Virgin and Dildos

Virgin and Dildos

Miss Anonymous Miss Anonymous
My sister is a virgin and she wants a dildo. I've tried talking her out of it, and to just use vibs. She doesn't want too. Dildos are my area of sex toys. I have no idea what to even direct her to.
06/15/2011
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daniel and frances daniel and frances
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Anonymous
My sister is a virgin and she wants a dildo. I've tried talking her out of it, and to just use vibs. She doesn't want too. Dildos are my area of sex toys. I have no idea what to even direct her to.
I'm surprised she wants her first penetration to be with a toy... Maybe I'm too sentimental, but I wouldn't choose that. *Shrug* I suppose something small and skinny might work best?
06/15/2011
DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
Blueberry Bliss was my first toy, and I enjoyed it, though it may be a bit large for a true true beginner. Other ones that may be good would be The Sedeux or the Velvet Touch, which is a vibrator that is small enough to be used for novice penetration.


Daniel and Frances, not everyone considers their first penetration to be significant--I didn't. Different strokes for different folks, and all.
06/15/2011
Ms. Paprika Ms. Paprika
I'd have to agree with Delicious-pretty much any vibrator under 1" in diameter should be manageable. Also, you can always tell her a vibrator can be used as a dildo.
06/15/2011
MaryExy MaryExy
One of the Fleur de Lis silicone ones would be good, but they might be a tad too large.

I'd recommend something like the Siri or MiMi as a first toy for a virgin, though. I don't think I'd want to have lost my virginity to a sex toy.
06/15/2011
DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
Quote:
Originally posted by MaryExy
One of the Fleur de Lis silicone ones would be good, but they might be a tad too large.

I'd recommend something like the Siri or MiMi as a first toy for a virgin, though. I don't think I'd want to have lost my virginity to a sex toy.
Virginity is usually defined as sex with another person, not with a sex toy. If she wants to use a penetrative toy, why shouldn't she?


And Ms. Paprika is right, traditional vibrators can also be used as dildos, so I'd definitely go with a versatile one. 1-1.5" should be fine for a beginner. You might want to ask her to come on the website herself with you and see what appeals to her, and you can discuss together her best options.
06/15/2011
Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
If she's really got her heart set on something non-vibrating, my personal recommendation would be the Tantus Silk line - either a small or a medium. Or you can do what DeliciousSurprise suggested and let her browse the site with you and see what catches her eye. Just be sure to go over things like materials and sizes with her, so that she understands everything about the toys she looks at.

I'm a virgin myself. I've never had a sexual partner, but I can understand the appeal of trying different sex toys. As much as I love vibes, regular ol' dildos can be fun, too! So I don't think you should talk her out of it.
06/15/2011
nuclearn!ke nuclearn!ke
You know, this reminds me of this puberty pamphlet I had from way back in elementary school that covered the question, "Will I still be a virgin if I use tampons?" It may not be the best connection here, since you can't realistically masturbate with a tampon (though I imagine someone has tried), but I would have to agree with Delicious. Unless you've had sex with a real live person, you're a virgin.

I've never had a sex partner and I can honestly say that at this point in my life I don't want one (college, job, family, friends, etc.). I want to experience sex with someone I am in love with and trust completely. Until then, playing with sex toys allows me to learn about myself and release pent-up sexual energy.

As for your sister, Neesa, how realistic would it be for her to show you a dildo she is interested in and for you to explain all the positives and negatives? There are plenty of options on Eden that are beginner friendly, typically 1 to 1.5 inches in diameter and with mild or no texture. Who knows? She might decide against a dildo anyway and opt for your suggestion of starting with a vibrator.
07/05/2011
Jenimi Jenimi
Quote:
Originally posted by nuclearn!ke
You know, this reminds me of this puberty pamphlet I had from way back in elementary school that covered the question, "Will I still be a virgin if I use tampons?" It may not be the best connection here, since you can't realistically ...
power to the virgin with sex toys!! That was me a year ago and trust my box of toys is older then that. the more open you are about sex the more open she'll be with you and then you can help her out, EdenFantasy is amazing, work with her.
07/05/2011
kfdarling kfdarling
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Anonymous
My sister is a virgin and she wants a dildo. I've tried talking her out of it, and to just use vibs. She doesn't want too. Dildos are my area of sex toys. I have no idea what to even direct her to.
She should really just stick to her fingers or vibes and save herself for a real partner.
01/04/2012
Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
Quote:
Originally posted by kfdarling
She should really just stick to her fingers or vibes and save herself for a real partner.
Why do you say that? Virginity is placed on such a ridiculous pedestal at times, and "saving yourself" for the real thing just prevents you from enjoying yourself and exploring your own sexuality in your own time. No one should feel they have to wait for a real person if they want to experience sexual ecstasy now.

