Weird Things You Do with Toys While Reviewing??

Contributor: Splendwhore Splendwhore
Does anyone else do weird things with toys while writing reviews? I usually fondle it a lot while trying to describe the item. Sometimes I like to squish toys, or if it's a vibrator, turn it on and let it spin around in circles, etc. ^_^;
07/30/2010
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Contributor: Sir Sir
Other than wear the product, nothing at all. I honestly do not fondle my things, unless I am in my bedroom alone.
07/30/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Oh man! I'm so happy I'm not the only one. When I'm trying to describe the material I squish and fondle and smell and prod and tap on things. When I'm trying to figure out how to describe vibrations and stuff I'll turn it on then set it down in front of me while I type, lol
07/30/2010
Contributor: MuffysPinguLove MuffysPinguLove
Yes, I too fondle the products too while writing reviews. Once or twice I've also marched around the apartment waving it like a baton, not even thinking "oh hey you're twirling around a sex toy, the windows are wide open and people are walking by..."
07/30/2010
Contributor: Lustful Dreams Lustful Dreams
I do the same things. I usually sit there with the product in hand before/after using it and really examine it and play around with it to be sure I can give the best description I can.

When I got my Emigi I swear I played with that thing for an hour while writing the review ... and by hand, I mean I always try to do this.
07/30/2010
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
I get my glasses and magnifying glass so I can read the labels and ingredients. I don't see well, so I can't read labels or instructions without both glasses and a magnifying glass most of the time.

I don't have a lap top, and our computer is in a common area of our house, the home library, so when I am going to be reviewing toys that are obviously sex toys (not bottles of lube or toy cleaner and things) I do it either really early in the morning or very late at night, where I won't be disturbed.

I also may measure stuff, and feel the material and play with the buttons to make sure I didn't miss anything, if it's an accurate assessment.
07/30/2010
Contributor: Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
I set the toy on my desk for a few days, right off to my left where I will see it and be inspired to touch it often. Having it right there, always in sight, seems to help me pick things up without really thinking about it, helps me get a really good feeling for the toy almost subconsciously. It also reminds me to use it a few more times before I write that review!
07/30/2010
Contributor: Splendwhore Splendwhore
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
Oh man! I'm so happy I'm not the only one. When I'm trying to describe the material I squish and fondle and smell and prod and tap on things. When I'm trying to figure out how to describe vibrations and stuff I'll turn it on then ... more
Haha, I do the same thing. ^_^
07/30/2010
Contributor: Splendwhore Splendwhore
Quote:
Originally posted by MuffysPinguLove
Yes, I too fondle the products too while writing reviews. Once or twice I've also marched around the apartment waving it like a baton, not even thinking "oh hey you're twirling around a sex toy, the windows are wide open and people are walking by..."
Oh god, I've done this once or twice. Perhaps not waving it around like a baton, but if it's a toy I'm particularly attached to, I'll tote it around the apartment with me. Sometimes I twirl or wave it around while just sitting at my desk, but I've never gone on a parade with an item.
07/30/2010
Contributor: Splendwhore Splendwhore
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
I set the toy on my desk for a few days, right off to my left where I will see it and be inspired to touch it often. Having it right there, always in sight, seems to help me pick things up without really thinking about it, helps me get a really good ... more
I tend to leave the items I'm reviewing on my desk as well. It helps remind me I have to use them, examine them, etc.
07/30/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by Splendwhore
Does anyone else do weird things with toys while writing reviews? I usually fondle it a lot while trying to describe the item. Sometimes I like to squish toys, or if it's a vibrator, turn it on and let it spin around in circles, etc. ^_^;
I fondle and turn them on and off. I will smell and lick them (if the item calls for it, I generally don't smell or lick books...)I read the boxes, read the pamphlets and generally disappear into a sex toy haze while writing. I don't normally use the toy while writing the review since my computer is usually in the middle of the room and I have 3 kids. I am more discreet when they are in the room but if they aren't then I am stroking, smelling, tasting and generally trying to fully experience the toy while writing the review.
07/30/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by MuffysPinguLove
Yes, I too fondle the products too while writing reviews. Once or twice I've also marched around the apartment waving it like a baton, not even thinking "oh hey you're twirling around a sex toy, the windows are wide open and people are walking by..."
OMG could you imagine a candid camera show featuring sex toy reviewers? TOOOO FUNNY!
07/30/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
OMG could you imagine a candid camera show featuring sex toy reviewers? TOOOO FUNNY!
Omg, I would love to watch some of those!
07/30/2010
Contributor: Misfit Momma Misfit Momma
I always have the toy I am writing about sitting on my lap, or on the desk. I shake them and squeeze them to see if they are floppy. The one that came in the mail yesterday, I held in place and challenged my husband to a cock fight!

I guess he is a little more squeamish than me because the kids were still awake (They were in bed, but not asleep yet) and he didn't think it was as funny as I did...I really need to get myself a harness
07/30/2010
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
I keep the toy right by me while I'm reviewing it and pick it up and look it over quite often while I'm writing. Another thing I do with some toys, is if I'm feeling uninspired to write the review, I go use it for a while to get the mental juices flowing. LOL!
07/31/2010
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
Yeah, I do funny things sometimes to get the feel of a to. I also try to come up with alternative uses, as well as running it through my hands and visualizing various ways to use it in the intended manner.

