Stop saying poor quality toys might be okay for beginners!

Stop saying poor quality toys might be okay for beginners!

Silverdrop Silverdrop
I have been reading a lot of reviews lately, and I keep seeing this over and over again. People rate a toy two or three stars and then say 'I would only recommend this for beginners'.

Why - WHY?! would you recommend a poor quality sex toy to a beginner? Do beginners not deserve good toys? Do you think they should have poor toys foisted off on them because they won't know any better? Someone who is brand new to sex toys should be pointed towards a 5 star winner, so they won't be disappointed! There are high quality, highly reviewed toys in every category and at any price point. There is absolutely no reason to say a beginner should start with a rubbish toy, and any reviewer who says so should be slapped with a wet dildo.

I can't personally comment on every review that does this, so I hope the reviewer and mentor community will help out here. If you've been guilty of this practice, knock it off! Whether you have or not, guiding other reviewers when you catch it happening, or your students if you're a mentor, will help everyone, particularly the sex toy newbies who are reading our reviews and trying to decide what to purchase.

(Okay, rant over. But I really needed to get that off my chest.)
09/13/2011
  • Buy 3 Items for $70
  • Buy 3 Items for $50
  • Buy 3 Items for $30
  • Buy 3 Items for $20
  • Save 20% on Luxury Toys
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
sktb0007 sktb0007
Quote:
Originally posted by Silverdrop
I have been reading a lot of reviews lately, and I keep seeing this over and over again. People rate a toy two or three stars and then say 'I would only recommend this for beginners'.

Why - WHY?! would you recommend a poor quality sex ...
I mentioned this in my recent review... not sure if you had read it and referring to mine but I am a new toy user and I said this product was great for me and would be great for beginners like myself. I also stated that those who are more advanced may not find it as mind blowing, but would be a great addition to their collection.

I personally do not see anything wrong with this and would not change it. As a new toy user, I have no idea what advanced toy users are looking for, but I assume that there are products that would be considered "higher end" to the product I tried. I think new toy users (or at least, for myself anyways) would prefer trying the less expensive items first, and see what types of textures, styles, etc that they like before committing to a $100+ purchase of a vibrator/dildo/rabbit/ etc.

Just my two cents though of course.
09/13/2011
Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
I think many things need to be taken into consideration when reading reviews.

For example...

I've tried a lot - holy shit, a LOT - of toys. So many that I'm pretty much a toy snob at this point and only bother with my favorites. So, should I be handed a $12.99 plastic bullet, I'd probably turn up my nose a bit and rate it at around a 2 or 3 stars -- because, in my experience, it's not on par with my 5 star toys.

Does that means it's sub par or bad for everyone? Of course not. Someone who is newer to toys may think it's the bees knees.

It's all subjective is what it comes down to.

The $10 rubber dong that used to please me (oh, did it please me, right down to my fetish for the smell of rubber) no longer does. That doesn't mean it won't please someone as it did me those many moons ago. My tastes have simply changed and grown but I see nothing wrong with recommending such products to those who are new, who aren't comparing to the Eleven or a hand made Nobessence piece.




Now if something doesn't work at all, is defective or glitchy or just plain horrible, it probably shouldn't be recommended for anyone but....

Really? Lots of beginners want the low cost item they can use and abuse and throw away and learn from without investing the kitchen sink. Nothing wrong with recommending those types of toys -- especially since we have so many choices for them. Regardless of recommendations, they make their own choices, right?

I can't count the number of times I tried to recommend a really great quality toy to a blogger who was new only to be refused cuz they really, really, really wanted that jelly rabbit!
09/13/2011
Dawn (Lilac Distraction) Dawn (Lilac Distraction)
Usually, items with cheaper price tags (aka lower quality) are suggested for beginners who haven't tried that type of thing before and want to experiment. How do you know if you like ____ stimulation if you haven't tried it? What if you don't like it and ended up buying a super expensive toy?

The rest of us are just way too spoiled.
09/13/2011
sktb0007 sktb0007
Quote:
Originally posted by Dawn (Lilac Distraction)
Usually, items with cheaper price tags (aka lower quality) are suggested for beginners who haven't tried that type of thing before and want to experiment. How do you know if you like ____ stimulation if you haven't tried it? What if you ...
That is how I feel too.. My recent review was on a nubby textured toy.. My first ever nubby textured toy and it was also bendable! First bendable too! I would never pay $100 for a high end product if I have't tried out the different styles first (texture, size, material, vibration, etc etc) so like you said, it's our (the newbs) way of finding out what we like : )
09/13/2011
mandiegk mandiegk
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
I think many things need to be taken into consideration when reading reviews.