There's really nothing wrong with a virgin using dildos, especially if they truly feel good to that person. I'm a virgin, and dildos are my favorite type of toy.
01/04/2012
Eva Schwaltz Eva Schwaltz
Quote:
Originally posted by Rin (aka Nire)
Why do you say that? Virginity is placed on such a ridiculous pedestal at times, and "saving yourself" for the real thing just prevents you from enjoying yourself and exploring your own sexuality in your own time. No one should feel they ...
I agree. Using dildos doesn't mean your virginity is gone, so all the power to her sister if she wants one.
01/04/2012
Mihoshi4301 Mihoshi4301
Quote:
Originally posted by Rin (aka Nire)
Why do you say that? Virginity is placed on such a ridiculous pedestal at times, and "saving yourself" for the real thing just prevents you from enjoying yourself and exploring your own sexuality in your own time. No one should feel they ...
I agree. I'm a virgin, and sometime I use dildos because vibrators just don't cut it. She probably knows what she wants to try, and if she wants to try a dildo, then she should.
01/13/2012
Oomph2687 Oomph2687
Start out with slender vibes.
01/13/2012
BlueFawn369 BlueFawn369
Quote:
Originally posted by Oomph2687
Start out with slender vibes.
I'm exactly like Miss Nessa's sister. I have a vibe about 1inch, could be a little less. It's a power vibe, but it doesn't really do much for me. So would you recommend upping the size by half an inch or so?
01/28/2012
icyqueen icyqueen
Quote:
Originally posted by Rin (aka Nire)
Why do you say that? Virginity is placed on such a ridiculous pedestal at times, and "saving yourself" for the real thing just prevents you from enjoying yourself and exploring your own sexuality in your own time. No one should feel they ...
Agreed!

Why waiting for a real person if you can enjoy yourself and discover/enjoy your own sexuality? That's what sextoys are made for.
02/24/2012
ace.eric.pollen ace.eric.pollen
Quote:
Originally posted by icyqueen
Agreed!

Why waiting for a real person if you can enjoy yourself and discover/enjoy your own sexuality? That's what sextoys are made for.
here here!
07/26/2012
chwifey1994 chwifey1994
Quote:
Originally posted by nuclearn!ke
You know, this reminds me of this puberty pamphlet I had from way back in elementary school that covered the question, "Will I still be a virgin if I use tampons?" It may not be the best connection here, since you can't realistically ...
What about circumference and length. I'm a virgin too and considering a realistic dildo.
07/31/2012
Girly Juice Girly Juice
My recommendation would be the Tantus Acute. It's small enough that a virgin should be able to take it easily with lube, but it's also a really really good G-spotting dildo. I've been a non-virgin for years and the Acute is still one of my favorite toys.
08/01/2012
chwifey1994 chwifey1994
Quote:
Originally posted by Girly Juice
My recommendation would be the Tantus Acute. It's small enough that a virgin should be able to take it easily with lube, but it's also a really really good G-spotting dildo. I've been a non-virgin for years and the Acute is still one of ...
What about Cyberskin, could I get one of those? If so what length,width and circumference would you recommend?
08/01/2012
namelesschaos namelesschaos
What baffles me about this whole thing is that people are ok with a person using vibrators for presumable non-penetrative pleasure yet freak out at the idea of experiencing first for pleasure penetration from something other than a penis. This reflect a sexual politics focused on the phallus and what typical gives it pleasure. Learning to orgasm would be a far more important event for most, yet we as a society consider it less important then penetration.

The truth is penetration is actually not important once you strip away the sociopolitical means we give to it ,other wise we'd look at going to the gynecologists, in whole different light. What is actual is important pleasure/excitement/bo nding ,here a blog post if your still not following: link. The politics of avoiding purposeful penetration in order to save "yourself for someone" ,yet being ok with nonpenetrative forms of pleasure, just reinforce that phallocentric idea that a women vagina is a for a man's pleasure not her own.
08/01/2012
3TLOVER 3TLOVER
Quote:
Originally posted by Ms. Paprika
I'd have to agree with Delicious-pretty much any vibrator under 1" in diameter should be manageable. Also, you can always tell her a vibrator can be used as a dildo.
i agree!
08/01/2012
chwifey1994 chwifey1994
Quote:
Originally posted by chwifey1994
What about Cyberskin, could I get one of those? If so what length,width and circumference would you recommend?
I'm thinking about getting link OR link are these okay for virgins?
08/01/2012
AriaRN AriaRN
So what did she end up picking out?
08/06/2012
Claire-Bear Claire-Bear
Betty Dodson recommends for girls to penetrate themselves first before anyone else does. It helps with pain and discomfort of the first time, and it also helps a female get in touch with what's actually pleasurable for herself.
08/06/2012
Neurogasm Neurogasm
I actually recommend that. It lets her be more in control and find out what she really likes. I'd go with something not too huge and with a smooth texture, definitely made of silicone.
08/06/2012
JTang JTang
Hi, I'm currently in the same position. I bought the tantus acute and the head feels a little big but I haven't really tried hard to get it in. It just got uncomfortable at some point and I stopped. Do you think I should try harder with the acute or go with something even smaller like the tantus silk small? I mean I don't really want to waste money by buying something I will only use a couple times you know what I mean?
01/23/2013
VirginTerritory VirginTerritory
What about someone that's a virgin, but has experience with masturbation?

I've used vibrators, but never a dildo. After all of the reviews I've read about Vixskin, I want a Goodfella, but after reading this thread, I'm completely undecided again.

How would I know what the right size would be for me? I def don't want to get something too small...
01/25/2013
Total posts: 28
Unique posters: 24