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Originally posted by
trios
'She has really learned to like the full feeling of the larger toys - but needs the warm up.'
Does she do this because you ask to use it, or is she asking for it first now? (My wife will do it with my insistence, and I wonder if she
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'She has really learned to like the full feeling of the larger toys - but needs the warm up.'
Does she do this because you ask to use it, or is she asking for it first now? (My wife will do it with my insistence, and I wonder if she will turn around one day and ask for it first?!)
'I've pretty much retired the Champlette and go right to the Champ!'
Should I buy even another dildo? If you really feel strongly that it will help, will do so (I value wisdom, plus your wife sounds like she is just like my wife). Just don't want to have another thing to give away...
Lastly, how long does it take for your wife to warm up? We have a sleeping baby in the room that wakes periodically, and sometimes time is of essence!
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As you probably know mood and hormones mean that the landscape is continually changing. We have dozens of toys for that reason. I'll choose a few toys of various shapes and sizes and bring them to bed. 99% of the time we use the toys to bring her to an orgasm or two before going on to intercourse (or maybe a BJ).
Given a choice she would rarely choose a larger dildo (but it has happened) - she's a little embarrassed to ask for a big one. But 90% of the time if I use the larger toys she loves the feeling. About 10% - she'll just ask me to go with something smaller.
I buy more toys for several reasons;
My wife has indicated some special feature of a toy she likes - and look for something that has that feature.
I like adventure and my wife now knows that when I buy new things - she gets to experience new and different paths to orgasm
Materials and shapes are always changing - as are our evolving tastes - pardon the cliche; 'variety is the spice of life'
Ah the dilema of children - getting them out of the bedroom is going to be the first - but not last challenge. My 19 year old is back from college - talking about moving back in. My wife loves him to death - but does not welcome having to worry about him him hearing her now more vocal orgasms in the next room.
Honestly the 'warm-up' time is rather extended and with a baby right next to us, my wife could not relax at all. Kudo's to your gal for trying. Being attuned to her level of arousal requires all your senses - observing her nipples (candle light required) listening to her breathing, sensing her level of lubrication are all clues to how she's doing.
I tend to go slowly because its better for her to be 'begging' for more, than for me to go to quickly. One key sign for me is when she begins pressing her hips towards my thrusts - this tells me that she's looking for me to go deeper, past her g-spot to her a-spot. The a-spot is the key to her being able to have a vaginal orgasm and to 'gush'. The a-spot is sometimes called the AFE Zone
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Once your wife discovers she has an a-spot, she'll learn the value of larger toys and deeper penetration.
Good luck and enjoy the journey - there will be more challenges and victories. Your doing good when she tells you that you know her body better than she does - that's the best compliment my wife ever gave me!