For example...

I've tried a lot - holy shit, a LOT - of toys. So many that I'm pretty much a toy snob at this point and only bother with my ...
This is exactly what I was going to say. I only started using toys about 5 months ago and I wanted to start with cheaper things just to get a feel for them and see what I liked - and a lot of those first toys were amazing for me as a beginner. Now I'm buying better and more expensive items and those toys that were so fantastic just a few months ago are now collecting dust at the bottom of my storage box. I don't regret buying them and I don't think they were a waste of money because they got me interested in buying better toys. Some of the things people absolutely love would have scarred me for life if they were my first toy and I definitely wouldn't be here right now.

I also didn't start reviewing right away so I am reviewing my first toys now after having experience with a lot more toys. So now when I rate them I give them three stars, but when I was using them I definitely would have given them 5 stars because I thought they were the greatest things in the world. So when I write my review I am going to recommend them to beginners because as a beginner I loved them - not because the toy is absolutely terrible.
09/13/2011
sktb0007 sktb0007
Quote:
Originally posted by mandiegk
This is exactly what I was going to say. I only started using toys about 5 months ago and I wanted to start with cheaper things just to get a feel for them and see what I liked - and a lot of those first toys were amazing for me as a beginner. Now ...
I'm glad you'll recommend them to beginners still because I personally look for that in reviews since I am newer to insertable toys... If I am interested in a product and read a review that doesnt mention it, I usually say, "so would you suggest this to someone who doesn't have much experience with toys?" Luckily though, a lot of people mention if it would be good for beginners. I also like that people put that in the BDSM toy reviews too because I wouldn't want to be overwhelmed!
09/13/2011
-BillD -BillD
I agree in that all toy users should buy safe materials, but I see where people are coming from in terms of high end toys. My first 12 or so toys were all basic Tantus plugs and dildos, as they are great quality but pretty inexpensive. Then I got into expensive vibrators along with glass and steel once I found what I liked.
09/13/2011
Coralbell Coralbell
I agree that less expensive things are good for many beginners so they can figure out what they like. But not all beginners want cheap toys. I spent $70 on my first because I wanted to make sure I got something good.

I also hate when I see low quality toys recommended to beginners. There are things that you can get for a reasonable price that still work well and are made from safe materials.

Also, I often see reviews for vibrators with 1 or 2 vrooms recommending them for beginners. Just because someone has never used a vibrator before doesn't mean it will be easy for them to orgasm with a weak one. I know when I first started I still needed strong toys.

I think it's best to suggest strong vibrators with multiple speeds to beginners. That way they'll be able to try out several strengths and see what they like, and if they do end up needing a lot of power it will be available.

When I review a weaker toy I say it's best for people who already know they don't need strong vibes. If you don't already know it will be enough, then why take the risk?
09/13/2011
P'Gell P'Gell
Not all inexpensive toys are poor quality (I have an amazing bullet that was very inexpensive) and not all poorly made toys are inexpensive, but I see what the OP was saying.

There sometimes seems to be a "this toy is crap, it might be good for "Beginners." Even if it's a toy that the reviewer hated, it smelled and fell apart after one use. This bothered me, too. I wrote an article on changing ideas about what a "beginner" is and what "beginner toys" actually are. Carrie Ann helped with the graphics and set up, and I think you'd like it, Silverdrop.
09/13/2011
Silverdrop Silverdrop
Sktb, if you mean the Nubby Softee review, I just read it, and it looks good. You had fun with it, only found one issue with its construction, and gave it four stars. If it's a toy that you use yourself, then recommending it to anyone else, beginner or otherwise, is certainly ethically sound.

It's the reviewers who rate a toy 2 or 3 stars, find quality or performance issues with it, and didn't actually find it enjoyable, who need to stop recommending those toys to beginners.

If you're a toy snob who can't give an objective review to a non-luxury toy, then you shouldn't be reviewing them, imho. There's a difference between saying 'This is a nicely made toy that does x and y but it didn't really work for me' and saying 'This toy broke on the first use, but it might be okay for beginners'. I only wish that was an exaggeration, but I read a review that said that only yesterday!