The oddest, I guess, are the quasi-scientific tests - for instance: Is this toy (Tenga Egg) truely silicone? Lets lather it up with a bunch of oils, let it sit for a while, and test to see if it is degrading.
07/31/2010
Contributor: sexyhellokitty sexyhellokitty
I keep the toy by me. I also make a mental note while using the product.
08/03/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
I will intentionally smell and taste the toy (within reason of course...i don't taste things that would never have any business being in a mouth) if I'm reviewing it. I don't necessarily do that with ones I'm not going to review.
08/04/2010
Contributor: Liz Liz
I keep the toy sitting in front of me when I'm writing the review, especially if it's one that has a lot of settings. Sometimes writing the review will make me think of issues I didn't consider when testing the toy originally, so it's nice to have it handy in case I need to stop writing and return to the test phase.
08/04/2010
Contributor: NymphetamineKiss NymphetamineKiss
For me, it's to...

turn it on through settings: with no background noise, with music, with tv, under duvet... etc

try it on other areas of the body than it might be stated for (i.e. I have some nipple suckers - I happen to know they're delicious on the clit...)

I often end up at the manufacturer's site - sometimes they have additional descriptions, images or similar

i have also been known to get out other very similar toys to do a comparitive testing!
08/04/2010
Contributor: Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
We do a lot of weird things when reviewing them, such as sniffing and sometimes tasting them. I don't think we'd be inclined to deliberately cram sex toys right up to nose level and take a big whiff under normal circumstances . We also turn them on and leave the room to see if they can be heard from outside of the room. And if it's silicone and made by any company besides Tantus, Lelo, Vixen Creations, or Fun Factory, we try to set it on fire.
08/04/2010
Contributor: twistedheartsx twistedheartsx
Quote:
Originally posted by Alan & Michele
We do a lot of weird things when reviewing them, such as sniffing and sometimes tasting them. I don't think we'd be inclined to deliberately cram sex toys right up to nose level and take a big whiff under normal circumstances . We also turn ... more
Is Silicone not flammable? This is news to me if so, haha. That last part scared me!
08/04/2010
Contributor: Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
Quote:
Originally posted by twistedheartsx
Is Silicone not flammable? This is news to me if so, haha. That last part scared me!
LOL! Ok, that probably sounded worse than intended! No, pure silicone isn't flammable. It will just make a sooty mark that you can wash off. Silicone blends melt or burn.
08/04/2010
Contributor: Splendwhore Splendwhore
Quote:
Originally posted by Alan & Michele
LOL! Ok, that probably sounded worse than intended! No, pure silicone isn't flammable. It will just make a sooty mark that you can wash off. Silicone blends melt or burn.
Wow, I had no clue about that! That should be like, our fact of the day.
08/04/2010
Contributor: 00 00
Depending on what it is...I leave it sitting around where I can see it all the time and be inspired to try it out and use if often. (We don't have kids living at home and thus it is not uncommon to find sex toys in the kitchen, livingroom or anywhere lately). I touch, smell, rub, squeeze, lick, stroke, ect....and even talk to them most of the time. Yes, I talk to the toys....I find it encourages "them" to give me their best performance. Hey, everyone wants to get applause! When testing them out, if they are battery powered, I run them though their speeds, settings in my hand first, under covers and even turn them on in one room and close the door behind me to see if I can hear them through the door. This is all before I try them out in more intimate ways. Luckily, if they are BDSM toys, such as floggers, paddles, ect...I have a wonderfully delightful husband, Randy, who jumps at the chance to try them out on me. He is so sweet. Everything I review gets several 'tries' over many days or even a few weeks if necessary. As my husband says, I put things "through their paces" and make them earn their keep in this house.
08/04/2010
Contributor: Blinker Blinker
They usually end up in my mouth, honestly. Especially vibrators that are squishy. I gotta stop chewing on them before I injure the poor things. Usually if I'm reviewing a toy, I'm on my bed with the toy nearby. My cat's always in my room and she rolls around on the toys sometimes, or tries to chew on them.

This is why everything I own has cat hair on it-I can't have nice things!
08/04/2010
Contributor: Envy Envy
Quote:
Originally posted by Splendwhore
Does anyone else do weird things with toys while writing reviews? I usually fondle it a lot while trying to describe the item. Sometimes I like to squish toys, or if it's a vibrator, turn it on and let it spin around in circles, etc. ^_^;
Hahahha, now I have this random urge to have vibrator races. Which one will pass the finish line first?! (We need a laughing emote)
08/04/2010
Contributor: gone77 gone77
Yep, I often touch, squeeze, caress my toys when I'm reviewing them. Sometimes I'll lick them to do the whole "taste/no taste" part of the review. I've been known to fiddle with them while I'm listening to music and singing, especially when I first get them. I'm not sure why, it's just something I do! lol
08/04/2010
Contributor: PassionQT PassionQT
I received one that was a dud and just received its replacement today. I'm going to dissect the broken one!
08/04/2010
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by PassionQT
I received one that was a dud and just received its replacement today. I'm going to dissect the broken one!
Ooh, I wanted to do that with one of my duds, but the replacement was a dud as well, so I just gave up on the whole thing
08/11/2010