. Talk it to death. If you are not both completely
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Do NOT do it if you are not both completely comfortable with it before hand. Continue to talk to each other about every little thing that could go wrong, that either of you is worried about. Talk it to death. If you are not both completely comfortable by then, it probably isn't a good idea.
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If you only want it to be a one time thing, I would look for somebody that neither of you know and won't be lingering around at all afterwards.
01/25/2011
If you have to ask, the answer is probably no.
"Should" is subjective. The use of the words "gave in" worry me the most. It will change your relationship and the maturity of everyone involved is what will set the tone and the consequences for the choice. You have to set boundaries.
My partner and I talk about threesomes all of the time and I think right now we aren't willing to pull the trigger because of the law of unintended consequences. We just don't know for sure what will happen. We have had threesomes before and they were disasterous but it had everything to do with the third person we chose and not necessarily our relationship itself. If that makes sense.
I suggest reading The Ethical Slut and really talking about it thoroughly with your partner. Set boundaries and code words that let each other know you are feeling uncomfortable with something going on and both people should have the freedom to say "STOP" without fear of an argument or hurt feelings.
"Should" is subjective. The use of the words "gave in" worry me the most. It will change your relationship and the maturity of everyone involved is what will set the tone and the consequences for the choice. You have to set boundaries.
My partner and I talk about threesomes all of the time and I think right now we aren't willing to pull the trigger because of the law of unintended consequences. We just don't know for sure what will happen. We have had threesomes before and they were disasterous but it had everything to do with the third person we chose and not necessarily our relationship itself. If that makes sense.
I suggest reading The Ethical Slut and really talking about it thoroughly with your partner. Set boundaries and code words that let each other know you are feeling uncomfortable with something going on and both people should have the freedom to say "STOP" without fear of an argument or hurt feelings.
01/25/2011
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I also agree, I am not married but have been involved in a 3-some with a g/f of mine. Certain aspects have been good but many, many more negatives for everyone.
Originally posted by
Jul!a
I agree with this 100%. A 3-some can bring some excitement to a marriage, but it has also ruined others.
If you only want it to be a one time thing, I would look for somebody that neither of you know and won't be lingering around at all ... more
If you only want it to be a one time thing, I would look for somebody that neither of you know and won't be lingering around at all ... more
I agree with this 100%. A 3-some can bring some excitement to a marriage, but it has also ruined others.
If you only want it to be a one time thing, I would look for somebody that neither of you know and won't be lingering around at all afterwards. less
If you only want it to be a one time thing, I would look for somebody that neither of you know and won't be lingering around at all afterwards. less
The emotional issues alone can be overwhelming for all.
01/25/2011
Total posts: 6
Unique posters: 6