There's a difference between a 'low end' toy (under $30) and a poor quality toy (under 3 stars). You don't need to spend $100 on a luxury vibe to get a quality toy that gives good orgasm, and there are plenty of toys for under $20 which average 4 stars and above.

If the toy is poor quality, you know it, whether or not it gives you an orgasm. Do the batteries fall out of the case when you look at it wrong? Are there sharp seams on the plastic? Does your hand vibrate more than your clit does? Does it take 4 batteries without giving 4 batteries worth of vroom? These are the toys that no one should be recommending to beginners, no matter how cheap they are!
09/13/2011
Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Quote:
Originally posted by sktb0007
I mentioned this in my recent review... not sure if you had read it and referring to mine but I am a new toy user and I said this product was great for me and would be great for beginners like myself. I also stated that those who are more advanced ...
I think new toy users (or at least, for myself anyways) would prefer trying the less expensive items first, and see what types of textures, styles, etc that they like before committing to a $100+ purchase of a vibrator/dildo/rabbit/ etc.

This.

I know, for many new to the toy world, the thought of dropping $100 on a toy (which I seem to do on a regular basis) is absurd. I would not recommend it either if you are not absolutely sure of what you like and don't like.

We may be a different breed though; we hate spending more than we need to, and finding out after the fact that a texture or material absolutely does not work for us.

I would never recommend the Pure Plug Large to a beginner new to anal play, nor the Pure Wand for those new to P-spot or G-spot play, even though both of them are, in my mind, the end-all-be-all. Steel is an unforgiving material and if you aren't sure of what you are doing, you can seriously injure yourself! And to drop $100+ on the Wand to only figure out later on that you do not like G-spot stimulation and are not up for anal play is a waste of money and a fantastic toy.
09/13/2011
P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Not all inexpensive toys are poor quality (I have an amazing bullet that was very inexpensive) and not all poorly made toys are inexpensive, but I see what the OP was saying.

There sometimes seems to be a "this toy is crap, it might be ...
OOOP, I forgot the link, if you're interested.

Article on Changing What We Think About Beginner Toys
09/13/2011
sktb0007 sktb0007
Quote:
Originally posted by Silverdrop
Sktb, if you mean the Nubby Softee review, I just read it, and it looks good. You had fun with it, only found one issue with its construction, and gave it four stars. If it's a toy that you use yourself, then recommending it to anyone else, ...
Ohhh! Okay, I misunderstood what you meant in your original post then. I agree that if a toy is sht, then it shouldn't be recommended to anyone. Like CarrieAnn said about defects, etc. If a toy breaks after one use, I don't see how that would be good for a beginner lol... I had never seen any reviews like that though before .. that's very odd!
09/13/2011
Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
OOOP, I forgot the link, if you're interested.

Article on Changing What We Think About Beginner Toys
I love that article!
09/13/2011
Rossie Rossie
When beginners inquire about toys, I always suggest getting the high quality items that will give them good results. I know good quality toys cost more, but people will get what they paid for, rather than buying something cheap and regret it. Of course there are those who do not want to spend too much on their first toys, then it's really up to themselves.
09/13/2011
Silverdrop Silverdrop
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
OOOP, I forgot the link, if you're interested.

Article on Changing What We Think About Beginner Toys
Yes! This is exactly what I was trying to say, only you did it with less ranting and more coherence.
09/13/2011
PassionQT PassionQT
Great article! It is all relative. I'm sure a beginner can afford better materials, but they may want to experiment more first with several styles before dropping a lot of money on a toy that may/may not work for them in the end. Heck, I've used lots of rabbits made of many materials and my fave is still a jelly one and costs $25. I'll use that ANY day over my Jopen Vanity vibes.
09/13/2011
Silverdrop Silverdrop
One of my first toys was a $10 bullet that finally gave out after more than a year of regular and enthusiastic use. I wouldn't hesitate to recommend that bullet to a beginner if I remembered what brand or model it was. It doesn't have to be expensive to be a good toy, but it does have to be well made and provide good value and pleasure.
09/13/2011
Ghost Ghost
I never recommend cheap toys for beginners, but you know what, whenever I recommend something high quality (and often expensive), I am ignored. Usually the person buys something cheap instead after another user recommends a cheap item.
09/14/2011
Ryuson Ryuson
Quote:
Originally posted by Dawn (Lilac Distraction)
Usually, items with cheaper price tags (aka lower quality) are suggested for beginners who haven't tried that type of thing before and want to experiment. How do you know if you like ____ stimulation if you haven't tried it? What if you ...
I agree! I try to rate each section of the review for beginners/advanced users. Such as "The material would be good for beginners or advanced users... But the girth may be a challenge for some... The Shape however would be a nice way to start of G spot play"
So that people can make their own opinions!
09/14/2011
WierdAl WierdAl
Quote:
Originally posted by Silverdrop
I have been reading a lot of reviews lately, and I keep seeing this over and over again. People rate a toy two or three stars and then say 'I would only recommend this for beginners'.

Why - WHY?! would you recommend a poor quality sex ...
You have a good point. However for a person just new to using toys they might be looking to buy a cheap toy to see if they like using it. The reviewer maybe spending good money on toys with 5 stars, and when a cheap toy doesn't live up to the reviewers expectations they get a lower star rating. And the comment is added, great for a begginer. (example, You take someone out to Red Lobster for dinner. They have never had seafood before, they develop the Red Lobster taste. Then you take them to Long John Silvers and they don't like it so much).
09/14/2011
Kkay Kkay
Hm. I don't think that poor-quality toys are suitable for beginners, but there are some toys that I wouldn't recommend for a more advanced user that I would suggest for someone who is looking for a low-priced toy, or someone who is looking to try different materials. I've bought inexpensive glass toys that I didn't love, but that I would 100% recommend to a beginner just looking to try glass.

To me, sex toys depend a lot on what an individual desires. Without experiencing a variety of toys, someone can't find out what works for their body and their needs. Inexpensive toys that are a good representative of their type will continue to be something that I will recommend for someone looking to experience that type of toy before committing to the high price tag that comes with many of the better toys.
09/14/2011
Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
You've made some very good points here. We try to say "good for users who like..." more than "good for beginners", because who's to say what every beginner would like? Alan & I have used the phrase in some reviews when we thought a toy was something that we would suggest to a non-toy savvy friend or that we would have liked when we were new, but we still lean toward the "good for users who..." thing in most cases though.

The one area where we've used the "beginners" phrase most often is cock rings: Alan labels certain rings as beginner-friendly if they're durable, adaptable to many sizes, and not something that could potentially get stuck on an unsuspecting newbie's dick!
09/14/2011
~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
I think many things need to be taken into consideration when reading reviews.

For example...

I've tried a lot - holy shit, a LOT - of toys. So many that I'm pretty much a toy snob at this point and only bother with my ...
"I've tried a lot - holy shit, a LOT - of toys. So many that I'm pretty much a toy snob at this point and only bother with my favorites. So, should I be handed a $12.99 plastic bullet, I'd probably turn up my nose a bit and rate it at around a 2 or 3 stars -- because, in my experience, it's not on par with my 5 star toys. " EXACTLY.

I usually say a toy is 2-3 stars due to lacking "wow" because of only have one function or not many speeds etc. Because some toys with many functions can be hard to use if you are not experienced with toys, I often say that those simpler toys are good for beginners. I would never say a truely CRAPPY toy is good for beginners, however.
09/14/2011
Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Alan & Michele
You've made some very good points here. We try to say "good for users who like..." more than "good for beginners", because who's to say what every beginner would like? Alan & I have used the phrase in some reviews when ...
This is pretty much me too, or at least how I try and phrase things. I know I've said "good for beginners" in the past, but at this point I try to stick with things like "would be good for those scared to try vibrations or know they don't like super strong vibrations" or something along those lines.
09/14/2011
sktb0007 sktb0007
It's funny because I read this yesterday and mentioned how I've never really seen that before, and today while reading through some of the newer reviews, I did!
09/14/2011
Liz2 Liz2
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
I think many things need to be taken into consideration when reading reviews.

For example...

I've tried a lot - holy shit, a LOT - of toys. So many that I'm pretty much a toy snob at this point and only bother with my ...
Carrie Ann, my thoughts exactly, with vibes for example, the simple ones can be great for beginners as they were for me at one time.

To my friends, I have suggested using toys is like learning to ride a bike....small and sometimes with training wheels but you don't stay there......You learn, become confident and move on.

I love the Eleven for example, but would never suggest it for a newbie as beyond the price it would probably be unsatisfactory. I hate to see women become toy discouraged.
09/17/2011
Total posts: 28
Unique posters: 19